MisterrSingh

Bro, sometimes we go through these phases when things don't click as they once did or as we hope they should. From experience all I can say is ride it out. Don't lose heart. We're Sikhs! We keep our heads up even in the most trying of circumstances. Keep smiling, keep with your faith in Waheguru, and don't let the weight of your situation crush your spirit. Nobody will come along and make you feel better; it all comes from within you.

The Force is in you, young padewan, but you are not a Jedi yet.

Not in every case as you know, but i appreciate your point. Why not be honest and say, "I don't want to settle down with a Sikh guy" instead of coming out with the line about intelligent and respectful Sikh guys? Because I can easily say there's a complete dearth of intelligent and respectful Sikh girls, but oh, that would make me a misogynist, lol. Morals and principles aside, do Sikh girls know anything aside from the little world they inhabit inside their own heads? When was the last time you met a Sikh female who was capable of holding a conversation about politics, literature, music (not Bhangra fgs), philosophy? I haven't, and that's even after coming across those with multiple degrees. Of course, I don't expect a full and frank appraisal of Nietzsche every time we settle down to eat dinner, lol, but something a bit challenging and thoughtful between the ears wouldn't go amiss. Even a good heart with high morals would go far to meet those requirements. And then if one does happen to encounter such a fabled being, lol, what are the chances she has an inkling about Sikhi even in its most basic form? And I'm expected to live in close quarters day in and day out with such mind numbing infirmity for the rest of my life? That would be worse than any prison sentence a court could hand down. No thanks.

Translated as "I want a guy who I can lead around like a dog on a leash and doesn't question me about anything."

Is the Pinglewara institution in good hands since the Bhai Sahib who founded it passed away? That's a worthwhile place to send dasvand IMO.

@DTF - Salient points, brother, without a doubt. I'm just a bit cynical. I hope I'm proven wrong. It's too easy to get drawn into a negative state of mind when it comes to these issues I suppose. It's just that not many, if anybody, seems to be bucking these trends. In fact things seems to be getting progressively worse on all fronts.

You mean the ones who came to Guru Tegh Bahadhur Ji and pleaded for help? I've thought the same on the odd occasion, lol, but alas that's the difference between us lowly souls and those who have the light of God burning in them in ways we can't comprehend.

Let's keep the poor apes out of it, they've done nothing wrong.

It's annoying. Some do it out of habit than anything they truly believe. It's another sign that some aspects of our culture trump religion every time.

I agree with you, bro. I was just making a point.

Yup, can't be hypocritical when it comes to something like this. If we object to Sikh females marrying Muslims then we can't be silent when Sikh guys marry Muslim girls. The argument is " Well the kids will be Sikh." Lmao, have you seen the lily-livered state of Sikh males today? The phrase, "putting your foot down" is alien to most guys these days. I won't hold my breath in anticipation of the kids of these marriages adhering to Sikh tenets. Never say never, but the odds are stacked against such an occurrence.

Not yet at least. It doesn't take much of a leap from their current policies for them to change things in order to appeal to the mob. I don't think they'll ever be in a position to dictate policy - Conservatives, Labour, and the Lib Dems have carved out that business between them quite nicely - but UKIP are doing what I'd do if I were in that position and of their ideological leaning; start out gentle, don't make any outlandish commwnts (I mean really mental, unelectable stuff like "all brown people go home"), then if the pendulum swings the right way and power is obtained it's time to reveal their real face. That true face of UKIP has not been seen yet. There's been hints as to what lies behind the mask, but not the full reveal. Just my opinion.

I avoid being fed bull by the media and try to uncover as much of the impartial truth as possible, but voting UKIP, as a Sikh, is madness. I'm guessing there are certain issues on which they share common ground with certain Sikhs, but history has shown us that organisations such as these only truly reveal their hand and their intentions when they gain enough support and power to be beyond reproach. They aren't our friends - tbh neither are the other parties - but UKIP are BNP-lite in my opinion. At the moment they may seem like the plucky yet doddering upstart, feeling their way through the minefield of modern politics, going toe to toe with the big parties, but if they gain enough support things will not be good for anyone of an ethnic persuasion, particularly those of us who can be spotted from a mile away. There's something - ironically - rather oily about them I can't trust.

Exactly. The ethnicity isn't an issue. It's getting married and then living according to Sikhi that's the key. Well it's not even just about marriage; It's about conducting yourself in a way that gels with Sikh values. But even naturalised Punjabis fail on this front, so what chance anyone else?In my darker, quieter moments I sometimes wonder whether Muslims have the right idea when it comes to things. The whole sword of Damocles hanging over the head of their people when it comes to towing the line on these issues. Our lot have no sharam or fear to keep them in line. Spiritually, I know it's a complete dead end and I guess you could say it's completely antithetical to the spirit of the path our Gurus established. But when you look at our people, our declining numbers, I'm not sure whether something drastic should be done. However, I think we're 30 years too late for such action to be taken. In this climate of intense scrutiny, of almost maddeningly heightened political correctness, and the general arrogance and over confidence of our people in the West, it would be like swimming against the tide trying to change things. Things should've been nipped in the bud at the beginning. Instead we allowed matters to escalate. Well this is what we'll receive... and more.

