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Found 151 results

  1. Guest

    Unhappily married

    I am so unhappily married. My husband is very rude, selfish, lacks any compassion and his he has a lot of hankar. He comes from a broken family his parents are divorced and it shows, his communication and respect for anything I do or go through is so low- basically he isn’t appreciative or supportive even if I give birth or lose a loved one, he’s not there emotionally. He was shown no love as a child and he isn’t capable of showing love. I don’t want to divorce because it’s going to be tough on my kids and I do not want them ending up twisted like him and his siblings which are a product of divorce. I just feel like I am stuck. I am trying to keep up my sikhi, do Amrit vela, he does nothing so I feel even if I try to better myself and beat my krodh or ego he doesn’t do nothing changes. Am I meant to just accept this is my hukam based on my own karma and keep quiet and deal with it? It’s hard to even have a good mind myself when I am with someone who jus always provoking me.
  2. Waheguru ji ka Khalsa Waheguru ji Ki Fateh I am a 20 year old girl living in Canada with my parents. A few years ago, we went to visit family back in India where I met my childhood bestfriend who I grew up playing with (they were our neighbors). When I came back to Canada, we started talking and became really close. When my parents found out I talk to him, they got extremely mad, threatened to kick me out of the house, and said I was gonna ruin their “izzat” in society. I don’t understand what I am doing wrong. I only lived in India for a few years of my life so how is this wrong? My dad says that everyone in same pind are siblings... but we are not related in any way, I am pretty sure my grandparents moved to this pind when they were younger from another place. I have been talking to him for 2 years now and we are each other’s happy place. I don’t know how I get my parents to understand, I have no one to talk to about this. Don’t know what to do. Just found this page, someone please help :(
  3. Guest

    Any gursikh girls?

    Iam born in the uk, 32 years old, self employed living with parents. i am looking to get married, with a gursikh singhni whos first priority is sikhi and gurbani. But will happily live with my parents also and do their seva too. Send me a message if you or know anyone who is looking too
  4. Guest

    Matrimony

    Saw an advert for matrimonial website "Lavaan" on instagram. Is any one using it? First time I'd heard of it.
  5. Hi, This has probably been discussed before but it's something I can't really wrap my head around. I'm a singh with full beard and have cousins who are the same, we are finding it difficult to find Sikh girls as life partners. The ones I've been introduced to have a problem with me not cutting my beard and being vegetarian etc... few have asked me if I would cut my beard etc... this coming from supposedly Sikh girls and it's quite disgraceful. I've had more interest from girls who are not Sikh...i.e Gujarati, English girls etc.. who don't seem to care about me being a full singh, it's raising questions in my head about the future of Sikhi as a whole, our Sikh girls are moving away from our faith/traditions and adopting western values and ways above all. One of my cousins got fed up and cut his beard in the hopes to be more 'accepted', but I feel this is the wrong choice to make. I'd be lying if I said the thought didn't cross my mind but I don't want to move away from Sikhi just to find a wife, but it seems like our Sikh girls are. Suppose this is more of a rant than a question as such.
  6. Its been couple of years since my marriage. In this few years I have blessed by guru sahib with a cute lil son . With my not-so-much salary , and my mom a housewife , and an old weakened father on the brink of retirement , I am seriously beginning to wonder what to do ahead. My wife has completed her B.A (bachelor in arts), a degree traditionally believed to be of little value lol. It doesn't seem she's interested in pursuing higher education. She used to work in a shop before marriage as she hails from a rural , poor family. But she's passionate about one thing . Hairstyling and cosmetics . Infact, before she turned pregnant, she had a short training at local parlor , and from what I heard from her, even the owner lady of the parlor was very happy with her work, and often asking her to do more . However my concern is Is hair-styling/salon a respectable job. I have my reservations against it, because it kind of intermingles or on boundaries with other lesser respectable and shady areas like SPA (heard sex rackets happening there with 'special massage' lol ?) or bollywood celebrity make ups. yes the rotten t's into illicit sex and drugs. I being a closeted guy , and my wife not knowing about my sexuality, am deeply concerned about her spoiling if she started going out. I don't know how justified my fears are, but considering I live in mumbai which is like london of UK (my approx analogy). Its like right now I feel I want my wife to earn and be my support or atleast be independent woman on her own. I asked her don't give me your salary, keep it to yourself ,just want her to be independent, but at the same time I fear her being spoiled or someone locally who thinks I am gay spoiling her intentionally. you never know. Please advice
  7. Hi, Is anyone able to recommend sikhi matrimonial sites/apps as i'm struggling currently. Looking for Sehajdhari/Amritdhari women. I know Shaadi.com is taken the mick out of but has anyone used or would recommend? Thanks for any replies in advance.
  8. There doesn't appear to be any decent platforms for meeting people these days and no one seems willing to suggest people. Where are we supposed to begin?
  9. Guest

