Wales85

May I suggest... 1. Sports 2. Sports, and 3. Sports Seriously, team based + physical activity = confidence booster IMHO

I am not canadian, but if this school is publicly funded shouldn't this be a conflict of separation of church and state? It would appear that the tax revenue from one religious group is being used to fund its own extinction....

awesome. Please make a note when all corrections are made.

I have been fighting kaam as well. In the past couple of months I have got a TON better, however I am married so that definitely help... but not as much as everyone thinks IMHO. I read this post a while back, but I was trying to think about what exactly has helped me so much recently. Few tips: 1. Stay busy being productive and social. Being social with buddies/classmates etc really helps. 2. One look is ok, two is not. Its ok to look at a pretty girl and appreciate it.... thats perfectly normal. Just do not give yourself that second look... that second look is where kaam is IMHO. 3. If you fail, turn it into a positive. I think the guilt is what screws us over, especially as young bucks. Instead of indulging yourself more after a failure... make yourself do as much good as you can to make up for it. (ex: seva, cut the grass, hit the gym, etc.) This reverses the momentum of indulging in kaam, and fills you with positive feelings. Negativity fuels kaam because it destroys your self respect, and self respect is the antithesis of kaam. Fateh!

I have never been able to achieve anything in life without help from other people. Religion is a term we give to this collective knowledge. You get help for ever other part of your life (work, school, learning to read, learning manners, etc.) so why not help in answering the most important questions. Even if you do not call it religion, everyone has a religion. To say that you do not have a religion is to state that your religion is irreligion. If you are asking what is the point of futile rituals and endless chanting etc.... I think everyone would agree it is useless. The "religion" that you are attacking is indeed a waste of time, but your conception of it is not the same as everyone elses.

For me personally it does not matter. If I am lost, tired, and thirsty from wandering through the desert, and someone offers me a glass of water I will drink it. I will not debate my benefactor by asking how he got the water, where he got the water, etc...... because I love the water for what it is. It gives me nourishment. On the flip side if I was thirsty and given a cup full of salt water, I would not want it even if I was told God himself poured this cup for me! Gurbani is a gift, and it is a cure for the hardships of this world. I am not saying your questions don't have answers, but I am saying the answer isn't as important as you think it is IMHO. The real question is are you thirsty? If you are, will you accept the cup your Guru is offering you?

Consider seeing a shrink. It could really help you.

Western, eastern, muslim, sikh, buddhist, catholic... Looks like crap, smells like crap.... must be crap. I don't care where they come from or their religion. Sex tourism thing is totally true, and more needs to be done to crack down on it... both in western countries and in the countries allowing this to happen. That being said, anywhere there is a significant muslim minority they always clash with the non muslims. India, England, Philippines, Thailand... independent of the race/country of origin. So like I said, Looks like crap, smells like crap

or just succeed and do well. Let barking dogs continue to bark, giving jerks attention is giving them more than they deserve.

Wow Arthur that was extraordinarily interesting. I have this creeping fear that it is inauthentic. Do you have sources?

6 days on - one day off... I took friday. Gotta have a day off to look forward to IMHO if you feel burned, get out, take a walk, come back... better to learn a few things well than many things half-way and don't take that test until you are ready... Period... end of story. Day before test don't study at all, don't even talk about it... just chill and get good nights sleep. Or maybe just forget all of that... maybe your brain works different :-) Goodluck!

Violence, rape, murder, massive unemployment, rising fundamentalism, illiteracy and lack of education in the muslim world, corruption to an ungodly scale..... these never seem to bother these guys..... but let a girl show half of her navel and watch out! From any other religion this would be absurd... from these guys its just more of the same.

Thats Our Lady of Guadalupe. Very big among hispanic catholics. Mary was a very good woman. but I agree that placing a catholic Icon in the center of a mural of the sikh gurus does not really make any sense at all...but then again, hippies do some crazy stuff http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Our_Lady_of_Guadalupe

