Am I Doomed?

[Guest a moni]

heyy,

im also a moni n alot of what u said applies to me! including this

QUOTE

as in i doubt they would accept it they are punjabi and alot of people in my extended family are very much concerned with outward appearance. i once grew my eyebrows and pretended i couldnt be bothered to thread them - that i was too busy studying to worry about things like that - my mom and sister laughed at me!!! (in jest they didnt mean it a nasty way and probably didnt realise it offended me) they did the same when i didnt remove hair from my legs.. there was a time when i would remove it every week now i can go 4 months without touching it

lol. ive also made minor mistakes but im a completely different person now n would never go back to my old sinful ways. i think u realise how forgivving god is when u get into sikhi cuz u just feel so blessed to have been given this oppertunity to start again! n i truly do blieve that all the naam japping u do counts, however even iif it doesnt, im just glad its makin me a better person. i was told by a very religious and spiritual sant that it is the hair on the haid that should be kept- as this also retains the divine energy and heat that u get when u naam japp- not the facial hair which is unnatural on women- i was talking to a sikh from india recently and he told me he knew not a single amritdhari woman with facial hair in india- our western water is definilty different and it helps the hair products sell! lol. many many amritdhari women old and young in the uk and abroad do not keep their facial hair, im sure the gurus wouldnt ahve wanted their daughters to face such humiliation as waking around looking like an ape, as well as the fact that because the gurus got married it is our duty to also do so, and that may nbot be possible if ur growing a beard!!!! lol. but some people keep it out of choice and resepct to them for showing such committment and dedication against odds.

anyways its all a matter of what u believe and think. goodluck on ur journey.

but if its just hair on the head that counts our senghs wud be running around with waxed chests,shaved legs,slinky arms - and thas not gna look v impressive!!i agree with maha_moorakh that the rules are the same for both women and men kesh is kesh, and if i do chaak amrit i think i'd like 2 be strong enough to keep evry single hair ... i agree with what u said about western diet/water 2 many hormones in everything nowadays, like in plastic bottle containers, plastic packaging,processed foods.... but thats our fault. we did that to ourselves....mannnn maybe i should be bibeki so im not consuming extra hormones.

BTW - 4 any bibi who has hormonal probs, u can take evening primrose supplements which can regulate ur hormones so everything is balanced as its meant to be

look at me blabbing awayyyy- o yeah also there is a saying in gurbani- that i will follow the guru no matter who laughs at me...something along those lines i cant remember of the top of my head - i knowwwww im useless :D lol

thank u to the person who explained the naam "swap" to me i getitttttt now

[Guest a moni cntd]

o jes i 4got-

in regards to the marriage/hair thing, beauty is the eye of the beholder- a sikh guy would totally understand and resect that about u, so thats not rly an issue for me cuz i dont think a true chardikala singh would refuse 2 marry me cuz im hairy... hmmm

u know, sometimes i think to myself,that we as moni girls have more of a problem accepting OURSELVES in our true form then other ppl, we pass it off as haww i dno what my siblings/cousins will say, boys take the mick outta me etc but when u luk deeeeeeeeeeeeep inside u realise we r often our own worst enemies.. :D

[s_kaur!]

vaheguroo jee ka khalsa vaheguroo jee ki fateh

penji i wouldnt say you are doomed because guru jee has shown his kirpa on you and you are going towards sikhi. i was in a similar situation aswell, iv been brought up in a typical punjabi type of family, i was thought abou sikhi but that depth was never there of what sikhi really is about and den with guru jees kirpa me n my brother changed, jus like you are. Fair enough you have that fear that what if you back out but trust me when you take that one step towards guru jee he'll take thousands/millions towards you without no doubt. Go and meet your local sangat that is in sikhi and ull find alot of singhnia out there to help you with any problems and are there always to talk to you. before i came into sikhi i didnt really see the sangat i was always away from it, to be honest i hadnt even seen singhnia before. gradually i started to meet sangat through camps, keertan programmes etc .. (GO TO CAMPS, MEET THE SANGAT ETCS AND ASK DEM THE QUESTIONS and get it all cleared, i would say talkin face to face will be more clearer and at the same time sikhsangat is also a guidens from what the sangat says on this forum). okay i think im going of the topic abit but what im tryin to say is .. the fear of u failin or breakin away from sikhi can be solved, when you have the sangat and vaheguroo with you, you feel stronger.

AND the issued about the facial hair and your sister and mum laughin at you, well i had that same problem but you'll get used to it and they wil shut up after a while, thats the test hunna we have to pass it, and not listen to stupid coments from people, jus ignore em. In the end we have to see are we making Vaheguroo happy is it right what we are doing, and read bani ull have you answer do ardass to guru jee youll get you answer. vaheguroo is always there!

