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  1. I am a uni student and have to decide my career path . What path should I do to seek guidance from Waheguru and make the right decision .
  2. Dear Sikhsangat. I've been in a terrible predicament for the past year, and it just seems to get worse every day. Before putting forth my question(s), I'd want to acknowledge a few significant facts: 1. I'm a Keshdari Singh and I only eat vegetarian food (I have not been baptized). 2. I pose a selfish enquiry (i.e., I have selfish motives). 3. Everything in my existence is unclear to me. I was raised in a typical family and have led a typical life. However, I'm now faced with a challenge that, if it's not fixed right away, would lead to my early and unavoidable demise. It has recently come to my attention that both scientists and clever people view religion as a coping strategy used by the weak or, more specifically, as a result of human weakness. I am unable to understand how some people with high IQs and exceptional talent can succeed in whatever they do without the aid of God. Mant do not refrain from swearing, wicked deeds, etc. This also holds true for evildoers who injure others, have killed countless people, yet continue to live peacefully.Genghis Khan, Stalin, Trump, and other tyrants are only a few examples (Castro, Pol pot). Why do these people choose not to learn about or remain in a relationship with God while continuing to live lives of wealth and intelligence that are above average? I'm not sure how a just deity could do something like this. Why do the powerful oppress the weak? My life has turned into a misery I can't even begin to describe. I feel as though I shouldn't be here. I frequently observe my peers doing dirty deeds and acting clever yet still get great grades. I'm just a hollow shell of the person I once was. But this one query has prevented me from making any progress whatsoever in life. My childhood is a dim memory of following the crowd and generally being stupid. Whenever I try to practise Sikhi, I see things like these and question whether a god actually exists. In life, I'm stumbling. Every corner will reveal surprises. I am an feeble person. Every endeavour I attempt in life—studying, using reasoning, etc.—fails. I'm not saying anything out of passion or in the heat of the moment, and I don't want to evoke sympathy or empathy, but because of my infantile nature, I might "end it all" since this life is intolerable and I can no longer go on living. This form is my only hope because the world is so incredibly overwhelming and terrible. I'll ask the same question again. Why would God give individuals a high IQ when he knows they won't believe in or obey him? Why wasn't I given this information if God is just and fair? This implies that there may not be a god and that life is unfair. Do the weak have anything to rely on? In life, everyone is intoxicated by something. I haven't been able to find anything that satisfies my need for an answer. I worry about unexpectedly leaving this existence.I feel out of place everywhere; some individuals enjoy learning, while some follow a philosophy, while others believe in something else entirely. What hope should I entertain? Please accept my sincere apologies. I appreciate your guidance. Help Khalsa ji if you can. My only hope is in you. I grew up in a normal household and have led a normal life. However, I am confronted with a problem that, if not resolved quickly, will result in my untimely and unavoidable death.It has recently come to my attention that scientists and intelligent people alike associate religion with the weak, or rather, as a coping mechanism due to human weakness. However, I cannot come to comprehend the fact that there are people who are very gifted with high IQ's who excel at everything without the need of God. They do not do simran, swear, do bad deeds, etc. This also applies to bad people who cause harm to others, have killed countless people, and yet continue to live in peace.Examples include, but are not limited to, Genghis Khan, Stalin, Trump, and dictators (Castro, Pol pot).Why is it that I have to learn about and stay with God but these people do not and still go on to live lives of riches and extraordinary IQ? I can't possibly fathom a just god doing this. Why do the strong trample on the weak? Every single day of my life has become a misery I cannot convey in words. I feel like I should not exist. I always see classmates doing the worst of the worst and still passing with high grades. I am merely an empty shill of what used to be a human being. But this one question has blocked me from progressing in life at all. My childhood is a distant memory consisting of me doing what others did and being stupid overall. Any time I try to follow Sikhi, I witness such events and wonder if there really is a god. I am flailing in life. Expect surprises at every turn.I am a degenerate. I always fail at everything in life; studies, logic, etc. I do not wish to draw pity nor empathy and am by no means saying anything based on emotions or the heat of the moment, but due to my childish nature, I may "end it all" as this life is unbearable and I can live no further. The world is so very daunting and terrifying that this form is my only hope. I will reiterate my question once more. Why does God provide people with a high IQ, knowing they are not going to believe or follow him? Why was I not provided with such knowledge if God is just and fair? This means that life is unfair and that there may be no god. Do the weak have anything to rely on? Everyone is drunk on something in life. Nothing has satisfied my desire for an answer to my question. I am afraid of suddenly leaving this world. I feel out of place everywhere, some people love studying, other adhere to a philosophy, some something, and others other things, what hope should I entertain? Please forgive me everything. Thank you for your help. Please help Khalsa ji. You are my only hope.