The Symbols of a Heritage by I.J. Singh “History”, as T.S. Eliot said “has many cunning passages, contrived corridors and issues . . .”. Insofar as religions deal with people, places and events, they are amenable to historical analyses. But religions deal with a reality that transcends history — a reality that the senses cannot perceive and the intellect cannot fathom, yet with which the soul can commune. At that point in awareness one is in the domain of faith. Faith is better than belief. In belief someone else does the thinking for you; in faith, you accept the truth not at someone else’s say so, but because you have internalized it and endorsed it. Belief can mature into faith. From belief comes dependency; from faith, strength. The intangible realm of faith is a symbolic reality that is best expressed through symbols. It is well to remember that the dimension of faith is not that of science. Of Man’s many concerns, the deepest — faith — is symbolically expressed. By definition symbols and signs signify something else beyond themselves, yet a symbol participates in defining the reality to which it points. A flag is not a nation but a symbol of it and attests to the shared history and dignity of a nation. That is why good people will fight and die for a flag but not let it be desecrated; it becomes significantly more in worth than the price of the cloth from which it is cut. A symbol therefore, can’t be easily replaced by another, or be subjected to scientific logic, nor can it be judged by the criteria of the marketplace. Symbols are seen in every act of faith. They live and die but only after a historical catastrophe which greatly alters a people’s perception of self and their destiny. The death of existing symbols constitutes devastating events no less important than the phenomena that give them birth and shape. Symbols cannot be invented at will or intentionally produced by committees like business logos. They grow out of the collective consciousness of a people and have to be accepted by the subconscious dimension of their being. Their majesty and power lies in their symbolic character, not in any utilitarian value they might possess. Symbols are found in most aspects of man’s creative activity — art, music, mathematics, history, religion. In fact, man’s cultural history is often symbolically expressed. A cross is a symbol of Christ’s suffering, not the reality of it. After 2000 years of diaspora, the Jews seem to have recognized how symbols connect people to their roots; witness the growing popularity of the Lubavitchers. India has produced many new religions — Buddhism, Jainism, Sikhism among others. Of these only Sikhism remains as a visible, active and distinct entity; others have reverted into the uneasy but comforting fold of Hinduism. Buddhism remains a powerful presence in Sri Lanka, Thailand, Myanmar, Vietnam, China and Japan, but not in the land of its birth, India. Galbraith is correct in his somewhat facetious observation that anything that goes to India or develops there eventually gets Hinduized. He was talking of industry but it is equally true of religions. Islam in India is not quite the same as it is elsewhere, nor is Christianity. Sikhism too has lost some of its luster and much of its pristine purity by its constant brushing with Hinduism. If Sikhism has not been absorbed into the Hindu fold entirely it is not for want of trying by Hinduism, but due to two reasons: 1) Its distinct philosophy which is at odds with and bluntly scornful of many Hindu practices, but that is a minor factor in its survival since most Sikhs are not well versed in it, and 2) The distinct external symbols of Sikhism which set the Sikhs apart in appearance and behavior. Sometimes, I think that the rot in Sikhism had set in, but has been checked somewhat by the dramatic trauma to their psyche that occurred when the Indian army attacked the Golden temple and many other gurudwaras in 1984. In many ways, those events and the subsequent continuous state of war between India and the Sikhs has forced most Sikhs to reexamine their values and their sense of self. Many Sikhs who were no longer recognizable, became so by readopting the symbols of their faith. It was a horrendous price to pay for the Sikhs, but in the longer historical perspective, the benefits may be increased self-awareness. The most visible aspect of Sikh tradition, and the most controversial are the external symbols. Not surprisingly, they generate the most intense internal debate and external concern. The interesting point is that only in Sikhism are such weighty and important matters debated by the laity. It is like “war being too important to be left to the Generals.” The theologians and the clergy may preach and teach but the discussion is led and fueled by the ordinary folks who have to live the religion in the modern world; these people are on the front lines and know the price, the problems, the frustrations as well as the rewards. And many of the people have never even taken the final vows (Amrit) of becoming Sikhs. It was just as true at the time of Guru Gobind Singh as it is now that many Sikhs never adopted all of the symbols of Sikhism but — like the Marrano Jews — kept their faith. Such “Sehajdhari” Sikhs have occupied an important and honorable place in Sikh history. But more about them another time. There are many ways to look at Sikh symbols, the most popular way is to say: The Guru ordained them, ours is not to question why or what he meant by them. There is merit in that position. But the Guru did not bar us from thinking; so let us see what history can tell us. If symbols emerge out of shared history, how did we come to these five? And how has history affected them? The Sikh with his external uniform and symbols is a Khalsa, a soldier in the army of God. This army created by Guru Gobind Singh was not made to rule over others or to shepherd a flock of sheep-like devotees. Unlike the army of Christ where only the clergy were to be in uniform, in this army of the Khalsa all followers were to join, all were to wear the uniform, everyone was always on call. Though symbols are not to be judged by their utilitarian value, some of the Sikh symbols seem to be more functional than others. If long hair is de rigueur, a comb is essential for grooming, particularly for a people who knew no peace and lived on horseback. For a people fighting for survival, a sword as a weapon ensured survival. Again, befitting their life-style and India’s terrain and weather, knee length drawers were appropriate. A steel bracelet spoke of the strength of steel; its circle, of a life with no beginning and no end. This strong wide band of steel could also protect or be used as a weapon. In seventeenth century India, when there was a price on every Sikh’s head, when a non-Muslim could not wear a turban, carry a weapon or ride a horse, when it was easier and more tempting to join the faceless anonymous hordes, the long haired Khalsa boldly asserted their presence through their visible symbols. These symbols were a uniform of the Khalsa and still remain so. The philosophy of the Khalsa is eternal and the symbols represent it. When I look at these symbols nearly three hundred years later, I see that most Sikhs have made a distinction even though at a subconscious level and look at symbols in two different tiers. Circumstances and times have indeed changed. The sword, the comb and the knee length drawers were primarily utilitarian and seem to have changed the most with time. The sword that most Sikhs carry nowadays has been reduced to a symbolic level. Sometimes it is a dull blade a few inches long, more often it is a symbolic sword no more than an inch or two long attached to a comb or a pendant; at times it is only an impression of the sword inlaid into the wood of the comb. The sword has changed from a practical instrument of defence to a symbolic presence of that principle, of strength and resoluteness in action. Similarly, the knee length drawers which were the only garment worn below a loose, long shirt have been modified by most Sikhs who wear the conventional underwear to go with other street attire. The comb though utilitarian has not changed all that much because it is still necessary for the long hair, although many Sikh women now carry only a small non-functional miniature. The steel bracelet and the long hair remain what they have always been — strictly symbolic. Professor Puran Singh likened the steel bracelet to a wedding band signifying the marriage of the Sikh to the Guru. However, a marriage is a sacrament only where there is real love; for many philanderers the bracelet, like the wedding band, can come on or off with equal ease. Others would rather lose a finger, a hand or a head than a wedding band. A Sikh surgeon would need to remove it and pocket it lest it tear the gloves. If the identity of a Sikh depended only on a visible bracelet, it would be easy for one to hide and that is not what Guru Gobind Singh intended. The long unshorn hair, strictly symbolic, with no pragmatic use or value in the marketplace remains the centerpiece of Sikh identity. It was true 300 years ago and remains equally true now. One wonders what circumstances in history mandated that only the men adopt the turban to cover the long hair and not the women. The women do maintain all the Sikh symbols including the long unshorn hair. But in the Indian cultural milieu, without a turban they are not easily distinguishable from the millions of Indian women who are not Sikh. Certainly there is no bar to women wearing a turban and some Sikh women in India do; almost all of the Western converts to Sikhism do. For women, wearing of the turban over their long hair appears to have less to do with their understanding of Sikhism and more to do with the cultural constraints or with the particular school of thought or teacher who has influenced them. One need also remember that around the time that the Sikh symbols evolved, the Muslim rulers had barred non-Muslim men from wearing a turban. In the Indian culture the turban for a man signified respect irrespective of religion, women did not wear it. It was worn by a man who mattered and at that time, the emphasis of the rulers was to debase the subjects and deny them basic human dignity, self worth and self respect. The Gurus reversed this process and the turban though not one of the five basic symbols of Sikhism became inseparable from them, at least for the men. To serve well symbols must remain visible. Sometimes they are hidden much as the Marrano Jews found it necessary to hide their Jewishness when survival demanded it. Sikh symbols too can be easily concealed — all except the long, unshorn hair. That is precisely why in the annals of Sikh history the unshorn hair have commanded the highest value. I don’t know if Guru Gobind Singh so intended but in the subconscious dimension of their being, the Sikhs have somehow created a hierarchy of their symbols; the long unshorn hair have come to occupy the place of first among equals. A Sikh historically and now, declares his presence by this gift of his Guru. This is wholly consistent with the philosophic significance of a Sikh, and I venture to say that no matter how Sikhs change and what demands are placed upon them, as long as there are those who call themselves Sikhs, there will be long-haired Sikhs in the form that Guru Gobind Singh gave them. The dictum on the interdependence of form and function is significant and worthy of our attention. A person gets from a symbol what he puts in it. It can be one man’s comfort and inspiration as easily as another’s jest and scorn. In the final analysis, symbols are an embodiment of history, not sentiment. [Extracted from the author’s book “Sikhs and Sikhism- A view with a bias” (pp. 29-34) published in 1998 by Centennial Foundation, Mississauga, Ontario, Canada]

Your asking good questions. God is much bigger than we can imagine, and your struggling with the "kid" concept of God that you learned as a child into something much bigger. Only God can answer the questions you ask, so may I suggest you continue to direct your questions to him? Just make sure to pay attention when he questions you.

whenever you see interviews with these converts, 9 times out of 10 they are absolute idiots. An educated convert to islam happens like one time out of a million, and then they quickly make 5000 youtube videos about it. From where I stand, sikhs are 10000000 times more integrated, while at the same time maintaining their identity. In the US when I see a sikh guy he is doing very well for himself, while some muslims are wealthy but most are not at all.

Brother, someone has given you bad information. they do take oaths... not bad oaths but on their lives...but evil rituals? Hiram abiff? May I suggest that you go visit a lodge... I think you would be pleasantly surprised. Membership has been drying up for years, and I think they would appreciate the interest. Usually just a bunch of old men who get together on the weekends and try to help each other be better people.

Its just a social club.

Will do. God be with you and your family.

1. Its a process, your GPA changes and is not static. You lowered it you can change it, so stop with all this negative self talk. It gets you absolutely nowhere. 2. You sound depressed, consider talking to someone. Maybe ADD? It can be a legit diagnosis, so be open to it. 3. Schedule your time, not by allocating time, but by objectives. If you don't write down objectives, you have no way to know if you have achieved them. Fail to plan, plan to fail. 4. Get enough sleep, this is VITAL. 5. Eat healthy 6. Get exercise Just a phase bro, I have been there. Just take a deep breath, stop with the " I am gonna fail, blah blah blah" talk and actually identify the problem. Go talk to your professor. Go talk to a shrink, and then move on. -W

I am married to a punjabi girl. I asked her fathers permission from the very beginning (as soon as we started dating I made my wife invite me for dinner). The "upfrontness" kind of impressed them, though I think they thought I was just a relatively safe gora phase at first, and after 5 years of consistently being polite and doing well and stuff (ie: school and stuff is very important to desis in general) and going to desi functions, meeting family, etc.I asked his permission and he and her mother gave it. At any time if he had said no, that would have been that. Up to the minute before marriage the parents have that right, and you have to accept that. All parents, not just desis, have this right, and it is a good thing in virtually all cases. Even after marriage the family is very important, incredibly more close nit than most caucasian families(though it pains me to admit that ;-). Your ex's mother and father are more important than you at this point. His mother does not approve, so that literally is the end of the story. Sounds harsh I know, but I have seen how this goes down and it doesn't go well for you or him or the kids or anyone. The only possible way I could see an out is if his father absolutely adored you, but even then it is an uphill battle, and cross cultural relationships are difficult enough as it is so you just need to walk. Take my advice, I promise it is good. -W

I am sorry guys. I am cramming for finals, just got through with a week of hell in school, and I was just joking around. I didn't see what dalsingh wrote but I am sure he was just joking as well. Even though we go back and forth like a couple of internet supernerds I still think he is a good sikh and I respect him. We both have , IMO, the same weaknesses but just come from different points of view... hence the bickering. I am from the south as well, although I don't live there now, and it is true that some of the best people on the planet live there. Also a thriving sikh/punjabi/guju community in Atlanta if you didn't know. Sometimes this forum can get so serious, and I was kind of trying to use humor to lighten it up. It was immature of me to derail this thread, especially considering how serious of a thread it was. Sorry Sangat. I will now actually start to learn some of this crap... 180 slides on surgical flaps anyone? PS To make up for my immaturity. As a note to the thread starter.. Perhaps you are weak, but God is not. God can make even the weak strong, and when he does it is even more beneficial because the glory can only be attributed to him and not to the person. Even if you lack faith in yourself, submit your will to your lord, and give your difficulties as an offering. Other Sikh's gave their head for their Guru, and I think all of us, including you, have to do the same to be worthy to meet our lord. Goodluck!

Yes, I think you are right actually. That must be an urban myth.

Of course they do, they have been doing far worse for many many many years. Just say the word Bomb and Islam in a phone conversation and you can bet it is being recorded. I am Jack's complete lack of surprise.

No, its me. I like the mullet, it says yes I can party, but I have a sophisticated side as well. Its important to keep a classy image. Besides a pag, its the best hair style in existence.