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Found 24 results

  1. Guest

    —— and Lust?

    So allow me to introduce my self (anonymously) I am a 16 year old boy. In Sikhism Lust is considered a sin. But I have been confused. People say ——- is wrong because of Lust. Lust is a sin because it takes your mind away from God, basically it makes you forget about God. And that is why it is considered a sin. And that is why I don’t ————-. But, I am confused because if Lust is considered a sin because it makes you forget about God, then isn’t technically anything that makes you forget God a sin? For example When I play video games, I tend to forget about God, but not permanently, I forget about God while playing video games, but playing video games isn’t a sin. But Lust makes you forget about God and me playing video games does too. So what’s the difference between those two. I know this discussion is all over the place , so let me simple it down. I ask kindly for people to answer these questions 1. As a Sikh, do we have to constantly think about God, like every second or minute of the day? 2. What’s the difference between temporary forgetting God through Lust and temporarily forgetting God through other things such as Video Games, watching movies, doing Homework, playing a intense sport, etc. ? 3. ——- 4. ——- 5. finally, is forgetting God while doing other things, is forgetting God during those times a sin? 6. Finally, If forgetting God is the sin then Do I have to remember God every second or minute of the day? Or can I remember God throughout the day while spending time doing other things ? To everyone I mean no disrespect, I am just confused and curious. Please don’t ignore this form.
  2. Ocdperson


