"family & "sikhs" Asked Me 2 Cut My Hair!"

[sher_panjabi]

vwihgurU jI kw Kwlsw!

vwihgurU jI kI &iqh!!

This is a serious topic, I apologise if it is sensitive issue to have on the forum.

A Sikh sister emailed me in regards to a problem.

The problem she was facing was that she has all of her life not dishonoured her kesh (she has not shaved/wax/cut hair). However family members, and ladies from the local Gurdwara sangat have questioned her on why she doesn't shave or wax. The pressure and insistance by other people to cut and shave her hair has made this Sikh sister question why she is going through the heart-ache of keeping Kesh (which she does out of the love of Guru Ji and following Guru' Hukam) if she is going to face abuse and pressure from other people. <_<

I hope the Penji does not mind if I share my response to her email - in hoping that it may open awarenessa and perhaps help someone in a similar situation.

Guru Raka

Dear Sikh sister,

Your hair is given to you by Waheguru. You have not put it there nor have any of the people telling you to cut it given it to you. Akaal Purkh (the Almighty Lord) has given you this gift of hair.

What will happen if you cut it?

Imagine that your granddad gives you a present. You open the present and then shred the present to pieces. How would your granddad feel? How would the person feel who has given you the present?

Gurbaani says:

"naam hamaarai antarjaamee. naam hamaarai aavai kaamee. rom rom raviaa har naam. satgur poorai keeno daan. (1)... The Naam, the Name of the Lord, is the Inner-knower of my heart. The Naam is so useful to me. The Lord's Name permeates each and every hair of mine. The Perfect True Guru has given me this gift. (1)" (Ang 1144)

It is of no concern to others whether they think you should cut your hair or not. It is your mind and body! However, it’s not even ours! Our mind, body and soul belong all to the Kartaar (the Creator).

"tudh aagai ardaas hamaari, jee'o pind sabh tera. k-ho naanak sabh teri vaddiaayee, koyee naa'o naa jaane mera... My prayer before You is that my soul and body belong to You Waheguru! Nanak says: All Glory belongs to You - nobody knows my name!"

Dear sister keep strong! Remember you are Princess! Our Father Guru Gobind Singh Ji has blessed his daughters with the name "Kaur" (princess) to remind them to be courageous, graceful and brave. Dear sister, we can either fall into vanity and the pressures of the world, or we can follow the true path, which is unchanging and leads to peace, which is the path of the Guru.

Keep in Chardikala (high spirits)! I advise that you reassess the Sangat (company) you have. Do Sangat with those people who are like minded and spiritual people. Just because someone is wearing a Dastaar or looks religious, doesn't mean that they are following their path truly internally.

Your dedication to Sikhi Saroop (the Sikh image bestowed upon us by our Guru) probably pricks people who have not got the courage to keep their own hair. Jealousy affects many people. In JapJi Sahib it says: "Asankh Nindak Sir Karai Bhaar" – The person thinks that if i can't do it then why is the person doing it. Those people slander those who are on the path of the truth.

Dear Sikh sister, perhaps through your dedication, courage and respect for Guru's Rehat, you will inspire those around you. At first they may have felt threatened by your dedication to keeping the Guru’s Rehat but seeing your steadfastness in keeping Guru's Hukam they will realise that the Sikhs of Guru Sahib are living examples of what a Sikh truly is.

Hope that helps.

May Guru guide and support you.

Shabad & Translation:

basant baanee naamde’o jee kee.

Basant, The Word Of Naam Dev Jee:

ik ounkaar satgur prasaad.

One Universal Creator God. By The Grace Of The True Guru:

saahib sankattvai sevak bhajai. chirankaal na jeevai, do-oo kul lajai. ||1||

If the servant runs away when his master is in trouble, he will not have a long life, and he brings shame to all his family. ||1||

teree bhagat na chhoddo, bhaavai log hasai. charan kamal merae hee’a-re basai. ||1| |r-haa-o||

I shall not abandon devotional worship of You, O Lord, even if the people laugh at me. The Lord's Lotus Feet abide within my heart. ||1||Pause||

jaise apne dhanehi praanee maran maa(n)ddai. taise sant janaa raam naam na chhaaddai

The mortal will even die for the sake of his wealth; in the same way, the Saints do not forsake the Lord's Name. ||2||

gangaa gayiaa godaavree sansaar ke kaamaa. naaraa-in suprasann hoe te sevak naamaa. ||3||1||

Pilgrimages to the Ganges, the Gaya and the Godavari are merely worldly affairs. If the Lord were totally pleased, then He would let Naam Dev be His servant. ||3||1|| (Ang 1195)

[Harnek Singh]

Waheguru Jika Khalsa Waheguru Jiki Fateh

A short example: A good friend of mine keeps his hair and beard and wears a turban, eventhough his family use to cut his hair when he was a child.

I think one should not forsaken his/her relationship to Waheguru based on lack of faith in others surrounding him/her.

Gurfateh

[Jaspaul Singh]

Ohh man ...

Why do grownups do this ??? They are elders... and this is what kind of education they are teaching us... to cut our hair ???? <_<

If anyone says that to me... first i would explain to them... i would remaincalm but if they still persist in making fun of my hair and how i look (cuz this is how GURU JI made me and no mattter how i look i dont give a rats a**) ... i would next either knock that person out or give him such an answer that he would think twice on saying anything to any person...

... if someone believes that waxing,trimming is right.. that is their opinion... but straight up, if you do dat you should stop...

...what would guru ji say ?

... and to those elders who do this... only way to stop them is for us to do prachaar in our OWN families... im pretty sure we got one or two elders in our own famlies who put others down who are trying their best to stay in sikhi principles...

If you do it yourself... do it ....but putting someone else down cuz you think what your doing is right is WRONG !!!

............ damn i gotta control my anger......... i hate it ............but sometimes things just get to you ............... :wub: