Dad'S Drunk

[Guest J Kaur]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki fatehh

I too am in the same situation as you .. its come to that point where i now think of it as Maharaj is Testing me to see how strong i am ,There are Many Saakia which test Gursikhs in many ways .... ive given up trying to help my dad ...I no i should help him but if it affecting my Jeevan i dont need that sangat ( sorry to sound harsh but thats how i feel about it now ) remember Guru Gobind Singh ji Maharaj is our Pita ji ....Just focus on your Jeevan and maharaj will do some kirpa

hope daas has been of some kind of help

Waheguru ji ka khalsa Waheguru ji ki fatehh !!!!!

[Trying to be Khalsa]

Waheguru Jee Kaa Khalsa, Waheguru Jee Kee Fateh

I have a problem ...I'm an amritdhari girl, and the only amritdhari in my family. I've been having problems with my father lately, he's been drinking way too much. He drinks a lot, and on top of that he does other drugs. He basically comes home everyday drunk and drugged. I've always had faith in Guru Sahib, that he can do anything and everything. I still have faith in Guru Sahib but like i feel that my dad will never stop drinking. I know i just contradicted myself because i said i have faith but then i said i dont. Its hard to explain, but i mean i know Guru Sahib can do anything, but its like i dont think he'll ever make my dad stop drinking. I feel really guilty for saying this, but thats just how i feel. I'm begginning to hate my dad. Everyday he comes home, and i just hate the look on his face. Everytime i ask him "are you drunk?" he lies to me and tells me "No, i'm not, even ask your mother" and my mom fully says that yeah he is. But he keeps lying. I dont know what to do! Ugh. I dont know. Sometimes i just feel like taking my keski off and go back to doing the stuff hes doing. Like if hes not going to stop then maybe if he sees me following his example, then he'll change himself. I dont want to do that, but i feel like, maybe i have too. And sorry if i havent been clear. And everytime me and my family try to talk to him about taking medication, he says "Mai bamaar nahi" (i'm not sick); when CLEARLY, he is! He's like mentally retarded when hes drunk. When he's sober, i love him and hes great. But when hes drunk, i rather not have a father than have one whos always drugged.

ANY ADVICE, TIPS, HELP would be greatly appreciated.

Waheguru Jee Kaa Khalsa, Waheguru Jee Kee Fateh.

BHENJI , I UNDERSTAND YOUR PROBLEM , KYONKI MEI BHI USSI HALAAT TO GUZAR KAR AA REHA HAA .

MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD HAS BEEN WASTED ON SEEING MY FATHER GETTING DRUNK AND RUINING PEACE AT HOME . TODAY , I AM 20 YEAR OLD ( MALE) , BUT EVEN TODAY , I CAN FEEL THAT THOSE DAYS HAVE LEFT A BAD IMPRESSION ON MY MIND .

THE FIRST TIME I SAW MY DAD DRINKING AND CAUSING PROBLEMS WAS WHEN I WAS IN JUNIOR K.G .

AND SINCE THEN , MY DAD HAS A DRINKING ATTACK AFTER EVERY 6 MONTHS OR SO WHEN HE STARTS DRINKING AS IF ALCOHOL IS IS HIS LIFE .

MY WISE MOTHER HAS ACTED LIKE A CEMENT IN THESE HARD SITUATIONS KEEPING 3 OF US TOGETHER .

OTHERWISE , MY DAD HAS PROVIDED ME WITH WHATEVER I ASK FOR . HE IS HARDWORKING AND A NICE MAN .

HE LOVES ME , BUT MY EXPERIENCE HAS INDEED ETCHED ON MY PSYCHE , WHICH WAHEGURU JI ONLY KNOW WHAT WILL LEAD ME TO .

GURU BHALA KARE , YOU ARE NOT ALONE .

KEEP YOUR DHARAM STEADFAST . GURU IS TAKING A TEST AND YOU WILL PASS , JUST HAVE FAITH ON DHAN DHAN GURU GOBIND SINGH JEE MAHARAJ . ALL UNIVERSE IS UNDER HIS CONTROL.

[Guest gupt]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa!Waheguru ji ka khalsa!

I am really agree with SunSingh ji .Our true father is lord and else will pass away.

Its also true that u should do u'r part of duties for your this janaam father but if u'r tired doing all and nothing works.Then its better to do paatha and ardaas for u'r father.U need to have patience.Doing paatha,sewa and ardaas is most greatest of all the work which will help u'r father.

NEVER THINK OF TAKING U'R KESKI OFF.

Life is full of problems.It doesn't mean that we surrender ourself to how life takes us and give up our sikhi.

Be stick to sikhi.Life di problems ahandi jaandi hai.Its not a big deal.But as we r human being we feel sometimes that with this thing our life ends etc etc.

In our home i have also seen alot similar problem than this i was just leaving hope ki hun sadi family vicha kabhi vi khusiya ahani hai shanti ahani hai.

But dear sare time ik jikan nahi honda.Kadi khushiya kadi gaam.Belive in god what will happen will happen for good.Don't take tension and never give up u'r sikhi.

SUKHA VELA SUKHARANA,

DUKHA VELA ARDAAS,

HAR VELA SIMRAN

"SATNAAM WAHEGURU"

Waheguru bhali karan.......

Bul chuk mafa!

[Guest unfortunate]

MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD HAS BEEN WASTED ON SEEING MY FATHER GETTING DRUNK AND RUINING PEACE AT HOME . BUT EVEN TODAY , I CAN FEEL THAT THOSE D

AYS HAVE LEFT A BAD IMPRESSION ON MY MIND .

Aww I hear you there. Some people, actually alot of people have it really bad, domestic violence etc. Its sucha tricky situation I honestly think the only thing to do is ardas. Although in SGGSJ we are told not to care alot about other people...everyone has the choice and to turn to gurbani and sikhi.

Oh yeh, go to a gurdwarra and ask them to do ardas for your dad, pay to have a paath for your dad, whatever it takes to make peace at home for your mum aswell, that's prob the best way!

[hkaurP]

Bhen Ji I have also been through this same situation. I am not an Amritdhari yet but still a devout Sikh and my dad used to drink all the time. Even while we would be making langar for the Guru Ghar. Matters worsen to such extent that he told us that he will divorce my mother and leave us and find another wife. Our whole family was at the edge of splitting up but then my father had a massive heart attack from which there was only a 10% chance of surviving. He survived with Waheguru Ji's meher but he has short time memory problems. He's normal for most of the time but he never remembers anything. Even though I am always in pain seeing my dad like this, to some extent it was much better than him drinking. So Waheguru Ji always helps out. It may be now or later. So like Veerji above said don't feel alone there are many other people that go through this but keep strength and Waheguru Ji will keep holding on to you.