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Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh This will sound quite petty to most people but I'm sure some kaurs can relate. I'm nineteen years old, I took amrit when I was fourteen and I tie a dastar and have always been strict with my rehat. However, I've begun to struggle. While I still religiously get up to do my nitnem and am strict on what I consume, what music I listen to etc., I'm struggling with bana. I love my dastar, but I'm falling back into my old ways of wanting to wear quirky jewellery and accessories and nail polish. I'm an artist so I am heavily pulled towards self expression, and the people I spend time with encourage me to do this, and I can't stop spending time with them because I'm at uni with them. This sounds petty, but for those of you who have been strict with your rehit and bana, you'll understand how desperately I want to keep my rehat, but I also want to express myself outwardly, not just as a sikh, but as myself, unique. I would very much appreciate any ideas, words of wisdom or little faith boosting comments from any sisters. Sorry if this sounds petty, but I want to feel expressive, unique, happy and free without giving up my rehat.