About relatives and marriage

[Guest Kaur]

Sat Shri Akal ji, I was thinking many times should I discuss this topic in sikh forum or not. Now, I decided to share that.
I am living in Australia. When I came Australia after 1 year my father died. My all relatives tell or can say pressure my mom now you should found a girl for your son that will help you to come up from this situation. My mother was already in trauma so she thought thar her father, mother or bother, sister thinks good for her. So, all relatives started to found a girl for my brother. My mother’s sister(my massi ji) tells about a girl to my mother and said she is doing IELTS you should marry your son with that girl. Your daughter and son will be together in same country(Australia). All relatives know about that girl and her family( My mother’s father, mother, sisters and brothers). They did not give time to my brother and mother to investigate about girl’s family. They just told you should trust us. My mother and my brother went to see girl, my relatives said to my family say yes and do engagement now. They can’t say anything because all are old and experienced person. Then my brother married that girl and my brother spend all the money on marriage both sides and to send her to Australia. She just live with my brother only 15 days then she came Australia.Then, she started living with me in Australia. I spend my all money that i earned here on my bhabhi’s fees and other expenses. After 7 months my marriage fixed in NZ. I had to leave my bhabhi after marriage. Then we found the real face of all the relatives and my brother’s wife. After 3 to 4 month of my marriage( I am his sister) my brother found that his mother in law have AIDS and that girl also had relations with some boys before marriage. My all relatives already know about that. The girl tell my brother that they send Rishta to my dad when he is alive. But my dad refused. The girl’s mother have relations with many men in my village. When my brother talk about that to his wife she said I don’t want to live with you. My relatives support that girl and her mother and they forced my brother to transfer all the property under his wife’s name otherwise she will not invite you in abroad. My relatives told that you should send your mother to age care and break all relations with your sister and also give all the property to your wife. I didn’t believe that my mother’s sisters, mother, father, brothers told that. My brother spend around 40 lakh on his wife. Our all relatives should help my mother but they betrayed my mother and brother after my father’s death. Then it’s end to divorce of my brother with that girl. Then my all relatives start spreading  rumors about my mother. Now , we are looking a girl for my brother last 4 years. We don’t find a right match. My mother is in depression after this 2 incidents. My brother have everything we are just looking a simple girl who take care of my mother and brother. We are hoping waheguru ji will send a perfect match for my brother. 
 

Just want to tell everyone please don’t believe that you relatives search a right match for you. Always first found about the family background then take correct decision.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh.

[Guest Kaur]

If anyone help us how we find a perfect match for my brother. We paid in many marriage bureau and post ad on Facebook matrimonial group even in newspaper as well. Didn’t receive any response. We did everything that we can do. May waheguru give us a hope. 

Thanks

[Not2Cool2Argue]

Why can't your brother do IELTS? Why does he need to be married? Tell him to go work in Mumbai or Dubai and support himself and his mother like a man. Where is his anakh? Why are visas and women the only way out? 

It's sad panjabi boys who have never left panjab or seen beaches of India, want to go to canada...

 

[GurjantGnostic]

On 9/15/2022 at 9:05 PM, Not2Cool2Argue said:

Tell him to go work in Mumbai or Dubai and support himself and his mother like a man

That's not Gurmat. We don't burden children with our retirement. It's also tacky for women to define a man unless they want to be defined by one. 

Do daughters take care of fathers? Or they aren't a woman? No. Sexist. 

Does Gurbani tell parents not to teach their children to be reitrement babies? Yes. 

Does Gurbani tell parents to provide their own retirement. Yes. 

Do we take care of Each Other if possible. Yes. 

[GurjantGnostic]

On 9/11/2022 at 10:42 PM, Guest Kaur said:

Sat Shri Akal ji, I was thinking many times should I discuss this topic in sikh forum or not. Now, I decided to share that.
I am living in Australia. When I came Australia after 1 year my father died. My all relatives tell or can say pressure my mom now you should found a girl for your son that will help you to come up from this situation. My mother was already in trauma so she thought thar her father, mother or bother, sister thinks good for her. So, all relatives started to found a girl for my brother. My mother’s sister(my massi ji) tells about a girl to my mother and said she is doing IELTS you should marry your son with that girl. Your daughter and son will be together in same country(Australia). All relatives know about that girl and her family( My mother’s father, mother, sisters and brothers). They did not give time to my brother and mother to investigate about girl’s family. They just told you should trust us. My mother and my brother went to see girl, my relatives said to my family say yes and do engagement now. They can’t say anything because all are old and experienced person. Then my brother married that girl and my brother spend all the money on marriage both sides and to send her to Australia. She just live with my brother only 15 days then she came Australia.Then, she started living with me in Australia. I spend my all money that i earned here on my bhabhi’s fees and other expenses. After 7 months my marriage fixed in NZ. I had to leave my bhabhi after marriage. Then we found the real face of all the relatives and my brother’s wife. After 3 to 4 month of my marriage( I am his sister) my brother found that his mother in law have AIDS and that girl also had relations with some boys before marriage. My all relatives already know about that. The girl tell my brother that they send Rishta to my dad when he is alive. But my dad refused. The girl’s mother have relations with many men in my village. When my brother talk about that to his wife she said I don’t want to live with you. My relatives support that girl and her mother and they forced my brother to transfer all the property under his wife’s name otherwise she will not invite you in abroad. My relatives told that you should send your mother to age care and break all relations with your sister and also give all the property to your wife. I didn’t believe that my mother’s sisters, mother, father, brothers told that. My brother spend around 40 lakh on his wife. Our all relatives should help my mother but they betrayed my mother and brother after my father’s death. Then it’s end to divorce of my brother with that girl. Then my all relatives start spreading  rumors about my mother. Now , we are looking a girl for my brother last 4 years. We don’t find a right match. My mother is in depression after this 2 incidents. My brother have everything we are just looking a simple girl who take care of my mother and brother. We are hoping waheguru ji will send a perfect match for my brother. 
 

Just want to tell everyone please don’t believe that you relatives search a right match for you. Always first found about the family background then take correct decision.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh.

What a perversion of Anand Karaj and Rishte.