    So I uploaded a topic similar to this but I am still confused. So let’s get to the point, people say looking at videos of attractive females is lust because your not thinking about Naam and that your forgot my Naam. But aren’t we forgetting Naam when we take a school test or when we watch a movie. Because technically we are really focused on the test in school or the movie we are watching, so isn’t that technically lust too? When you take a test in school , the test take all your awareness towards it. Even when you watch a movie, the movie takes all your awareness too but people don’t consider both of these things lust, but they consider watching attractive females videos lust. Watching attractive females and watching a movie both do the same thing, they take your awareness away. So aren’t they both lust. Is watching videos of attractive females in moderation lust? Is masturbating in moderation lust? Because they are no different awareness wise than watching a movie or taking a test . No disrespect, I’m just confused.
  3. I have noticed that I have more lustful dreams after I have got into the habit of getting up for Amrit vela. I’m actually married too. *edited* Why is this? I hope it’s washing away sins, as I’m not even feel lustful in the day time whilst awake? —— As a separate issue, I always have day dreamed romantically since younger about a man who I’ve never met. Now he’s even come into my dreams. I can’t explain how real this person feels. Do you think this one is more of a psychological problem rather than spiritual? (I am a bit telepathic/see things before they happen in general).
  4. Gotam was a worshipper of the Saalgraam-Shivling (idol or statue, which is worn around the neck of Hindu saints). He meditated upon Shiva for many years and Shiva granted him a boon. Gotam was pleased and thought that he would need to think very carefully about what he wished for. He heard that Mudhgal's daughter Ahalia's marriage was to be arranged. Ahalia was so beautiful that all the deities and men wanted to marry her. Even Indra was ready to marry her. Ahalia's father, Mudhgal was not pleased to see that his daughter was seen as bait and did not like the fact that so many men were having lustful thoughts about her. So that his daughter was not married to any person, Mudhgal approached Brahma for advice. "O Brahma! So many men are fighting over my beautiful daughter and I do not enjoy seeing this. Please interfere and tell the deities to keep away from my daughter. Tell them to not go to war over her. Please think of a solution to this problem." Brahma listened and said that he will resolve this situation. Brahma called upon all deities and men who wished to marry Ahalia. "Look! Mudhgal's daughter is very beautiful. She only seeks to marry one man. You are all capable of becoming her husband. However, if you wish to win Ahalia over then you will all need to follow the code of conduct when it comes to marriage. You will all need to circle the whole earth within 24 minutes. The one, who does so first, will marry Ahalia." All the deities were astonished that Brahma had set such a task for them. But that did not stop from arguing. Brahma's four sons and Indra were very self-centred about this and waged they would win. Gotam heard about this and wished that he could marry Ahalia. Gotam went to his Saalgraam (an object of worship, usually a Shivling) and prayed. The Saalgraam appeared before Gotam and asked him, "O Gotam, whatever you wish now will come true." Gotam wished that he could circulate the whole earth within 24 minutes so that he could win and marry Ahalia. The Saalgraam agreed to help Gotam circulate the earth in the given time and Brahma will be able to see all this. Gotam was given the power to run like the gust of the wind and was given so much energy, that the neighbouring deities were shocked. Some deities even attempted to kill Gotam along the way, but with the blessing of the Saalgraam-Shivling, he was protected throughout his whole journey. Gotam reached Brahma and was the first to do so. At that point Brahma made the decision that Gotam will marry Ahalia. All the deities were displeased and were enraged with jealousy. They made attempts to steal Ahalia from Gotam, but Brahma gave the couple a protection so that no-one could take Ahalia away from Gotam. Gotam and Ahalia were situated near the River Ganges. Gotam went back to meditating and the story of winning Brahma's task had spread to all the other deities. Indra was still enraged and was disappointed that he failed the task. All the holy men and deities were becoming distressed because of Indra's anger. They were going without food and were abused by Indra. Gotam was hurt by all this and he prayed to Saalgraam to feed the Brahmins and holy men. Saalgraam granted Gotam his wish and he fed all the Brahmins and the holy men. All men began to chant Gotam's name and started singing his praises. Indra was again enraged about all this. Indra's anger lied within the task that Brahma set. With his supernatural powers, Indra created a cow. But the curse that Indra put on the cow was if Gotam touched it he would die. The cow went towards Gotam's ashram. Gotam had come out of his ashram and touched the cow. However, the cow died. There was uproar amongst the Brahmins that Gotam killed a cow, which is considered to be sacred in Hinduism. "He must now repent!" With the almighty protection of the Saalgraam, Gotam found out that this was all Indra's doings and he cursed all the Brahmins. He told them, "Go! You people will never be satisfied. You will remain in poverty for many births." On hearing this, the Brahmins became very worried and Gotam stopped the monthly feast he held for them. After some time, both Gotam and Ahalia had a baby daughter. She was ever so beautiful, just like her mother. Indar had not stopped his quest to have some sort of relationship with Ahalia. As time went by, Indra could not control his lust for Ahalia and he became in great distress. Many wise men advised Indra to not pursue his lust for Ahalia, but Indra was too stubborn to listen to let her go. Some foolish person advised Indra, "Gotam goes to have a bath at the River Ganges and it is time for him to pray. Go and request for help from the rooster and the moon. From the call of the rooster, Gotam awakes and when the moon comes out, Gotam goes to have a bath in the River Ganges. If the rooster calls and the moon come out at the same time then Gotam will have his ritual bath and begin his prayers." What a splendid idea thought Indra. Indra approached the rooster and the moon and asked for their help. They foolishly agreed to Indra's plan. The night had fallen. In the middle of the night, the rooster began to call and the moon came out. Gotam awoke on hearing the rooster. He went to the River Ganges and began his ritual bath. Whilst Gotam was having a bath, the River Ganges began to speak to him and warned him, "O Gotam, the Ganges is asleep at this time, why are you bathing in the middle of the night? A robber is about to come to your house and is about to deceive you, what are you doing here? Go home now!" On hearing this, Gotam returned home. Without him knowing, Indra had transformed into a cat. He transformed into a cat because Gotam would never leave Ahalia because so many deities were after her. When he went to bathe, he would always sit his daughter, Anjali, on the doorstep to stop anyone from entering the house. When Indra saw Anjali on the doorstep, he thought she would ask him, "Who's there?" and then he would be able to sneak in and attend to Ahalia. This plan went ahead and when Indra entered the house, he transformed himself into Gotam. Ahalia had no idea of this and both Indra and Ahalia made love. Gotam had come back from his ritual bath and he asked Anjali, "Who is inside?" At this point, Gotam's eyes were burning with rage and redness. Anjali said there was a cat inside. Gotam barged inside and saw Indra (in the disguise of Gotam) naked, lying next to Ahalia. Gotam remembered Saalgraam and cursed Indra. "O Indra, you sinful person! For one lustful moment and committing adultery, your whole body will be covered in vulva marks! You will be made to suffer!" On hearing these words, Indra became frightened and the curse began to cast its spell on Indra. 'Gothum Thapaa Ahiliaa Eisthturee This Dhaekh Indru Lubhaaeiaa.' 'Ahalyaa was the wife of Gautam the seer. Seeing her Indra was enticed. 'Sehus Sureer Chihun Bhug Hooeae Thaa Man Pashothaaeiaa.' 'When he received a thousands marks of disgrace on his body, then he felt regret within his mind.' (Guru Nanak Dev Ji; GGSJ: Ang 1344) In addition the moon was cursed. Gotam said to the moon, "You are part of this earth and provide us with light. But you helped a sinful person; therefore from this day now, you will not be a full moon as you have always been, but you will now change into crescents and become a full moon once a month!" The rooster was also cursed, "You will make your call in the mornings, but no-one will pay attention to you!" Having given the curses, Gotam returned home. He cursed his daughter for foolishly letting Indra within the house when she was meant to be guarding it. Anjali's curse was that she would have to face motherhood whilst she was still a virgin. A few years later, the curse had taken place and Anjali gave birth to a son, who was known as Hanuman. He said to Ahalia, "You are a mother to a beautiful daughter, but your intellect let you down. You slept and committed adultery with another man. You failed to recognise the difference between your own husband and a fake! You acted like a stone, which does absolutely nothing but just sits there. Either you will turn into a stone or you will take many births, where your lust will weaken immensely." Ahalia begged for mercy and asked for forgiveness! Gotam refused to listen and pronounced that she will remain as a stone for many ages until the birth of Sri Ram Chandar, who will be able to save her and take this curse away from her! Ahalia was sent to the River Ganges and the curse had taken its toll. Ahalia became a stone. Many ages later, Lakshman and Vishva Mitar began to meditate near Ahalia and Ahalia was emancipated there by Ram Chandar. Below is the story of Ahalia and Gotam Rishi as written by Bhai Gurdas Ji, Vaar 10, Pauri 18: ੧੮ : ਅਹਿੱਲਿਆ ਅਤੇ ਗੋਤਮ ਗੋਤਮ ਨਾਰਿ ਅਹਿਲਿਆ ਤਿਸਨੋ ਦੇਖਿ ਇੰਦ੍ਰ੍ਰ ਲੋਭਾਣਾ। Gotam Naari Ahiliaa Tisano Daykhi Indr Lobhaanaa. गोतम नारि अहिलिआ तिसनो देखि इंद्र लोभाणा । Ahalya was wife of Gautam. But when she set eyes Indhar, the king of gods, lust overpowered her. ਪਰ ਘਰਿ ਜਾਇ ਸਰਾਪੁ ਲੈ ਹੋਇ ਸਹਸ ਭਗ ਪਛੋਤਾਣਾ। Par Ghari Jaai Saraapu Lai Hoi Sahas Bhag Pachhotaanaa. पर घरि जाइ सरापु लै होइ सहस भग पछोताणा । He entered their house, got curse of being with thousands of pudendums and repented. ਸੁੰਞਾ ਹੋਆ ਇੰਦ੍ਰ੍ਰ ਲੋਕੁ ਲੁਕਿਆ ਸਰਵਰ ਮਨਿ ਸਰਮਾਣਾ। Sounaa Hoaa Indr Loku Loukiaa Saravari Mani Saramaanaa. सुंा होआ इंद्र लोकु लुकिआ सरवरि मनि सरमाणा । The Indralok (abode of Indr) became desolate and getting ashamed of himself he hid in a pond. ਸਹਸ ਭਗਹੁ ਲੋਇਣ ਸਹਸ ਲੈਂਦੋਈ ਇੰਦ ਪੁਰੀ ਸਿਧਾਣਾ। Sahas Bhagahu Loin Sahas Laindoee Indr Puree Sidhaanaa. सहस भगहु लोइण सहस लैंदोई इंद्र पुरी सिधाणा । On revocation of the curse when all those holes became eyes, only then he returned to his habitat. ਸਤੀ ਸਤਹੁ ਟਲਿ ਸਿਲਾ ਹੋਇ ਨਦੀ ਕਿਨਾਰੈ ਬਾਝੁ ਪਰਾਣਾ। Satee Satahu Tali Silaa Hoi Nadee Kinaarai Baajhu Paraanaa. सती सतहु टलि सिला होइ नदी किनारै बाझु पराणा । Ahalya who could not remain steadfast in her chastity became stone and remained lying on the river bank ਰਘੁਪਤਿ ਚਰਣ ਛੁਹੰਦਿਆਂ ਚਲੀ ਸੁਰਗ ਪੁਰਿ ਬਣੇ ਬਿਬਾਣਾ। Raghoupati Charani Chhuhandiaa Chalee Surag Puri Banay Bibaanaa. रघुपति चरणि छुहंदिआ चली सुरग पुरि बणे बिबाणा । Touching the (holy) feet of Ram she was lifted to the heavens. ਭਗਤ ਵਛਲ ਭਲਿਆਈਅਹੁੰ ਪਤਿਤ ਉਧਾਰਣੁ ਪਾਪ ਕਮਾਣਾ। Bhagati Vachhalu Bhaliaaeeahu Patit Udhaaranu Paap Kamaanaa. भगति वछलु भलिआईअहु पतित उधारणु पाप कमाणा । Because of His benevolence He is mother-like to the devotees and being forgiver of the sinners He is called redeemer of the fallen ones. ਗੁਣ ਨੋ ਗੁਣ ਸਭ ਕੋ ਕਰੈ ਅਉਗੁਣ ਕੀਤੇ ਗੁਣ ਤਿਸੁ ਜਾਣਾ। Goun No Goun Sabh Ko Karai Aougoun Keetay Goun Tisu Jaanaa. गुण नो गुण सभ को करै अउगुण कीते गुण तिसु जाणा । Doing good is returned by good gestures always, but he who does good to the evil is known as virtuous. ਅਬਿਗਤਿ ਗਤਿ ਕਿਆ ਆਖਿ ਵਖਾਣਾ ॥੧੮॥ Abigati Gati Kiaa Aakhi Vakhaanaa ॥18॥ अबिगति गति किआ आखि वखाणा ॥१८॥ How can I explain the greatness of that unmanifest (Lord).
  5. Guest