  3. Waheguru ji ka Khalsa Waheguru ji Ki Fateh I am a 20 year old girl living in Canada with my parents. A few years ago, we went to visit family back in India where I met my childhood bestfriend who I grew up playing with (they were our neighbors). When I came back to Canada, we started talking and became really close. When my parents found out I talk to him, they got extremely mad, threatened to kick me out of the house, and said I was gonna ruin their “izzat” in society. I don’t understand what I am doing wrong. I only lived in India for a few years of my life so how is this wrong? My dad says that everyone in same pind are siblings... but we are not related in any way, I am pretty sure my grandparents moved to this pind when they were younger from another place. I have been talking to him for 2 years now and we are each other’s happy place. I don’t know how I get my parents to understand, I have no one to talk to about this. Don’t know what to do. Just found this page, someone please help :(
  4. I'm kind of bamboozled over this, a childhood friend cut his hair because he felt he was being discriminated at work and not getting a promotion for wearing a phaag. He would be 42 and this left me a bit confused, does this really happen these days with all the wokeness going around or just a mid life crisis.
  5. I took amrit a few years ago and everything was going well until I started loosing track of my nitnem and started hanging with the wrong crowd. I still did not engage in any bujjar kurrehits such as beadabi of kesh, taking intoxicants, or kaam. However, I was not consistent with my nitnem. Last year I decided to stop wearking my kirpan since I felt like I was showing off when I wasn't really doing my nitnem, I was portraying my bana without the bani. Since then, i have changed a lot and have began to get on track, and focusing on the areas I have been lacking in. I constantly regret every that I should not have taken off my kirpan although I still wear all my other kakkars. I really want to stay true to the amrit I took however, with the decision I made I don't know what to do to? Do do ardaas for removing by kirpaan or are there different steps that must be taken?
  6. Really Sorry for engine this topic up! I am 17 years old. I took amrit at the age of 12 because I felt very connected with the guru at the time and i knew and I still know that the main objective in this life is to become jot Vich jot with waheguru, and the first step to doing so is Amrit for a Sikh, that's why I took it at an early age because I felt like I didn't want to waste my time as we don't know we are gonna die, anyway..it was going well till I was about 14/15, at 14/15 puberty hit and I felt more prone to 5 evils, I got involved with the wrong crowd, and The effect of this was I stopped doing my nitnem and Simran and alot of things...I pretty much gave up being an Amrit dhari for a while and then this girl came into the picture... loads of guys liked this girl and the fact that she wanted me over them was crazy for me at the time because I'd never experienced that before, at first I thought I was getting way ahead of myself because at te end of the day I was still an Amrit dhari and a sikh of the guru and as I hadn't done anything to break it apart from stopped doing my nitnem for a while I didn't want to risk doing something that bad, but then I got encouraged by my friends to go for it and well I did it and I gave into lust after that I got depressed becoz I knew what I did was wrong, but I felt shameful so I resisted going to the gurdwara and stuff and took of my kirpan n stuff of because I didnt feel worthy to wear em and I didn't know how to face guru ji, I spent about half a year being shameful and depressed and then I started to fix up after that and start praying and everyday since then I ask guru ji for forgiveness even till nw, I got rid of my old friends and made new ones, good ones and I focus on school more, since that girl didnt go to my school I never had to face her again and from there I just started trying to become religious again, everyday I wake up at 6 and do my 5 bani's and I ask mahraj for forgiveness for being so foolish. I know I'll never do something like that again but I don't know what do now, do I beed to take Amrit again? My patens don't know anything about this, how do I tell them I need to take Amrit again? What would I say to the punj piare? I'm so confused ... Has any1 ever been thru something like this? I can't tell me parents because I just can't, they won't be able to take it.. I'm truly sorry for bring up this topic but I need help I dont know how to feel or what to do!? Wjkk wjkf
  7. plz watch the below video. does it say we shud chant matho murari?
  8. Guest


    Hello, I am 21, since i was 15 my life has gone downhill. I am not a baptised Sikh. I have a rare skin disease which has left my back and other parts of my body heavily scarred and difficult to even look at. I broke my leg months before my GCSE exams and was bed ridden for months, even now my knee is not completely fine. I have OCD (not the fake ocd like you see in social media) where I have horrible intrusive thoughts 24/7 and I find it difficult to even do prayers. I have done prayers for the past year every day in the morning. I used to recite chaupai sahib but now can only listen as my intrusive thoughts say bad things about the Guru and Waheguru so I'm too ashamed to recite it, I also try to say thanks and ask for help from the Guru and Waheguru and I do Naam Simran and Mool Mantar. Things just keep getting worse. My 'manhood' is also below average. Due to all of these things adding up I've put on a lot of weight as I can't motivate myself to do anything and I feel so cursed. I cry most days and constantly think of suicide. I have tried asking for help on other forums but they all think I am a troll which just pushes me closer to ending it all. I will never be able to enjoy my life and do things a normal man would. things keep getting worse for me. I have been to Gurdwara's in India and have asked for help from the Guru and Sikh Saints. Nothing is helping. If anyone can explain why this is happening and the best way to rid myself of most of this I would be greatful. I know to be a Sikh you must accept Waheguru's decisions but I find it difficult as my life is falling apart. Please someone help. WJKK WJKF
  9. i am 18 years old, pursuing computer engineering in a well reputed college in mumbai. i have always had cool friends and supporting parents. but, i've never been a staunch believer in religion. i always find religion to be pointless, following what some person(s) said/wrote hundreds or thousands or years ago and having to follow their rules and the way they want us to lead our lives just doesn't seem right to me at all. i've been smoking weed since a year, and quite regularly. my grades are not affected by,and i've not been as irritable i was since a long time. i never intended to let my parents know about me smoking pot, but nowadays the paranoia associated with weed is taking over the better of me sometimes because of the guilt i feel hiding it from my parents. i have many friends who smoke weed and all of them are really nice people, so why should what i do in my personal life be associated with my morality?i really feel smoking weed isn't bad for me but i don't wanna live in hiding from my parents.i am a turbaned sikh and my parents are really good role models, just that i do not believe in the same things as me. is there any way i can come off to them and tell them about me smoking the jane?
  10. I was asked this question today when I was telling my brother about how we shouldn’t go to the Mandir and I couldn’t asnwer it.
  11. My husband is Amritdhaari Sikh and he is divorcing me after domestic violence and abuse .i still believed that my husband loved me I can't let go of the feeling of love towards him My husband is Amritdhaari Sikh and he is divorcing me after domestic violence and abuse and making false criminal charges on me just after 6 months of our marriage.. I was married here and came from India and was confined at home for 6 months..there were many daily instances of differential treatment with me and of abuse with me daily..i still believed that my husband loved me but after he put me through the most horrible situation, i still can't let go fo the feeling fo love towards him..everyone is saying I am saved by Waheguru but why do i still want to be with..i still want to talk to him once..i was thrown out of their house in a demeaning way and still i have feelings for him..why? What should i do...he has applied for divorce too and i dont want to divorce him..i love him truly and i have no one to go back to..my parents are not alive..am homeless in a foreign country..why did he do this to me after all this sikhi talk at his home and i was to take Amrit with him on this Baisakhi..why is this happening?
  12. I did post this yesterday however I am not sure whether it didn’t come through or the admins thought it was a joke or someone being silly and did not allow it. However I can assure you that albeit it sounds quite silly and quite yucky I am genuine asking this question to the cyber sangat for advise as I don’t know whether this scenario requires to be brought for peshi or not. There is two parts to this: I know this sounds silly and a little yucky but I tend to pick my nose regular as I get a build up (possibly because I have a lot of nostril hair) and many times when I pick my nose some nostril hair gets picked out with it. Is this wrong? Should I be more careful? Are there other amritdharis in my situation? Also I now have a regular tendency of keeping scraping my finger in the side of my nostril and feeling the long hairs inside the nostril and slowly keep doing this and this many times this ends up pulling out the nostril hair. Its become a habit whilst I’m watching a program; previously I used to twirl my moustache when watching a program however now I am doing this. I end up feeling bad. I don’t know whether sub-consciously I am aware of what I am doing, part of me thinks I do, part of me thinks this has become such a bad habit its become second nature. Do you think I need to go pesh? I am really confused but its really playing on my mind. I know the above may sound really silly and most probably laughable to some but I genuinely need some advice on this issue. Thank you.
  13. Dear Admins, Twice I have sent a post here in regards whether I need to go pesh, yes I agree it was little discriptive however I am posting in the gupt section to get some advice. Please can you tell me your reasons for not posting. I thought this was the whole point of a gupt section. I am thinking about this regular whether I have done something wrong or not and need some guidance because asking this guidance face to face is quite embarrassing. Thank you
  14. Guest

