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  1. Guest

    Destroyed In Marriage

    Hi all, Sorry for long post, all Information is necessary to understand the situation. I got engaged to a girl in India in March 2015. I felt she didn’t want to talk to me when I called her, when I talk to my parents, they said the marriage broker(aka “vichola” who was also the girl`s nana) told you and us that girl is very nice, cultured and shy, that’s why she doesn’t talk. Everytime I called her, I asked everything, she never ask me anything and only answered in yes, no, um….I again talk to my parents but they scold me, I didn’t say anything again. We all went to India and I got married in December 2015, we got home from the marriage at 8:30 pm. First thing girl says when I walk inside room, “I got married against my will”. Next morning, she says “If you touch me, I will commit suicide”. Third day, she points at the newspaper article as if to show me “Girl killed by in-laws over dowry”. We didn’t even ask or take a single item from the girl`s family. I didn’t say anything to parents for they didn’t listen to me earlier and I wanted to kill myself, but couldn’t out of love for my parents. I would also take my food where I was alone and chuck it to the street dogs or in the bin, only having 3 roti each day. In three days, my life was destroyed. I prayed to him, who knows everything and asked for his help. We went to girl`s house and lived there for a week, girl slept with her mom all days and we slept on the floor, while her family sleep on beds. I talk to her parents about her behaviour and her dad says “Do not tell your parents, we will talk to her”. When we come back to our house, girl says “If you tell anyone about all this, the consequences will be very bad for you and your family”. I was completely destroyed and prayed to god to save us all from this mess. Her file was sent to immigration with the wrong draft, my dad had the correct draft amount but no one listened to him. Since we were to move back to our country, we had given address of girl on visa application. The file got rejected and vichola said can you give correct amount and post the file. He sent the file to us and sorry for language, that fkin took the draft money my dad paid for the application. I told my dad to not send the file until I say. He said why, but I didn’t say anything. We came back and I told my parents everything, blaming them both for what happened. I said you didn’t listen to me and put me in this mess, maybe if you listened to me, instead of arguing and scolding, I might have told you earlier. However, god saved us all and I hope I can become a better person and a better sikh. I suffered for 5 weeks, not able to say anything and fearing for my family`s safety. That vichola fker didn’t tell us: - Girl had epilepsy and she becomes unconscious - She was taking medicines, which I saw in her purse - He propose this alliance so she could get a visa, fk those filthy pigs vichola, girl and her family. I hope they don’t even get a place in hell. - That she was married against her will. When we go back to our country, vichole also came because his son lived here and both father/son proposed this alliance. He came to our house and said “If you don’t bring the girl here, then the girl and her family can do anything in India”. Fkin threaten us, we told our lawyer who handled everything. After what happened, I think staying alone and not getting married is the best option. I cannot trust any person, let alone another girl. It will be too much if I have to go through this again, I might not survive the second time. However, I cannot forget how our master protected me and stopping me from harming myself. I am now much better than before and am happy, having regained the weight that I lost while in India (more than 5kg) and stopped taking anxiety tablet doctor prescribed me. People say foreigners get married in India and leave the girls, what about people like us??? Please post this on other forums so any brother/ sister going to India to get married knows of the dangers.
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