    Wjk wjkf I have had a problem with masturbation and porn addiction however recently I have stopped watching porn all together and havnt done for around 2 months but with masturbation I find it difficult and I seem to always get a long streak of not doing it and then a change in routine will throw me off. I really want to take amrit however this is holding me back as I don't want to break my amrit. My largest streak is 31 days so far is there any advice any one can give me as I feel embarrassed to ask the giani at my local gurdwara about this
  6. All who read the title may be thinking playing with yourself in a sexual manner. But let's understand kaam a little bit more in advance. Sangat jio, I can be an unsatisfied man at times! If I have gone with my friends to a high classified restaurant we all agree on one thing afterwards... "Next time we have to try another restaurant." Any guesses what we say next time after finding that another dine out?? "Next time we have to go for another restaurant!" Basically we can eat out in EVERY SINGLE restaurants across the whole wide world in our life time. Any guesses what will happen when ALL restaurants are dined out on? Will we be SANTOKH!? BACK TO POINT OF KAAM! Two words that I REALLY hate put together, is "Sexually unsatisfied." Two couples get married, they finally make love, then make love again... and again... NOTHING wrong there. However, once one spouse decides "I am not satisfied! I wanted more. My partner's not fulfilling all my desires I developed as a teen, My partner's sexual organs ain't big as I hoped..." THIS IS KAAM PLUS NOT BEING SANTOKH KICKING IN!" If you're unhappy with your spouse's body you are not likely to find happiness in a stranger's body (one out of many why partner's cheat on husband/ wife). Think about it. So Gurbani states to be santokhi and NOT to cheat on your partner. By being santokh half the life's problems will automatically be solved, BUT if your both lives are going by great and dandy, all love and happiness YOU'RE EVEN MOTHER AND FATHER! but never been happy with sex means the mind can become kaami, like "I wish their was another partner in my life, I wish I could cheat..." I guess we must be happy with what we have. You're a mum/ dad to 2 kids GREAT! It's a sign you made love and everything worked out well, if that didn't satisfy you, then what makes us think that another person could satisfy us?? (Just like new restaurants cannot satisfy us).
  7. Guest