AND japping naam and readin bani before takin amrit will be counted, and guru jee will know that you are doing with pyaar for vaheguroo and hopefully you will take amrit in this life from what you are sayin. BUT DONT BE DOUBTFUL, clear it out,ask another gursikh if you want something answered ask guru jee and he will show the right way, wateva BANI SAYS IS TRUEE AND HUKAM FROM VAHEGUROO.

penjee im a moni too and im goin through the time were like parents are startin to stop me from goin into sikhi too much, well they are happy me n bro in sikhi but they are not acceptin that i want to wear dastaar, they acceptin me to take amrit without dastaar but i knw dats wrong and im NOT going to that, so im like after while always tryin to explain to them its hard but its guru jees kirpa hunna itll gradually get there and well be able to take amrit soon and be part of the khalsa.. thats guru jees test never let anything like dis breakk you down or any other situations, in the end do ARDAS to vaheguroo and im sure guru jee will fulfill your ardas, jus never give up!.. SIKHI IS A BEAUTIFUL PATHWAY(faith) TO REACH VAHEGUROO!

GURU JEE IS ALWAYS THERE TO GUIDE YOU!

Sorry if i have said anything wrong or not answered what you wanted to know. :D please forgive this moorakh for any mistakes and do please correct for any mistakes, bhul chuk marf.

AND yes i totally agree with what penji ('maha_moorakh') has said... DONT remove your lovely kes given by vaheguroo .. no matter what others say, in da end onli what vaheguroo says is true, and it said that removin your hair one of the Bhujjar kurehits den dat baiscally means DONT DO IT! vaheguroo !

bhul chuk marf

vaheguroo jee ka khalsa vaheguroo jee ki fateh

[khalsaforce]

Bibis need to worry less there are lots of chardi kala singhs who don't give a damn if you have facial hair, or if you do your eyebrows, etc. Be natural and be the truest sikh you can be and yuo will have nothing to worry about. Worry about sikhi not human body!

[kaur_khalistani_lioness]

my family is holding me back from sikhi - ( here i go making shitty excuses!) as in i doubt they would accept it they are punjabi and alot of people in my extended family are very much concerned with outward appearance. i once grew my eyebrows and pretended i couldnt be bothered to thread them - that i was too busy studying to worry about things like that - my mom and sister laughed at me!!! (in jest they didnt mean it a nasty way and probably didnt realise it offended me) they did the same when i didnt remove hair from my legs.. there was a time when i would remove it every week now i can go 4 months without touching it

i nver realized how lucky i have been. but i/we all hv had our share of people talkin about our "hairy" legs etc(jus others who ddint know about the culture). i could careless about desiz, because when they said anything (or say stuff) behind my back...my soul knew/know tat i was on teh right path. and we know inside that our peope know that too...but they have nevr experienced the love of excepting theirsefz the way they are! yes at time our mind does let us down....and make us wonder about how the world runs. thats why our guru sahib wrote bani for us to guide us, and told us to be in sadh sangat. even if you find few people who have love for waheguru...u will be fine! jus dont make them ur role model... smily admire their love for waheguru and collect the good things from them! kno that we all are learning, and sometimes we will make mistakes. if we didnt how would we learn? only a perfect person ,knower of all, can;t make mistakes, which is waheguru alone. family will accept u when u are strong and know whats right. when they see the love inside of u and ur changing for good!

outward appearence does count BUT only in the eyes of those who are under the illusion. gurbani says "saye jun sohney jou vaho karen" this thing about "beauty" has always been there. but the learned and deep thinkers(seekers of the truth) wil only see the true beauty within each individual. even if u wanna look at it from Punjabi culture view point, people appreciated others gun(virtues) more than their outside beauty. thats why these peopel were called "siyaney"(bajuragh or wise who have experince and know whats right and wrong)

anyhow....i think u already got the point with kirpa

its not just the hair stuff , sometimes im scared of failing in my sikhi...what if i cant live up to it?

what if i fail as a khalsa..

yea it happens. but u have to let the doer of all take care of u. he is our creator and will take care of us, will make us stronger. failer is part of life...but im not sure if a GURSIKH would see even failure as a failure(chardi kalla=postive thinking). umm but sometimes u will feel like it. be aware that thatz the time when the universe is trying to teach you a lesson(s). waheguru nevr judges. the simple truth is whatver u do, u will have to accept the fruit of it( whatver you sou, so shall u reap). guru sahib has only good for us in his "store" hehehe.He wants us to live a GREAT happy(blissful) life!!! we all want that but some of us use our own muth nd think we know what a great life is! and at the end of it we realize we nevr actually GOT TO LIVE TO TEH FULLEST! we were too worried abut what people might think or perceive us. instead of living our life we were trying to live a life LIKE THEM. we dont want to but it jus happens...cuz we arenlt awre of it.

taking amrit is just first step, other things come after that. after amrit u can live the life that u hve nevr dreamed of. secretless and worry free life (KHALSA AKALPURAKH KI Fauj Pargtiyo Khalsa PrMatm ki moujh)=khalsa is worry free(i know doesn't seem like it these days. need to keep in mind that there are very few who are -jivan mukhat)

so only lookup to the perfect AKAL and ask for sandh sangat in ur ardas.

there is lot more to say but its all written in the gurbani!

bhul chuk muaf karni

and ardas may waheguru keep us in HISSANGAT