Sat Siri Akal Ji
I completely relate to your questions having gone through them myself last year. I remember staying up all night immersing myself in Sikhi too! Trust your intuition, it comes from the Infinite and I believe children remember the Infinite a bit better than we remember as adults. It's true that tying on that turban will help you live the life, live the Dharma and give so many other gifts to you. You are just acknowledging who you already are and what you already know. Nobody else gives you permission to be you or to say you are a Sikh of the Guru. When you step forward yourself in courage and faith the Guru will take your hand and carry you.
I went through some rough times with my family and you will probably have some tests. It will be ok. Just keep being your beautiful self, connecting to the Guru and listening to those wonderful children!
Blessings to you and welcome sister!
