Questioner

Every one of us needs to make our own ethical decisions rather than going with the status quo. This includes not wearing clothes which are made from animals, not using products experimented on animals, and so on. Don't assume that all Sikhs are ignorant to this and just go along wearing or eating what they like.

Yes, simran is exceptionally important and I know it will carry me through. But my question still stands. Is there anyone here who has knowledge of Chandi Di Vaar??

Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh, I feel I need a great amount of mental and spiritual strength to develop and get through the days, where I face many challenges. I'm turning to Chandi Di Vaar, having heard that this bani will provide me with that strong mentality. However, reading the translations, I do not understand it. I do not understand its meaning; I am trying to relate the battle to that of the mind and the panj chor, but I do not know if this is at all correct. Can somebody please explain to me? Can I read Chandi Di Vaar without understanding it? It feels like pakhand if I do.

Vaheguru jee, We all say Ardaas every day. However, when said in sangat I never know what to say in the personal part. Especially as my Punjabi isn't great, by myself I say what I want of course but in sangat it seems people have a set thing to say (eg. please keep us in good sangat, help us with Amrit vela, etc). I know some Gutke Sahibs include this within them. Where can I read one of these so I get a better idea of what to say?

Think you guys are missing the point of the question. Being born into a Sikh family does not make you a Sikh; many born under the label may call themselves atheists or adopt views that fly in the face of Sikhi. Still, when it comes to the Anand Karaj - which many non-Sikhs or unbelievers may choose to take part in for traditional reasons or to appease family - no Sikh protests or bats an eyelid. I think this is just as anti-Gurmat as those weddings which some have crashed. I have many family members who do not care for Sikhi, yet of course they all had an Anand Karaj - just as they visit the Gurdwara, for social or cultural reasons. Isn't that messed up? No? Because they were "born into Sikhi," their beliefs and behaviours are not a problem? Also, OP, no - women get more stick for marrying outside of religion than men do. This is how men exert power over women. Disclaimer: before anyone decides to jump down my throat, I do not even agree with non Gursikhs (Sikhs actually on the path) having Anand Karaj. Just hate the double standards.

This is what I wanted to say. But you know that it's hypocritical; the problem here is not that you can't see that. It's that you need to let go of an unreasonable expectation/ desire. Ultimately, such desires are simply a reflection of your own ego/ pride. Need to gradually become more detached from that ego (through naam simran, seva, continuous contemplation) and your perception of the situation will begin to change. Ultimately you will love her unconditionally for the being that she is; a love that is not dependent on something she did or did not do in the past. Don't let yourself sabotage something good. Your ego does that to you. Unless, of course, you will be one of those males who will latch on to this for the rest of your lives. In which case, let her go - she doesn't deserve that.

Thanks but not for android, for the laptop? Somebody come to my aid pleaaaase

Gurfateh sangat ji, I'm a bit of a newbie at this, How can I download Sikhi To the Max so that I can search and use the powerpoints for kirtans etc? I've tried downloading it from here http://www.sikhitothemax.com/updates.htm but it doesn't work. Says 404 - File or directory not found. ALSO - if I can't download that, is there a similar system I can download? Thank you

Brother, Love is not dependent on prior conditions, or on selfish personal preferences and desires.

Yes. A loving parent wants to do the best for their child, to a Gursikh the best is guiding them to Guru's sharan.

Vah, vah. That is rather beautiful.

Oh man I wish I knew. I know nothing past the previous couple of generations, and neither does anyone else.

I think most of us are like this to an extent. My own self reflection has taught me that such jealousy comes from deep insecurity, whereby one tries to seek validation or happiness from others. In reality, we are completely whole, we are one and the same. A deep understanding of your Self and an understanding of your wholeness, and your essential likeness with everyone around you... that should change things.

There must me somebody who has links to these Singhs. It's usually pretty easy to get in touch, don't know if anyone's making the effort though. This needs a panthic response, it shouldn't be ignored.