Steady on, fellas! I'm all for doing things by the book, but some of these comments are mental. Hilarious but mental nonetheless, lol.

I attended a langar / bhog of relations of mine a few months ago. It was in a city I'd never been to prior to this one occasion, and a Sikh lady in her 20's is standing in the upcoming election. After the bhog the young lady is invited to the front and she asks the sangat to vote for her in the election. She tells us her name, and she says she'll work to get the sangat's voice heard. Then she leaves. I'm looking around wondering, "What party do you represent?!" Lol, she didn't even bother with that vital bit of info, the assumption being the sangat of that town would vote for her because she was an apni. I don't know, but to me that was a straight diss, lmao.

Just because it's not sacred to you (or me) doesn't mean it isn't sacred to many others. There'll come a time when Sikhi will also be 2000 years old, and how would you feel if someone from a new religion in the future said, "I'm surprised that some people believe in the Sikh scriptures from 2000 years ago." Learn to draw the line at loving your own faith and affording others the courtesy to love and follow theirs regardless of whether we agree with their doctrines or not, kinda like how our 9th Guru did.

I'm wary of the concept of love marriages in their entirety, doesn't matter who's involved, lol. Like I said before, neither is a cast-iron guarantee of clicking, but supporters of love unions seem to imply that their way is somehow purer and more romantically noble and has sprung from a genuine place (thus, by their reasoning, resulting in an indestructible bond that those who have "suffered" arranged marriages can never attain and understand because arranged marriages are somehow artificial and less valid). In my teens and early 20's I'll admit to holding opinions on marriage in opposition to my current stance. Then I realised life isn't a Disney film with a happy ending and people aren't one-dimensional caricatures. If huge swathes of non-Asians are waking up to the genuine pitfalls in modern relationship dynamics, why are vast numbers of our own - who model themselves on these non-Asians - clinging to outdated, romanticised notions with no or very little basis in reality? As for the heartfelt polemic from the poster with "Uzi" in their name, I'd be more inclined to place stock in their assertions if he or she wasn't of an Islamic leaning. Funny how it's easy to take the higher ground when you're the one with greater numbers isn't it? By that rationale when the Mughals came knocking on our doors back in the day we should have all embraced Islam because it is, after all, just another way of connecting to God. Laughable yet devious.

That's the point I was trying to make. Neither are guaranteed to work. But the manner in which people who endorse love marriages seem to behave is as if love unions are bulletproof and everlasting. They refuse to hear anything to the contrary in case it shatters their illusion on these matters.

This is brilliant! So what exactly happened though? How did everyone come together and sort this out? Can you imagine how made up the little kid must feel? To be made to feel so low and miserable by those idiots because of the religious path he was on, and then to have elders stand up for him when he needed it the most. That kind of ekta is what's needed. Excellent stuff.

Modern day jatha culture is a shadow of what is use to be in the past. The chief difference being there was always the unspoken understanding that the Panth comes before anything else; no Jatha or its spiritual leader, etc, was better or above any other jatha. It was just a different flavour of Sikhi, but like I said, the understanding was the Guru and the Panth was supreme, and that we are ALL brothers and sisters. Nowadays... where to begin, lol. Power, ego, status, wealth accumulation, inter-jatha politics, jatha vs jatha ideological struggles, the fighting of verbal wars via proxy between jatha followers... it's an unseemly mess. The biggest fault I've noticed is the bare hate. Just the hate and divisions is so strong, almost like we're different religions or something. That's even before we discuss what happens behind closed doors. As AkaliFauj alluded to there's weaving of myths and legends about the respective jathas leaders (usually to entice and recruit mystically curious youngsters), bowing to his now empty chair / gaddi / shoes... too much to describe. The unity, intelligence, and common sense has deserted those who have positions of authority in Sikhi. As for parents, just keep your head down and bide your time. No point in banging your head against a brick wall. We all know Sikh parents don't like being educated by their offspring, lol, so don't bother. If they're meant to see the light they will; if not that's their luck, or lack thereof.

How dare you ask such a silly question! They're all totally behind her. They don't want her to ruin her life by being stuck in a loveless, arranged marriage to someone of her cultural and religious background, because, as we all know, love marriages are totally not built on physical attraction, and the love between the two partners in such marriages never fades or wanes at all resulting in no divorces ever. It's a universal truth. And you're an extremist... a God-forsaken terrorist for attacking the beautiful couple on their special, magical day./sarcasm

Like Italian there's phrases and sayings in Panjabi that don't quite have the same impact when translated in English. I don't think it's being rude tbh, as long as there's not a deliberate effort to alienate a non-Panjabi speaker from the conversation. It's just a relaxing way to express yourself in the language of the old country, hehe.

I'll give you a detailed explanation in a few hours. I'm a bit tied up at the moment. BTW, I'm not against the concept of jathas. I just believe, as with most things in modern religious practices, they've been co-opted and corrupted from within so much so that they serve to weaken and destroy our faith as opposed to unite and bring us closer to Waheguru.