VeerSingh87

If he does thats his problem :lol2:

I am a couple of light years away as of now.

So you make an assumption about someone and mock him? Your actions are pathetic.

This thread is still going strong! Interesting to see how opinions vary so much! From dating is for fools to go out and be yourself.

I think the underlying sentiment is right though, I am not a true sikh, if I was life would be simpler either way, but maybe people like me just need to find women on the same wavelength, we cant all be perfect.

I did actually find a lovely lady by the way so heres hoping

Veer ji,

I encountered the same problems as you (although my beard was untrimmed).

It was extremely difficult to "get off the ground," as you put it.

My search was mainly online. Hardly any girls were open to even talking.

Among the 1% of girls who did give it a go, they almost all seemed rather disinterested right from the beginning. It was clear that they weren't really looking for a guy with a turban, and talking to one involved them stepping out of their comfort zone.

At first, I thought perhaps I didn't have enough personality and wasn't engaging enough. But I've never come off this way in "real life" among friends. And after taking a step back and looking at the situation, there wasn't much I could even do. Girls who had "agreed" to talk to me could hardly be bothered to arrange a proper first conversation or date. It's hard to get anywhere when you're not taken seriously before you even have much of a chance to present yourself.

Unless you are the exception to the rule, your options are limited to the following:

1. Accept a proper gursikh amritdhari lifestyle and come to terms with the idea of getting an arranged marriage to a gursikh girl. You will likely have to be open to girls from India.

2. Go to India. Girls there generally hate turbans too, but there are still enough girls desperate enough to leave India that you can use your NRI status as a bargaining chip.

3. If you are unwilling to accept a gursikh lifestyle and unwilling to go to India, you are between a rock and a hard place.

Attempting to "date" will lead to lots of frustration.

The only girls who want turbanned men are amritdhari and probably not the type who want to "date" and have a standard western-style courtship that many of us grow up expecting. They most likely want a proper gursikh arranged marriage.

So you will be left with a bunch of girls who, all else being equal, would prefer a clean-shaven man. You will still have a chance, but you will have to really stand out in order to be considered over the plethora of clean-shaven "sikh" men. If you are not a superstar, you will most likely be left with girls who are considered undesirable by most men (for whatever reason), and are only talking to you because they can't "do better"

Many will post in this thread and dispute what I have to say, but it is the cold, honest truth. You have to take a long, hard look at where you are as a Sikh. The problem men like me have is that we are hypocrites who want to have our cake and eat it too. We want to be who we are, but are unwilling to adopt a completely gursikh outlook and get an arranged marriage. We are too caught up in the notion of dating and finding a girl who "likes" us and can't let that go.

Spot on, tough to hear but you have summarised it, the hypocrites bit especially.

Well i will keep trying, pretty sucessful on all fronts but it does feel like there's a big part of life missing.

well I don't know about others but this post is really nice and interesting.....anyways can I ask are u baptised or non baptised? bcz it does matter while choosing life partners

Hey, thanks for your reply, non baptised, so fair to say i'm half of nothing if i'm honest, but we can all only do so much.

Totally agree, that's really my problem, I look like something but I am not committed to it so i'm giving mixed signals in both directions

People

My first post here and i'm on a fact finding mission.

What are ladies views on guys who tie turbans? Specifically turban and trimmed beards.

My agenda? Well i've been searching for a partner for a full year i'd say getting off the ground just seems impossible. This isn't a "dating is against our rehat" type situation, your opinion is valid but not relevant.

Am I just thinking of my pug as an excuse? I think i'm ok looking, doing well at work, in shape, pretty decent in nature.

I'm in the UK and just want to understand what sikh girls are thinking? Is it the not fitting in, being different?