    Lust kaam

    Khalsa ji, I am an amritdhari sikh who does nitnem everyday and amritwela. I am 15 and used to have problems with lust, porn, masturbation since past 2 -3 years. Recently I have stopped since past 6-7 months. I do ardas evryday. But now I am getting very strong sensations since past few days , and I am on the verge of making a mistake and giving in to my mind. I set restrictions on my safari and I do not know what to do. I keep a good sangat now which has helped me last for this long but now the thoughts are overpowering. I can feel the poison and toxic when having urges and thoughts but mind doesnt stop. Help me please!!!!!!
  8. Guest

    Masturbation I need help

    I'm an amritdhari 14 year old and I have masturbated 5 time.i really hate my self for it but in the moment my mind gives in. It somehow relieves me of my lust but I don't want to do it my mind gives in and im also forced by my mind to do it. I want to stop. Please help me pyare sangat
  9. Wjkk wjkf. I am a 17 year old amritdhari sikh and i had the urge for a couple of months to indulge in kaam. After really hard trying to fight it i gave in *edited*. I feel very guilty as maharaj said that you should look at the opposite sex as mother sister daughters etc. So please tell me if this is a bajjar kurehit and i have to do a peshi in front of the 5 pyare, or should i do ardas and ask maharaj for kirpa and forgiveness.
  10. Im an amritdhari and I have masturbated 3 times. I feel miserable knowing I have done this and feel like crying. When I do it I feel it relieves me of my lust and I try not to do it but my mind gives in. I feel truly sorry for this and I really want to stop. Please suggest what I should do also I am 15
  11. Guest

