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To be proud of your caste is not a Sikhi thing. Guru Ji says not to feel proud of your caste and do not discriminate others not on the same caste as yourself. We are all born according to our karmas therefore it’s wrong to feel proud of yourself and your caste or to look down on others because they are higher or lower caste than yours. Sikhs are not allowed to practice caste discrimination in most areas of their lives!

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One thing I've noticed is apne who believe in caste can take advantage of those who don't believe in caste. Basically they put on a facade of not believing in caste only when it serves their purpose. Example when it comes to marriage, they will allow their son to marry a girl from another caste if she's pretty, educated, PR etc, but the same people would not allow their own daughter to marry a boy from another caste.  If non-belief in caste is not genunie and reciprocated by the other party, it all feels very one-sided and a feeling of being taken advantage of which leads to tribalism. 

Very much like how muslims allow men to marry non-muslim women but not the other way around.

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1 minute ago, Gulzar Singh said:

One thing I've noticed is apne who believe in caste can take advantage of those who don't believe in caste. Basically they put on a facade of not believing in caste only when it serves their purpose. Example when it comes to marriage, they will allow their son to marry a girl from another caste if she's pretty, educated, PR etc, but the same people would not allow their own daughter to marry a boy from another caste.  If non-belief in caste is not genunie and reciprocated by the other party, it all feels very one-sided and a feeling of being taken advantage of which leads to tribalism. 

Very much like how muslims allow men to marry non-muslim women but not the other way around.

I know people who believe in caste often lie about it, and pretend to be the opposite, or keep very quiet about the subject to get other Sikhs guards down. 

I think this is standard practice for them. Apnay shouldn't quickly believe or trust certain people's words. Instead look at how they behave and how they socialise.  That'll give you the biggest clue. These days, most people are clued up to these snakes anyway. 

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56 minutes ago, Gulzar Singh said:

One thing I've noticed is apne who believe in caste can take advantage of those who don't believe in caste. Basically they put on a facade of not believing in caste only when it serves their purpose. Example when it comes to marriage, they will allow their son to marry a girl from another caste if she's pretty, educated, PR etc, but the same people would not allow their own daughter to marry a boy from another caste.  If non-belief in caste is not genunie and reciprocated by the other party, it all feels very one-sided and a feeling of being taken advantage of which leads to tribalism. 

Very much like how muslims allow men to marry non-muslim women but not the other way around.

It goes the other way too. When they can't get one of their daughters married off to one of their own, all of a sudden they become more and more 'accepting' of inter-caste marriages. Then if they can't offload her still, often they start opening up to interfaith or interracial marriages. Damn hypocrites. lol

 

    

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I really don't think those families are interested in continuing sikhi and sometimes marrying our of culture can be a good thing for them instead of corrupting sikh families. Some of these girls will mess up sikh families, there are exceptions, some girls will follow sikhi better if she marries into a good family. It's a gamble though with these girls from these families, especially if they are drinking or hookah/sheesha smoking girls, maybe dressing nangi on instagram, or demanding clean shaven or haircut; then it's probably best to stay away from therse families instead of marrying!

Yep reap what you sow!  However I will say this, sometimes it is our own fault for girls marrying out. Too many of us lack a caring nature and can be ridiculously harsh on our own with disabilities.  I've heard a story were a cripple Sikh girl ended up marrying a muslim because apne couldn't look past it.  Some families reject girls whose father is ill thinking that her offspring may get the same illness. Pathetic.

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4 hours ago, ipledgeblue said:

I really don't think those families are interested in continuing sikhi and sometimes marrying our of culture can be a good thing for them instead of corrupting sikh families. Some of these girls will mess up sikh families, there are exceptions, some girls will follow sikhi better if she marries into a good family. It's a gamble though with these girls from these families, especially if they are drinking or hookah/sheesha smoking girls, maybe dressing nangi on instagram, or demanding clean shaven or haircut; then it's probably best to stay away from therse families instead of marrying!

Amen bro. Sikhi is Guru Ki Fauj. 

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1 hour ago, Gulzar Singh said:

Yep reap what you sow!  However I will say this, sometimes it is our own fault for girls marrying out. Too many of us lack a caring nature and can be ridiculously harsh on our own with disabilities.  I've heard a story were a cripple Sikh girl ended up marrying a muslim because apne couldn't look past it.  Some families reject girls whose father is ill thinking that her offspring may get the same illness. Pathetic.

We are not going about Anand Karaj authentically. If we were there would be no issues like this. The Sangat and the Vichola just find suitable matches. And without great legitimate objection, it should go through. 

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On the topic of four castes, I have noticed no one caste is proficient in everything. All have their positive and weak points.

Brahmins+Khatris are very good in intellect, command over languages, business sense, but lack in technical knowledge and artisan skills.  With my own eyes I've seen they are literally unable to use a screwdriver.

Jatts excel in health, stamina, stick up for each other, (over)confident. But education lacking. Big Ego. Impatient.

Lohars, Ramdasia, Tarkhans etc excel in artisan skills requiring use of hands, fine motor skills (includes sewing etc), patience, technical knowledge. Weakness include lack of business sense, and like most engineering types reserved/not great communicators.

Point is caste discrimination is mostly based on looking only at the negative aspects of each group and ignoring the positives.  Might be helpful if we change perspective and see what we have to gain by marrying into another caste. The more we mix up the more likely we will produce offspring that have all the positives of the four castes in one person which is what Guru-ji wanted. A kind of superhuman!  Think about it, a Singh who is a CEO, intelligent, physically fit, and can fix his own car! Ultimate Alpha!

 

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4 hours ago, Gulzar Singh said:

Yep reap what you sow!  However I will say this, sometimes it is our own fault for girls marrying out. Too many of us lack a caring nature and can be ridiculously harsh on our own with disabilities.  I've heard a story were a cripple Sikh girl ended up marrying a muslim because apne couldn't look past it.  Some families reject girls whose father is ill thinking that her offspring may get the same illness. Pathetic.

I know a family who called off an engagement when the prospective bride was seen with a rash on her hands. It was just a temporary thing because they were moving house at the time and cleaning stuff. Apparently, she wasn't wearing gloves when using various spray cleaners, etc, and her hands reacted to the chemicals. 😂 Mentalists.

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On 7/17/2022 at 2:00 PM, MisterrSingh said:

I know a family who called off an engagement when the prospective bride was seen with a rash on her hands. It was just a temporary thing because they were moving house at the time and cleaning stuff. Apparently, she wasn't wearing gloves when using various spray cleaners, etc, and her hands reacted to the chemicals. 😂 Mentalists.

The prospective bride was lucky.

I know a girl, pretty looking who for years rejected rishtay from keshdari boys, truck drivers, office clerks and shes now in her 40s still at home watching hindi serials waiting for her prince charming.

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3 hours ago, PuzzledToo said:

The prospective bride was lucky.

I know a girl, pretty looking who for years rejected rishtay from keshdari boys, truck drivers, office clerks and shes now in her 40s still at home watching hindi serials waiting for her prince charming.

Oh God. 😅

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16 hours ago, PuzzledToo said:

The prospective bride was lucky.

I know a girl, pretty looking who for years rejected rishtay from keshdari boys, truck drivers, office clerks and shes now in her 40s still at home watching hindi serials waiting for her prince charming.

Why do you think they were rejecting her? Normally, pretty women get snapped up?

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