proud_to_be_singhni

Jaspaul pajee> why is 'picky' even an issue...if we take a look at msj's post its all abput how much do we love our sikhi. Whats the real point of talking big about sikh issues, our shaheeds, lets take this one point forward.. When I see singhs shouting and giving jaikaraas in events and camps..my mind really tunes off...why?..... because they don't want to really know any body that is not cool.. that is not at least partly or all pretty that is not marriage material Forgetting the fact that giving the other person half the chance they may learn so much about them....Guru ji says dont judge...... and we judge the most....All this pajee and to anyone else reading is so sad for sikhi....and because im a recent amritdhari quite plainly distressing, which I never show or maybe doing my banis Guru ji keeps me living with my head up. Vaheguroo bhalla karan mein hor ke kavan...what can be done. Most likely they're be a large group of singhnees like me in the future..not married...whilst the singhs will stare and say hunn? look they arent even gristhee...who cares what they'll say??sure ..... before you ask>...would you care? and would it not even mildy depress and hurt you.

my take on the replies...waiting been good.... for sikh supreme paji>...forming friendships, cool but do you not think it is going towarfds the bf/gf side.... and to put it bluntly ....not many become friends like that close anyway..its more of what cna i get out of ths person?..(sad but true), do they know others? and if they are a 'loner' like me.....Dont stand a chance. msj>..I agree with the reply. Once they got past the looks, how many of these so called singhs/some singhnees even who treat the other also the same way...learn what this persons jeevan is like. How we can grow to strenth in our sikhi jeevan and come closer to vaheguru with each others support. khalsaforever> they were all amritdhari gursikhs. Just been discussing with my mum too after the latest turn down...her input...> In her time things weren't so ask this ask that and everything used to work perfectly...take a look at all of our rents........ ......and how can a person ever find a 'perfect' person, that ideal does not really exist...you may think it does with someone till you get marrid and then you see the faults. Wheras the person who think is quite plain/boring..after marriage ends up also being your bestest friend for a happier life togther. aaaandd...she goes the girls side were usually the ones to ask such and such quesitons coz they are giving away the girl....and these days the girls accept easily (most anyway) and the guys seem to have 110.1 issues. Nice thoughts mum...thanx.. :TH:

Just waiting whether any one does know...seems like no one does so far. Be back later..its such a issue for me and many others that I'm feeling very lost and doubtful of any chance of marriage any time soon since discovering what is happening...which I never expected.... This amritdhari life to me was one of happiness and clarity..... Hopefully after some replies it will become clear.

For a while I have been thinking and trying to understand the real issues faced by young marriageable age singh/singhness today. Drawing from personal experience and its unpleasentness to reading from others blogs and talking with some others online. What i see and hear is the singh brothers complaining we can not find a marriage partner because no girl prefers a bearded singh, she wants a prize husband. Okay.....so I was feeling sorry for these bro's....until my own marriage search started more properly this year by my parents and so far the boys.....proper long dhari/kes singhs....looking so in love with the sikhi saroop....Are complaining for every little thing wrong with the girl/singhnee..... A few examples of why I have been turned down in the past 4/5 months.... 1. She's shorter than me (like duh......how tall do u want me to be...I am 5'4'')...An excuse...hmmm.... 2. She is not as educated as me....(okaay....on to university and ??) 3. She wears specs (and.......) 4. She wears a distaar...'vahegurrooooooo?? 5. She lives too far (are you moving or me?) 6. She looks younger than her age (not a good thing??.... :wub: @ ....okaaayy) 7. She has a hairy toe (okaay...and hows your toe today?) 8. She has a moustachee (what do you want me to do about it....a kurehit....??) Seems like the singhs need to sort out why marriage takes place....and what the basic principles of sikh dharma is. What more can I say about this. Its a emotional and hard subject for any girl. in a sikh marriage......first comes a persons Spirituality/Saroop/Living according to the Guru's Hukum.... and then maybe personality/looks and etc. Why have gursikhs become so choosy.....I don't understand it. Someone please shed some light on this subject. From your very confused penji. :mellow:

hmmm.... I'm not married yet so porbably not the best person to answer oyur question, another maybe married bibi can share more on this. My take on the situation, after a giurl is married to adjust in her new life she should consider her husbands parents as dear as her own and they too of her as they would love their own daughter. otherwise theres so much tension and unnescessary quarreling that goes on. Your family may actually be lucky the way things are going.... Guru willing it will be even more pyar. I suggest penji that you have a ltlle heart to heart with your mum too...just so to let her know how you are feeling. Mothers always are there to listen even when we think they aren't paying enough attention as we'd like. Timing is everything. Vaheguru keep all you guys happy. :TH: best of luck.

hmmm.... I'm not married yet so porbably not the best person to answer oyur question, another maybe married bibi can share more on this. My take on the situation, after a giurl is married to adjust in her new life she should consider her husbands parents as dear as her own and they too of her as they would love their own daughter. otherwise theres so much tension and unnescessary quarreling that goes on. Your family may actually be lucky the way things are going.... Guru willing it will be even more pyar. I suggest penji that you have a ltlle heart to heart with your mum too...just so to let her know how you are feeling. Mothers always are there to listen even when we think they aren't paying enough attention as we'd like. Timing is everything. Vaheguru keep all you guys happy. :TH: best of luck.

Altering the natural state of the hair, yeh it is forcefully coz, i used to bleach and your hair need to be covered with it and done like every month or so, and so its a big hassle for the hairs naturalness.....! Thats one point..... any body else care to jump in with a view?...