I can't see the video, but I'm guessing you're talking about Sikhs slapping up the wandering Hindu ascetic? If not, ignore this post! I was disgusted when I saw that video. And I mean, so disgusted I couldn't sleep that night. It is painful to see the protectors become the oppressors. Since when is it part of our dharam to hurt another unless in self defense or defense of the weak? They were beating up a holy man, part of a long standing tradition which Sikhs may not agree with but should respect. I saw beating and heard shouting, not the sweet words, humility and pyar that a Gursikh should have. I honestly feel disgusted that Singhs would do this on the basis of what they find to be appropriate or inappropriate clothing. Is this beating-people-up thing becoming a trend in India? Gone are the days when the Singhs would protect the weak and offer love to all that's how it feels. I really do hope that somebody contacts these, and any others doing this, and explains things to them to prevent them or others doing this again in the name of Sikhi.

Dearest paaji, What takes true courage is a Singh or Singhni following Rehat to the core in this society. A Singh or Singhni who stands by Gurmat values despite what the world may think or say. Assimilating, saying dirty things and trying to convince the world that Sikhs are just like everybody else does not take the same courage that it takes to be a Gursikh.

My grandmother has moved in with us and my room is currently being done where she will sleep. In the meantime she keeps her gutke in the living room, where people eat meat right next to them. She's sat on them, put them on the sofa, table... been trying to do tell her how to treat them for ages, but out of stubbornness she ignores me, not liking being told what to do. My mother also wouldn't let me take them away for fear of upsetting here. Finally, been able to come to an arrangements whereby I take them away and bring them to her when she needs them. But I just found one fallen on floor between a sofa and chair, it must have been there for days. I feel so so so terrible, like awful. Like I need to beg for forgiveness. WHAT DO I DO? It's driving me crazy having to police this. On top of that, we keep getting wedding cards with gurbani in them which are just left around as well.. What do I do when I find gurbani being disrespected? Paath? How do I ask for forgiveness?

Poor lady, so sad.

Ya'll crazy! All that simran some of you do, I feel like a bit of a fail now.

Listen to this wise soul!

See I don't feel that somebody is a Sikh unless they make a conscious effort to accept Sikhi to some degree... I don't think being born into Sikhi cuts it, it's like being born into a family of accountants and claiming to be an accountant. A real Sikh should marry another Sikh, of course. Too be honest jee this I'm coming from my experience as an ex-Punjabi non-Sikh girl who didn't know anything about Sikhi, I can totally understand the mindset of the girls you criticise and I can see how unfair it is to do so.

For what reason should she feel ashamed? She married a non-Sikh, but did she ever know anything about Sikhi? No? So why are we angry at her? Not everyone has the luxury of being taught about Sikhi growing up. You guys need to consider this. They do not consider themselves Sikhs to begin with, they are just normal people, and so marrying any other person is perfectly acceptable. Why are we blaming her for that? Imagine girls reading these posts. Men being quite nasty about a sister they know very little about. What would they think about Singhs? And about Sikhi? The problem is the lack of education or whatever else, and it will NOT get anywhere near to being fixed through judgement and slander. Endlessly blaming girls rather than understanding and isolating the problems is more ignorant.

Campaign? Educate ourselves? Make a difference? Nah too much effort, we'd rather sit on the internet and complain. :lol2: I hope this lady doesn't find this thread and read these horribly judgemental posts.

No not offended at all, these cultural norms are prevalent here too! With regards to meat, I think most Sikhs would say that even eating fish is not OK- it's regarding as a sentient being, intelligent or not, and taking its life for your stomach isn't considered okay. Well by orthodox Sikhs, I meant those who are actually following Sikhism to the T, and that usually infers amritdhari (baptised) Sikhs. They are the Sikhs of the Khalsa who follow of this strictly. However, outside of that, there are people who may not practice or may practice only aspects. I'm sure it's the same with all religious communities!

Well, if I were to simply say "Sikhs do this" then I'd probably be a) criticised for making a sweeping statement by those Sikhs who do cut their hair, or b) questioned as to why so many Sikhs then cut their hair. Can't really win no matter what you say yo.