    Obtaining grist jeevan

    Wjkk wjkf Need some advice, I am NRI female in my 30s. After years of looking for Gursikh matches without success, my family and I decided to get ardaas done with keshdari Sikh. I didn’t know much bout him but figured him keeping his Kesh in Mona household reflected some level of respect and courage of sikhi. Planning our marriage, I have come to know more about him and how different our Sikh values really are (including knowing the fundamentals of basic Gurmukhi and gurbani). Question is how can couples grow together if they have differences in appetite to attain Gursikh jeevan? Is there a way to create a respectful harmony or am I dreaming? This is not a new issue I know, but would appreciate tips and learning from the couples on how they can bridge the gap to build a healthy relationship and hopefully align and merge on a Gursikh path? wjkk wjkf
  10. Waheguru ji ka khalsa, Waheguru ji ki fateh I am an amritdhari singh and I got married to an amritdhari dumala tying girl just 6 months ago. I consider myself a beginner in terms of sikhism and I got baptised just a year ago and still trying to adapt. However, I am always trying to be better sikh. Anyways, coming back to my marriage, first couple of months were great. However, after that, I got to know about my wife's previous relationship which ended few years ago as she said the guy was abusive and did not trust her. At that time, she was not baptised and the guy was a hindu. But the fact that she did not talked about this before our marriage has really left an impact on me. Even after she getting baptised, she used to talk <banned word filter activated> with some guys, although she says she was never with anyone physically after that relationship. This whole incident has affected me badly and now I am going through anxiety and depression. Every few days, I find a reason or go back in past and have arguments. It gets so bad that I keep thinking about ending my life. The fact that I married an amritdhari girl and then I learn about all this really makes me wonder what god has planned for me and what should I believe in anymore. Just yesterday, she was listening to some punjabi song that had alcohol reference and I told her to not listen to such songs but she said she can't change herself because of me and that if I wanted to control, I should have married someone else. Having said that, we both love each other very much, at least when I am not having anxiety attacks. But I don't know what to do now. It seems like we have different ideologies when it comes to sikhism even though we are both amritdhari. I can't get out of depression and keep going back in past and this is ruining my life and my marriage. No matter how much I try to live in present, somehow I end up in same painful spot. I don't want to be bad sikh, but I am really struggling and don't know what to do. I don't want to disclose her past to anyone in the family, so can't even talk to anyone. That's why I am here. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you so much.
  11. Guest