    Rishta problem

    So a rishti wali had given my mother a potential match for me to go a visit, the girl ticks all the boxes in what we are looking for, she is tall, pretty, educated and her family are quite well off. I went to meet her and the family along with my mother, father and two sisters and we thought the family came across nice, the mother of the daughter was a little over bearing but we just put it down to nerves, I had some "alone" time with the girl in the front room and I got to chat a little with her, she seems down to earth and is even more pretty in real life than on the photo, I must admit i do fancy her abit. after the meet up my mother told the girls mum that we will let them know in a few days time but before that will be doing some check, the girl mum looked abit taken aback that we wanted to do checks but agreed. anyway long story short, my mother has found out that the girl has an older sister that we were not told about and this sister has been gone from the family for over 10 years now. Apparently she has ran away from home and is own with a Muslim guy. The family hasn't seen her since but I'm not sure if this rishta is right? i do like the girl but it's strange that her sister ran off, why did she run off, what if the girl is like her sister, I find it worrying that the family of the girl didn't tell us about there other daughter when we asked how many siblings the girl had, they never mentioned the oldest sister. should we decline the rishta or should I give it the benefit of the doubt and go ahead with the rishta?
  15. You may find this strange and a little funny but just wanted some genuine guidance from mature cyber sangat. I at times pick my nose (I know sorry for yucky detail) and withit my nose hairs get pulled out - is this seen wrong for an amritdhari? Should I be more careful? What do others do or feel about this situation. My main issue is that before as a habit whilst watching something I would twearl my moustache, however for sometime I have been keep putting my finger in my nose and scraping the side of the nostril and thinking to pick my nose which then turns to feeling the long hairs inside my nostril and keep doing this and which at times end up the nostril hair gets pulled out. It's become a habit and now It would seem part of my sub conscience knows what I'm doing but it's like second nature and a habit that I forget I'm doing this. Do I need to go pesh for this, it has confused me, is nostril hair also included? thanks
  16. Guest


    My 'friend' started questioning my beliefs and it did annoy me. She is a strong Christian and is homophobic and doesn't like muslims because she said it says in the Quran that Muslims are told to kill Christians, anyway my other Sikh friend said that we believe that there is one god and there are different paths. She said "how can you believe that if there are different religions and one God, We believe in one god and thats Jesus" that really annoyed me because I am already doubting religion and she is making matters worse, please help me..I don't even know what I asking but its been disturbing me the whole time and has made me even more confused Sorry for my mistakes
  17. Guest

    How Do I Solve This Problem?