Vahegurrooooo.... I really feel the hurt too bro and I think all of us do, hmm....what can be done, obviously Education is needed...Ardas is needed! The ones who do this don't seem to realise the impact of what they are doing and may have no fear of God inside themselves. Vaheguru bhalla karan

thanx bro :wub: .....awwww

donn even get me started about bosss camp!!! if nething goin gthere after i took amrit nearly made me feel like i was the most unloved sikh in the whole world and doubt my amrit so much because no one even gave a single moment to me or clear my quesitions. after the experience i forgot it, learned from it and then grew in my sikhi...to this self condfident daughter of Guru Sahib.>>.so in....conlcuision...It did help with much discomfort :TH:

Penji, Vaheguru ji ka khalsa...Vaheguru ji ki fateh Firstly you're not weak, no daughter of Guru Sahib is. This is a tough moment in your life and believe me in some parts we've all been there, it may sound like ..oh yeh...not this bad... I understand, everyone does tend to think i have got it the worst, this is lifes ups and downs. Youve allowed your mind to believe that you are a failure and therefore the heart has accepted it. If on the other hand you say each and every day....I Am Smart, I am going somewhere In life, I am a beuatiful preson (dont care what others think), Youre bestest friend and everyone elses too is Guru maharaj ji. Go Gurdwara Sahib and share your thoughts with Guru JI, listen whta Guru ji is saying in the hukumnama daily.... start slowly, do just simran or seva....Penji I am sure you'll feel a lot better. Balwinder kaur penji's advice is also right and Baljivan as well, take their advice too. From your sis, Amandeep Kaur Khalsa..Best Of Luck! :lol:

awwww... ..........wicked poem bro. :TH: btw. link dont work...admin will sort it out I hope...lol... :cool:

Presten hey..hmmm... right. cya...lol......dont worry me not goin right this minute. Be sure il be there tomrow though. what the man look like..he sure isno giani..forget! that title take care younger penji. dont worry bout anything..keep listening to bani and do ardas...guru jis there for you and everyone always.

I saw the keertan...beautiful...no idea bout ur questions. soz.

IM ALWAYS SUPPORTING GOOD OL ENGERLAAAND! Wish they get somewhere though this time round. COME ON! ARESENAL ALL THE WAY...... :lol: and THE THAMES VALLEY UNI GIRLS!!! YAYYYYYY!!!!!!! COME ON CRYSTAL!

Hey Bro! great to see your blog is ready..see my comment later on ur last post :TH: Agree. its a chance to tell the world about sikhs..debate constructively..if the youth don't go along and theres not enuf sikhs and too many others, usually are! then what bout our views!

Check this bros and penjis..received in email yesterday.....lets take the oppurtunity to do something for sikhi! Its a chance not to be missed. MARCH 27TH MINDFIELD presents “the discussion show that makes you think the unthinkable” Programme one is entitled: “MAKE ME BRITISH!” Has Multiculturalism in Britain has FAILED? By embracing other cultures, Britain has made the ultimate sacrifice & lost its own identity. It’s not culture - we love curry, bagels, Bollywood, rap & reggae. Is the problem religion? Do different faiths and what they represent divide our society? Should we KEEP GOD OUT OF BRITAIN? Whether you’re Christian, Muslim, Sikh, Buddhist, Jewish or Hindu – why not leave your God at home and embrace a Modern Unified Britain? BBC Three & October Films invite you to become an audience member and join the debate. After all, it is YOU we are talking about!!! Lets not let others just label sikhs as this or that...Make everyone know what we're all about!

???????!!! These days things just getting worse and worse. Shes such a beautiful little girl, hope Gurukirpa one day she becomes such a singhnee that all watching will fear her and adore her....Vaheguruuuuu!

Goodd!!!! Action taken..well done little sis, first step taken. Now leave it to your mum and anyone else. If need be: PM me ANYTIME........ IM PREPARED TO SORT THIS <banned word filter activated> OUT!!!! :lol:

Has anyone seen the recent new panjabi song from a well known artist , forgot the guys name... basic lyrics... NAA MAARI NA.....NO DONT DO IT, NO.... guys singing about this young woman about to have a abortion but as she doesnt want what her husband wants she decides to kill herself and the unborn girl, its a very sad video but really hits home....and i can see some women will be in tears after it. The girl ends up becoming a gradute in medicine at end of vid and mum looks on happily, showing how she'll make it in her life and can do as well as anyone. media influence such as that is needed, songs whatever hit people bigger than anything else.

What the HELL has that got to do with this topic, such a waste of space! and singhni ji GO ON!!! :TH:

:lol: @ ...... vaheguru.... !!!!

Hor birha sab dhat hae jablag Sahib preet na hoye Except the love one professes for the Lord, all other loves are unstable

To my bhens (esp the anonymous ones!) Sisters on marital issues you should try and PM bhenjees, this probably isn't the place to leave your upmost personal issues which largely....Remain Unresolved or argued about by 14 or 15 year old boys who may not have the correct advice...eg..check gupt section whenever you want:lol:.........! Also saying I'm of marrying age etc etc isn't going to automatically help you get a ristha here, blunt, but true. Lately a large majority of amitdhari singhs are marrying pathit singhnees (who do fashion, cut eyebrows, look pretty), some not even amritdhari "yet" and then tell their singhni sisters on the other hand there are many singh brothers out there who wanna marry a natural singhnee.....just plain double standards. So why rely on advice from singhs?? Not Everyone is the same but some delicate issues are just better advised by someone who knows and Can give Honest feedback! And..Put Your Faith In Vaheguru Jee Stay StronG! :TH:

lolllll...too right! me same boat sister...but I dropped out once..hehhehhee! Im getting a First for definate :cool: