Women’s Facial Hair Issues And Answers

[Simran9]

http://www.panthic.org/news/133/ARTICLE/15...71d2c778fd10fc0

Women’s Facial Hair Issues and Answers

Sunday 24th July, 2005

Yashpal Kaur – Panthic Weekly Columnist

(KP) –

In this modern era of human society, it has become nearly a mandatory expectation that women have a clean face, free from facial hair. Whether it is because of the ideal women portrayals from Hollywood, Bollywood, fashion, or commercial advertisements, it has indeed become an increasingly growing problem for young women who aspire to be true Sikhs one day, and obtain Khande ki Pahul Amrit from the Panj Pyare.

Even Punjab has become home to countless beauty parlors as increasing numbers of women are opting for facial hair jobs, to mention the number of young women from Sikh families who are taking beauty parlor courses.

From a sociological perspective, we feel obligated to surrender ourselves to the norms of the dominant society we live in. Within the dominant culture exist many small subcultures often viewed as extremists, outcasts, simply weird or “uncool” because by their mere existence challenge the dominant norm. We are constantly evaluating another person’s impression of us. We often develop our self image based on how others perceive us.

As a result, we are consumed with the thought that facial hair is not normal, and go to great lengths to conform to the norms of our parents, family, and ambient culture we live in:

dunIAw kwrix dInu gvwieAw ]5]

dhuneeaa kaaran dheen gavaaeiaa ||5||

For the sake of the world, people have lost their faith. ||5||

(Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 1410)

However, it is a mandatory requirement for any Sikh to maintain his unshorn hair. It is a bujjar kurehat (cardinal sin) to alter the body’s hair by means such as shaving, waxing, trimming, plucking, dying, etc. Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji says on Ang 443:

romy roim roim romy mY gurmuiK rwmu iDAwey rwm ]

romae rom rom romae mai guramukh raam dhhiaaeae raam ||

With each and every hair, with each and every hair, as Gurmukh, I meditate on the Lord.

Many Sikh women do not realize the consequences of hair removal from the body. It is a most difficult sacrifice for someone who has already evolved somewhat in Sikhi to leave their known life and present themselves in front of the Panj Pyare to receive Amrit. That former life will die to be replaced by the new life of a Gursikh which requires great effort and obedience. A person who surrenders themselves completely to the Guru should obey every hukam (command) to the best of his or her ability. Only a person with such understanding realizes the consequences of stepping back and following the orders of self-willed Manmukhs.

A Sikh who bends to the pressures of society will also experience a downfall in their spirituality which can eventually lead to severe depression and a sense of confusion. They may lose the sense of belonging because what they value most was taken away from them. Feelings of lost purpose or mission in life, severe depression, confusion, and the lack of interest in one’s life can lead one to become suicidal. One can ponder," What’s the point to this life if we can’t even live by the principles of Sikhism? " However, the Gurus rejected suicide as a solution to one’s problems. Countless Sikhs have been martyred when they could have easily killed themselves to avoid the pain of torture. The Gurus instead ask the Sikh to turn to Gurbani and Simran to seek solace and regain a foothold on the path.

Although many men who aspire to be Sikhs face discrimination by keeping a full beard, it is just as equally challenging for women today. Young women are being forced by their parents to consider electrolysis and other hair removal techniques that they be more marriageable. These procedures are expensive, tedious, and painful and they are not 100% permanent as some people assume. New follicles are regenerated by the skin in a few years and if it is done improperly it can cause infection, skin damage, and even partial to fuller regrowth of the hair. Surprisingly, we are still willing to take the risk and undergo the procedure.

Parents who fear they will not find a suitable match for their daughter if she has facial hair need to ask themselves a few common sense questions. Firstly, realize that by removing hair we prove to ourselves that we do not have full faith in our Guru. How will we ever know if our son-in-laws are truly Sikhs at heart if we never give them the opportunity to see our daughters with their God-given natural face? How can we marry our daughters to men who can not look beyond the skin? It is a huge mistake on our part as Sikh parents to wish our daughters to commit such an act of cardinal sin. Bhai Nand Lal Ji’s Thankhaanama warns:

gur bcn isau qUtw jwie ] drgih qWkau imlY sjwie]15]

gur bachan sio thoottaa jaae || dharagehi thaa(n)ko milai sajaaei||15||

Those who turn away from their responsibility to accept the Guru's orders will receive punishment in God's Court.

So whose orders are more beneficial to follow: the superficial, who are in love with the temporary things in life or those who will advise you correctly and lead you towards the right path of being a successful Sikh?

jy qUM qwrU pwix qwhU puCu iqVMn@ kl ]

jae thoo(n) thaaroo paan thaahoo pushh thirra(n)nh kal ||

If you wish to swim across the water, then consult those who know how to swim.

qwhU Kry sujwx vMw eyn@I kprI ]3]

thaahoo kharae sujaan va(n)n(j)aa eaenhee kaparee ||3||

Those who have survived these treacherous waves are very wise. ||3||

JV JKV EhwV lhrI vhin lKysrI ]

jharr jhakharr ouhaarr leharee vehan lakhaesaree ||

The storm rages and the rain floods the land; thousands of waves rise and surge.

siqgur isau Awlwie byVy fubix nwih Bau ]4]

sathigur sio aalaae baerrae dduban naahi bho ||4||

If you cry out for help from the True Guru, you have nothing to fear - your boat will not sink. ||4||

(Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 1410)

It has become clear that regardless of how much parents enforce their desires or threaten loss of privileges, it is our duty as Sikh men and women to obey the highest hukam given to us by our Gurus which overrides all other worldly demands. And as Sikh parents we need to understand our crucial obligation to educate and expose our children from the cradle onwards and take our children to the Gurdwara Sahib to Gurujee and sangat. It would be morally reprehensible to force our children to step away from that Guru’s doorway and force them instead to follow shallow norms in conflict with our Guru’s teachings.

Yashpal Kaur can be reached at yashpal.kaur@panthic.org

[Paneet]

:doh:

Thankyou for that.