Do you think our guys in the West are as prone to the dramatics as resorting to suicide? I personally think they've thrown in the towel; a quiet acceptance of defeat which is mostly attributable to the broader culture that has compounded the idea that it's toxic for a man to question a lady about her antics.
This is the absolute crux of the matter; to find a girl who's pretty enough to get the lad hot and bothered BUT not too pretty that her attractiveness has made her a target for other lads from the moment, as they say in Punjabi, her jawani char gayi in her mid-teens onwards.
Before the undercover brahmgyanis chime in about prioritising kamayi and Gurmukh values, for those of our people who don't float around in their own little Satyug that keeps the rest of the Kalyugi world out (a bit like Trump's non-existent wall), these are valid considerations that should be looked at in detail for the rank-and-file people of our community.
If the guy himself is between the 4-7 range of attractiveness, he needs to look for a girl within the same range. BUT Punjabi guys (and men in general) over-estimate their physical appeal. A man, more than anyone, has a tendency to inflate his own sense of being. He finds it very difficult to process that he may not be what he thinks he is.
A guy in this 4-7 range (which is the vast majority of males on the planet) going after a 9 or 10 girl is living in cloud-cuckoo land if he thinks even a typically middle-class, middle-income job (£30-60k) is going to keep a top-tier girl placated for the next 40-50 years of her life (or at least until she lets her self go or hits the menopause depending on what comes first. Even then her appeal to men may fade, but her aadataa -- habits -- will be nigh on set in stone. If they're rotten since decades eariler, the guy is in for trouble). I'd go as far to say that even a multi-millionaire would need to be on-top of his game from the day he's married to the day he drops dead in order to keep a 9 or 10 as his wife.
Today, more than ever, a girl's history counts so much. From what I've seen, the majority of apne guys live in a world that is detached from reality. They may consider themselves street-smart and worldly, but in many respects their understanding of the world is, IMO, based on an inaccurate simulation of a wider culture they don't truly understand. As such, those blind-spots is where they end up being blind-sided by the unforeseen.
Then you've got to figure out whether her jawani had indeed gone to her head quite a while ago, or if she's been sensible with it. The answer to this question, IMO, comes IN PART from studying the immediate family, i.e. the dad, mum, and siblings.