Ranjeet01

https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2007/10/in_economic_terms_you_are_a_de.html

There must be a certain level of insecurity muslims have in order to smash an idol. This comes when your base ideology is based on power and dominance. They do montheism the wrong, follow our way the Sikh way, it is much better.

The Karanveer fella is a typical American hustler. What I notice is about Americans of all persuasions is that they have that goofy look on their faces. Their bug eyes and those shiny straight horselike teeth. Even US Sikhs (born and raised) have that look. You can spot them a mile away. That Rubin Singh looks like that Manchester Singh conman Rueben Singh of Miss Attitude fame (wonder whatever happened to him). Yes he is a one-tenth consultant alright. He leaves you with one-tenth of your earnings.

They look like grifters to me. They have a hustle on.

I never said that there aren't good women. You miss the point completely.

It is done so that you don't offend anyone. The minute one relative and you leave out another relative, you will be accused of picking favourites. I saw something that may start to get popular. I had a relative that passed away abroad. Because of covid-19 and the fact that funeral being the next day , a lot of people could not attend. However, I saw the funeral on live stream. I think this could be the future. I think with weddings that could happen. If you got a cousin who is getting married in the UK, and you have relatives all over the world, you send a link and watch the Anand Karaj. People send invites on whatsapp or whatever other social media platform these days. I think this maybe the way forward

It is an observation. What you will also notice the traditional gurdwara has three exits, one at the back behind Maharaj and two on the side. Because Maharaj tends to be more centrally located people will matha tek not once at the front but go towards the matha tek behind Maharaj and matha tek again. There is more space to manoeuvre. In the west, it looks odd. In Punjab and in India (you will notice on the program on TV of Harimandir Sahib), you notice people sitting in front, behind and around the sides.

These weddings are like Royal Ascot for our ladies. It is just one giant peacock show. If they could get away with hats and tiaras they would. The Anand Karaj traditionally did not have a lot of people and most of the people who go to them would rather be at the reception. I think what has happened is that typically in the west the darbar hall is a much bigger. In Punjabi typically they have never been that large. I think (my wacky theory), our gurdwarae in the west have inadvertently have taken the design of the church. The darbar hall become long and rectangular like a church hall with Maharaj being right at the end of the darbar hall like a church alter. This has made the Anand Karaj into a Church Wedding Service and you try to fill in as many people in as possible. The only reason a lot of people come is for the chat and mithai. Most darbar halls in Punjab and probably rest of India are more square in shape and Maharaj tends to be more centrally located. I think darbar hall for anand karaj's should be much smaller (which with many gurdwarae who have extra halls, they generally are) but they should may limit the number of people (with Covid-19 this maybe the case). They need to cut back on those speakers (they are completely irrelevant) Also do we need ragis at the Anand Karaj? Most Anand Karajs traditionally in Punjab never had them, it seems to be another western invention. Another western invention is the brothers helping the bride. Is there a reason for this? Typically an Anand Karaj should last 15-20 minutes not over 2 hours.

Karma will kick Turkey on the back side when the Kurds take their independence and break up that country.

We need to stick to our principles and stand our ground. We must ensure that our Sikhi does not become like this

There is a infantileness about our people. They seem to be into their extended adolesence even into their thirties and forties. This is the age to take on more responsibility and to show more maturity but they expect their parents in their 60's and 70's to do all the mature stuff. Normally, there is a right of passage but it does not seem to be there.

I really think that it needs to be spelt out before what is acceptable in an Anand Karaj. If our lot want to be goreh then at least they could follow suit and have a rehearsal so at least know what an Anand Karaj entails. The gurdwara could even charge for this rehearsal since they love making money. I got a better idea, for every putthah kam that the guests do like not wear proper attire or the chunni fall off the bun or round of applause, the gurdwara should fine the families by taking half the shugun money. That would make them behave better and act more respectfully.

A lot of Pakistanis have resentment against Gulf Arabs. The reason being is that they find them arrogant as they are not accepted as true muslims.

In the 60's, Afghanistan used to be very popular for hippies. They used to take one of those camper vans and travel across Europe and the middle east. I knew a Pakistani guy whose family used to drive to Pakistan from the UK back in 70's.

Here is another kicker. I don't think that the one in white is really a lesbian. There is a phenomenon amongst some women (especially in the US) where they cannot find a man for some reason and all of sudden discover they were lesbians all along.

