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Sat sri akaal. I am punjabi sikh. I always topped in class went to best college and got best job. I get really a good punjabi girl who was punjabi but pure heart. I treat all well and thought I only had moh not ehnkaar. I recited sukhmani sahib daily After 3 months of marriage me and my wife had severe accident. She got head injury my bloodviens were ruptured both of us see death and after long time we recovered with effects. I became amritdhari this year. But part of me was angry with God. Now I again become complicated with urinary problems and wad tested positive for hcv. Had to be operated with 50 percent chances of success. My amrit was stopped as my hair of body were cut. I blamed God and become tensed. My tension lead to my wife loosing hearing of one ear. And we are living apart I love her too much. My misfortune grows so I started to think of either jumping in river or hanging myself but I don't garner strength to do it. Only now I realised that I had ehnkaar all of my life and when I know it I cried a lot. And recite sukhmani sahib again. The problem is I am not afraid of death but my mom for my wife is not allowing me to live in peace as I am responsible for all her pain. Please guide me how to minimise moh to my wife and accept death separation as true reality. Even thought of living dying without her is unbearable. How to control moh. Please please. Really need advice. Has anyone has such experience?