    Im A Besharm

    So im a late twenty something male and I have indulged in many bad things due to being overcome with lust, as have probably a lot of other males my sage. Im not amrit shakked but i have had sex before marriage included with married women and even sex with prostitutes. Now i feel very ashamed of all this and deep regret but whats done has been done. I cannot go back and change this but can make sure i make sure i dont carry on making these mistakes. What should i do. I try to meditate but my mind wanders and a lot of the time goes towards lustful thoughts. Kaam and krodh plague me the most i feel. What would the sangat advise.I know i have comitted very big sins and no doubt will have to pay for these sins in this life or the next but will the Guru forgive me? I am honestly trying to make a conscious effort to leave all this behind and leave it in the past. To try and make an effort to become a better person and a better Sikh. Any guidance or advice that the sangat can provide would be a blessing.
  12. i had a crush on a girl but problem is that I am not sure weather i really love her. what to do i don't undetstand.
  13. Why is it bad to lust after a person? Masturbation is a pleasurable experience, what is so bad about it that must be conquered spiritually?? If it hurts no one else, why is it bad?
  14. I was blessed with amrit roughly a month ago but two to three afterwards, I started indulging in lust again. I am about 16 now and started indulging in lust at around 10 to 11.
  15. Guest


    Hello, I wanted to know how someone could control masturbation and lust. I'm currently having this problem and would like to stop.
  16. After reading through a number of masturbation and lust problems, I was reading through a website when I came across a message which could be highly helpful. http://satnaam.info/2005/12/02/2-overcoming-the-effect-of-past-lives/ Practicing what this page says should help to put you back on the right path. May Waheguru help you.
  17. first of all , this is NO joke thread or any topix like thread. This is a serious. Well I have to admit that I am a bad Sikh - I watched porn and was somehow addicted for more than 4 years now.. I know there is nothing to be proud of and I feel ashamed . But due to Maharaj I managed now to stay away from all these "lustful" things in this society. I hate this society - every where is sex - from little you are forced to see such things.. really . I guess if there werent such things - I would never fall into this "addiction" . Anyway.... Now I am clean for about 1Month - and trust me it was REALLY hard. I did everything to avoid lustful thoughts and things and seeing woman in wrong way ( its hard cause most of them even attract us guys with short pants etc.. but thats not the topic) Well now I must say I feel very strong and clean - I keep saying myself "Mann jithe jagg Jeet" and it works - but I start to notice "physical problems" , like my intestinal making trouble and my testicles are feel "heavy" , like they are full or smth - there is such a pressure and I have cramps.. I dont know why! I didnt touched myself since 1 month , why all of this is happening now??!? I thought I have overcome that shitty Kaam... and I thought i can control it ( I know i cant kill it , because its a part of human being - but I want to control it) The Problem why I am posting this here as gupt is - that I dont want to go to a doctor. The reasons: 1. I feel ashamed of me 2. Maybe there is a woman dr. and it all will go worse - I dont want that - I still not feel that i conquer that. the battle goes on you know.. 3. I would NEVER tell my parents even if I die ( punjabi ... you know) I try to handle it myself .. have you guys ANY tips? I googled alot and searched the internet but there is nothing ABOUT abstinence only about SEX.. people are mad ... they say you have to "realease " the pressure etc- but I dont want to! This is a fight between me and my Paapi mann - I am trying to get the control over FULLY. So can you guys please help me? Or any dr.. here? Thank you..
  18. Guest

    Bajar Kurehit In Dreams

    wjkkwjkf, I am a middle aged man just taken Amrit. I do nitnem daily but last night a bajar kurehit happened in my dream. I happened to be with another woman (unknown) . Guru Gobind Singh ji said not to share bed with other women, not even in dreams. What will happen to me? I am scared. I am sinned. Will Guru ever forgive me for this paap I have done? Do I have to go for peshi I am ashamed of myself.
  19. Guest

    Cant Look At Myself

    Fataeh I'm amrit shakya and female and i masturbated once only and i feel bad its not intercourse so im not sure what to do. It took three days to realise i made mistake, but i don't know if im wrong or really wrong.
  20. Is there any Shabad to beat kaam?
  21. I have been an amritdhari since June and now I am facing a most extreme battle with myself. Please help me. 1.) Lust- I have tried very hard controlling it but it seems to be triumphing. I wake up in the mornings and sometimes my kachera is soiled. At first I thought it would be the food I eat and so cut down on my diet but this problem still continues. How to stop this? 2.) When lust is done I feel angry at myself very much. When I wake up late to do nitnem I feel very angry How do I stop this? 3.) During the weekends I try waking up but my body feels the cold and doesn't let me. How do I overcome this?
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