Like I said before, one butch one and one feminine one. They replicate heterosexual couples.

What you are saying is NAWALT. Which is not all women are like that. However, I think that all women are like that, this is like basic default programming. It is just it impacts women to varying degrees and some women are able to act upon this and others aren't. It doesn't matter if the woman is religious or not, the hard wiring is there. All that might happen through socialisation and religion, the basic software and been overwritten with a software upgrade. However even a religious Amritdhari girl will chose There is truth in generalisations. Just because you may not see it in your direct sphere does not mean it does not exist. My experiences are based on a wider net than you realise.

Even in homosexual relationships they have a dominant and a submissive. They replicate male-female dynamic in heterosexual relationships.

How have I disrespected any woman or even hardworking women? You are deluded. If you are a male CEO, you can marry someone who is lower status to you. Like Bill Gates did with his wife Melinda Gates (she worked for him). If you are a female CEO, your pool diminishes because you want to marry someone of equal status or above. They want a winner, some one who is above them in status. They don't want someone below them. A female CEO would want a Jeff Bezos or an Elon Musk not the male head of marketing in her company.

There is a Clinical Psychologist called Dr Ramani Durvasala and she thinks that personality disorders are a Public Health Issue. In her opinion NPD is probably between 1 to 5 percent of the population. Narcissism could make up to 50 percent of the population. I discovered that someone closely related to me had Borderline Personality Disorder (I have heard of this, never knew what it was). When I go back to my childhood and I look back to all the aunties and uncles into the present day and they tortured their kids. I suspect Narcissistic traits are very common in our community particularly with our older generation, what they put their children through. Which is why there is growing number of 2nd generation and 3rd generation kids born in the UK having therapy and counselling.

The more butch one ??

Please don't use this "if you are bless to have a daughter" because this is putting women on a pedestal. The reality is that there are truths whether you like them or not. I would not like my daughter to dump some decent hard working guy for a richer guy just because he had more money and getting a higher status. But I know that when my daughter gets married she will look into how much the guy makes, what profession he is in, will her status increase, does he have his own house, does he make more than her. Please don't say this particular feature does not exist in a women's nature. Just because you may not act upon it does not mean it doesn't exist. I could bring you example after example said out of woman's mouth and her actions that someone can connect the dots. There a truths (unflattering) about men's nature which I don't find it offensive. Now should I say "I would should be blessed to have a son". Here is a reality about men's nature. There is part of men's nature that if a man could he would have unlimited sexual access to as many women as possible. The reality is that this is not possible for the majority of men. 90 per cent of men at least this is impossible. Here is another uncomfortable reality, you have more female ancestors than male ancestors and you know why? Because throughout human history, human's were never monogamous. 80 percent of men never bred with women because 20 percent of the top tier had access to all the women. Women sexually selected top tier men to have kids with. They shared their men with other women and they preferred that to having a low status man. That is how the institution of marriage came about with one woman to one man. There are truths about muslims nature which on another thread which a muslim probably finds offensive. We don't bat an eyelid because we know it is the truth. It is 2020, equality does not mean putting women on a pedestal. You want privilege. You are also displaying a behaviour as well that my bhuas directly from their mouths have told me which is unflattering about women and that is they never like to admit to their foibles.

How is it sexist? Do you actually know what is meant by this? Is it sexist because you do not what it means or is it some unflattering truth you are unwilling to accept?

For a while, I have suspected something not being quite right and you can see some of the signs but you would never realise it could be some kind of pathology. I am trying to understand what Sociopathy and psychopathy is, but it is not something I have fully grasped . One of the major factors that a lot of these pathologies have is a lack of empathy. It seems that there is an area of the brain that perhaps people with disorders may not have fully developed. Though I suspect that we have barely scratched the surface. At the moment, they have found about 4 types of narcissism, however I think that if there was more effort on psychologically profiling our people there would be probably double or triple the number of types of narcissism. I say this because our people are far more complex, sophisticated and psychological depths that the gorah does not.

I have been reading up about personality disorders. I think there are some serious issues in our community. I think (my opinion) that there could very well be a higher proportion of NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) in our people. There is a specific type of narcissism called "Covert Narcissism ". When you read about the particular traits in this type of narcissism you see recognise these traits in our women. It is quite an eye opener.