    Need help guyssssss! So i've been with this girl for about a year, im a baptised Sikh, she is not of Sikh faith. We;ve never physically had sex with each other or physically kissed each other on the lips etc. however we have hugged, felt each other etc. She understood that we would never cross the line of sex and kissing because it would be a bujjer kureit and would ultimately affect my Baptism. I want to know from you all whats the best way of staying away from these situations? I do feel bad that i get in these situations where it nearly leads to intercourse but we decide to stop because we dont want to mess up. This has happened twice now and i dont want it to happen for a 3rd time because i know ill end up breaking my rehat which is the last thing i want. The first time it happened i did sukhmani sahib and japji sahib and felt a lot better. However whenever im with her the situation gets out of hand which i dont want to carry on. i really need your help. Thank you
  18. I've heard time and time again that's its wrong for Sikhs to take pride in something we've done or achieved since its all "given from God." But then how can we be punished for our sins? How can we take responsibility for our sins but not our good deeds?
  19. Guest

    Confused And Lost

    I keep making same mistakes the hair mistakes incidents are in no order and did not post all the incidents as there too many I AM lost and sorry I dont ever want my hair cut bu my mind becomes lazy sometimes and this happens READ......................................1st incident there was a pimple on my nose and I took out the pimple and afterward thought did I just break a hair and I saw on my finger there was a broken hair....................... 2nd incident I was getting clothes out of my laundry and was bent down and saw a pulling of my hair I told to my self its ok and kept trying to find the clothing and later on saw a hair pulled in my kachera after that situation. ..................3rd one is where I was closing a window and I was using one hand and saw blinds hitting my arm hair i didnt care if my arm hair was pulled off............ I also make sure to tie my joora perfectly where I comb all the hair straight and if I while tying move a hair or grab a hair I restart the process and keep combing my hair till I get it perfect ..........another one is are you aloud to push your pagh kapra like less say if your dumalaa on your forhead is sticking out too much like the clothing part and you push wit your hanwid like a slap but not untill the cloth is stuck to your haead or moving your bunga back with your hand like pushing it are you allowed to do this or not. ARe you allowed to squeeze your joora when joora is done and tap from top of the joora so it goes down and doesnt look like a big and long........anotha one is me playing basketball having a knee brace when I run the hair on my leg might get pulled is that ok or when having a bar on my back for squats and you know the hair on your neck might get pulled is that ok...............PLease heLP ARE THESES BAJJAR KUREHITS I am so lost if I go pesh for these things then same mistakes are going to happen as sometimes your mind becomes lazy as you saw from my incidents and it doesnt care does that mean I have to keep peshing again and again please HELP
  20. Guest


    Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh This probably seems like a stupid question but it got me feeling really guilty. At uni we have coursework, some include take home pieces and online quizzes. For the online quizzes/tests and some coursework's we are meant to do them on our own. But me and my friends we usually do it as a group and help each other. This makes me feel really guilty, and makes me feel if i done something really bad. I know this is a stupid question, but its really annoying me and disturbing me. Everyone at in my class does this, am I doing something wrong ? But then i think, if some asks me for help then i would help them.
  21. Guest