    Marrying nihang singhni

    Sat sri akal ji I am a sikh boy from punjab and now studying in germany. I have haircut. My only question is can I marry a nihang singhni ji. Please forgive me if I asked anything wrong. I really love our religion and want to marry a complete sikh girl and in future I will also become complete sikh but not now as I am a student rite now and can’t follow sikhism fully. Please advice me
  12. I am married to a man who takes all his emotions out on me, he is always hostile and angry. When I met him he told me his family were the problem, but now I have realised it is him, he treats me how he treated them, just always being rude, not a supportive bone in his body. He doesn’t want to change and never feels guilty for me always crying. He loves to drink again doesn’t want to stop even if that makes him more moody too. I wish I never married him, I feel so alone and stuck as I also have children. Everyone thinks he is really nice because I’m the emotional punchbag but no one sees this outside. I met him on a birthday party at a bar and dated him and I think to myself did I bring this upon myself and was I meant to go down a different path and marry someone else who would have lived a more Gursikh lifestyle. Marrying him has been the biggest regret, he has brought my sikhi down, now I am trying to not let him get in the way of it again even though he will complain when I get up for Amrit vela etc. If I didnt have kids I would have divorced him a long time. I just feel so stuck. It’s either stick with it or be a single parent.
  13. I a hindu (sindhi) man want to marry my fiance who is a sikh,in a Gurudwara is it possible?
  14. Hi, So there's a possibility of marrying a girl from India but i'm not sure entirely. Has anyone been through this recently? How much savings do you need? How long would it take for the girl to come over etc.. If anyone has any info it would be appreciated. Thanks in advance
  15. I am 23 and i want to get married but the problem is that I can't find the type women I am looking for here. I want a girl who dresses modestly isn't into partying one who enjoys books helping her mother etc the girls in my area are not like this and are all into parties and functions and being all show offy. Does anybody here have similar problwms?
  16. Nri Punjabi marries a dalit slum dweller.
  17. waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh ji i am 26 n a half year old and my parents are looking forward to my marriage.. it has been 3 years they have been looking but i am looking forward to amritdhari boy, my parents are not much supportive of this. I met couple of boys in the past but no one was ready, i also have this fear that what if i marry to someone having completely different lifestyle than me because i am keen to move forward in sikhi and not step back.. i am non amritdhari but want to go forward in sikhi, recently i came across one family they said that you can take amrit but after 6 months or a year. Boy isn't recently ready but he says that maybe by seeing me he will too get into this but that would require quite a time. what should i do ji it seem very difficult to decide ?
  18. Did any of the Guru ji's marry outside their caste? Iv heard that Mata Gujri (Gujjar Kaur) was of a Gujjar background?
  19. Guest

    Marriage

    Hi, I am a 27-year-old guy from Delhi. I am Hindu by birth. I have been following and practising Sikhism since long. I love going to Kirtan Samagams and very much into AKJ Kirtans. I love baani. I have this wish to marry a Sikh girl someday so that we can go to Kirtan Smagams together, practise Sewa and Simran and so on. I don't think that will be possible if I marry someone who does not know what baani is. Is this fine? Can I marry a Sikh girl being a Hindu?
  20. I am a sikh girl from punjab. My age is 25. I fallen in love with a hindu guy originally from UP but now settled in punjaab. He is really handsom and I love him a lot. But my family is sikh sardar. My boyfriends mother is saying the child will be raised as hindu and all hindu ceremonies will be performed on future son like mundan, ear peircing, janeu. I told my parents. Their parents met my parents and my parents are ok with it. my father and mother is amritdhari still they are allowing me to marry a hindu boy and future son will be hindu without turban. I am ok with it. But my local gurudwara granthi telling me its not good. and some aunties also telling same. I am confused . Please tell what I should do. My other 2 sikh friends have also married good looking hindu boys but I dont know if I am doing right thing although i like him.
  21. Guest

    Interfaith

    I am from a Sikh family and he is from a Punjabi Hindu family. We are both doctors working in New Zealand and have been together for 4 years. His family is supportive whereas my dad is extremely angry and wants us to break up. He says he will never approve. Me and my partner are both very open minded, easy going, believe in god and have immense respect for our faiths. I have no idea what to do. The stress is taking a toll. Any help would be appreciated
  22. Guest

    Professional matchmaker

    SSA everyone, I am looking for a company/professional matchmaker. Looking for someone either in Canada or India. I work about 6 months a year and do travel on and off within those 6 months., hence the choice of 2 locations.
  23. Would you marry someone who has already had s3x with other people ? I wouldn't because I have never had sex before and will wait for marriage. It's also gurus hukkam to only have physical relations within marriage MODS don't delete this thread.
  24. In our faith or in Sikh culture is there a structure in the household? Is man/husband the head of the house? During the lavaan/phere the man walks at front and leads the way. In kalki avtaar, when guru ji is describing how humanity will fall and go wrong, guru ji says men will stop respecting their parents and will come under their womans control. In most Punjabi houses the female/wife is the head of the house these days (probably why everything is going wrong, men have forgotten their responsibilities) What does Sikhi say about this? is the man supposed to be the head of the house?
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