    Sexual Abuse And Opinion

    Hi! I am 21 year old girl and I want to move out from my house. The reasons are my mom had a second marriage and my step-dad (never seen or know anything about my real father) raped me since the age of 7 I was not able to understand till the age of 12 what was happening all I knew was that I didn’t want him to hurt me further. Since my mom did night shifts but when she quit work one day I mustered up the courage to tell her what was happening, around the age of 11. She told me to keep quiet and the same happened again when she returned back to work. But it was worse because since I had told my mom about it and she literally did nothing other than scream at him once. So he continued his abuse openly now and then every week he would kick my mom out of bed and take me from my room and rape me once, twice, or thrice a week as he pleased. My mom would just sleep beside my little sister and watch it all happen in the same room. Somedays it hurt so bad I would get up naked walk in the house and look for ways to kill myself. I am the only child from the first marriage the other two children belong to him even they hate their father for all he has done to me. At the age of 18 when I thought I had hope to go off to university and get far from this horror he didn’t let that happen every time I had an exam in grade 12 he would wake me up and beat me make sure I wouldn’t sleep. I still somehow managed to get a good gpa but he didn’t let that happen. Said there were financial problems so I couldn’t go to university and neither did he let me save up or do any job. I wasn’t allowed to have more than one female friend or even stay after school 5 mins extra for help not allowed to socialize with any family. He isn’t worth calling a monster he has done way more beyond that I was staying in the house so maybe I can could encourage my mom but she isn’t willing to move on. One day it got soo out of hand my brother called the cops while he was beating and I reported him for domestic violence and then he broke that prohibition entered the house and beat my mom with my step-aunt. All this happened just in begining of 2015. I thought this would make my mom realize she isn’t weak she can be independent but all she does is chase him and thinks he will change or has changed I know he hasn’t. He will be able to enter the house in February again all my mother is after is money and what people will say. I cant take these suffocations further I don’t care how he made up fake stories about me wanting to live alone so I can be a <banned word filter activated> that’s what he calls me. I really don’t care if no indian will want to marry me. I just want to have happiness and live a normal life, I know it’ll be hard but I’m willing to work two jobs just to get away from this pain. The only thing is my guilt conscious of leaving my mother but if she doesn’t want help, how can I help her? Knowing she will push me into the same hole. Will God still punish me for leaving my mother or am I too selfish??
  22. who is this girl from dragons den is she sikh?
  23. Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji K Fateh I am a young, 19 year old amritdharee female. I am born and raised in a typical punjabi family, however, we all do paath and are well into learning about Sikhi. I am the only daughter in the family, I used to be the girl who was into her, makeup, hair styling(i've never cut my hair) and basically all the usual girly stuff a typical girl is interested in. From a young age I have been attending gurdwara, sikhi classes and doing kirtan on the vaja. In 2013, we had our annual dastar day, where I tied the dastar for the first time and I fell in love with it. When I told my parents that I was considering wearing the dastar full time, they weren't against the idea (both my brothers have worn a keski since birth but aren't amritdharee) but objected by saying it was just a phase I was going through and I would change my mind. I few months later, in January 2014, we had a jatha come for a week and on the last day they were holding an amrit sanchar. During the second last divan, something in what they were saying me touched me so much that, almost 12 hours before the amrit sanchar I decided to take amrit. I am someone who never in my life even considered the idea of taking amrit but I don't know why, but I just felt that I was ready and had to take the leap of faith. I felt sitting in the darbar sahib that night, it was either take it now or never. So next day, I take amrit. I AM THE ONLY AMRITDHAREE IN MY FAMILY AND EXTENDED FAMILY. Now almost year and a half on, I do my paath (timing is an issue - but something that can be worked on), follow my rehat, wear a dastar etc. The first full year, I was convinced fully, and also told others who asked me, that me taking amrit suddenly was the best decision ever and I would never look back, I feel so blessed to be on this path. HOWEVER, for the past few months my confidence has shattered. I can't stop my mind from falling weak to think that maybe I have made a quick decision- one which perhaps I should have thought about more carefully. I do my paath - I love doing paath, kirtan... I wouldn't be able to live without it... sikhi is my identity and one I'm so proud to be a part of BUT! My appearance.... I love my dastar but for the past few months I really miss the old me... the girl who was free spirited, carefree, girly,.. I MISS MY HAIR.. I MISS LETTING IT DOWN .. I WAS IN LOVE WITH MY HAIR!!! (I've never touched alcohol, cigarettes, drugs and I'm a strict vegetarian and have never entered a club apart from wedding functions with my family). I feel so weak when I say that I go to bed crying most nights these days because I feel so guilty that Mahraj knows what I'm wishing for.... to be free. I see other girls who are like the old me, who like to dance, wear makeup, style their hair etc but still keep intact with their sikhi, do their paath, learn about their dharam etc but aren't amrithdaree... I wish I took time to think about it and maybe today I wouldn't be sitting here crying whilst typing this up. My family and friends and my community are so proud of me for the step I took a year and a half ago but what do I do now??? I literally feel that I have no one to pour my heart out to that would understand what I am going through.... I talk to Mahraj about this but I feel like I'm trapped... no matter what I do I'll only bring badness... If i continue the way I am, I'll never be a good gursikh, and if i go back to the old me, I'll dishonour and bring shame to my family- HOW WOULD I FACE THE WORLD... I have never done anything wrong up till date and don't intend to. But when I look at my family, my sisters, my cousins, I see the old me in them- The happy me! I really need someone to advise me, I can no longer sit here with all this bottled inside me... I don't want to be depressed any more... PLEASE someone help me! Waheguru Ji ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji K Fateh!
  24. I almost have a six pack now but I am now thinking what was the point all this time? To impress the females? I am a bit confused now...
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