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Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh!!!!

ok erm.... i knw this gurl yer...we had a camp couple of months ago n shes realy into sikhi now...but her paretns r putting her down..thev stopped her coming to gurudwara and she snot been able to learn path etc...one of her fmaily memebrs r getting married and she has to attend that wedding becuse she being forced to...also they said shes got to tkae her patka off....cut her facial hair....dance etc wear a lenga at the wedding she relay dont wnat to she in tears!!!! n i jst siad dnt go buh she says theyl force her etc...and ive even siad let my parents talk to them shes says no cuse theyl prob treat her worse than there treating her now...she says they say why dont u bleech them..ur not cutting them....its just for one day buh if hse does it once theyl keep aksin her ova n ova agin to di it agian n again so please some 1 give me advise n tel me what i should tel ehr to do!!!! ive asked her to keep doing ardas!!! plz healp

Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru ji ki fateh!!!

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Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh!!!!

ok erm.... i knw this gurl yer...we had a camp couple of months ago n shes realy into sikhi now...but her paretns r putting her down..thev stopped her coming to gurudwara and she snot been able to learn path etc...one of her fmaily memebrs r getting married and she has to attend that wedding becuse she being forced to...also they said shes got to tkae her patka off....cut her facial hair....dance etc wear a lenga at the wedding she relay dont wnat to she in tears!!!! n i jst siad dnt go buh she says theyl force her etc...and ive even siad let my parents talk to them shes says no cuse theyl prob treat her worse than there treating her now...she says they say why dont u bleech them..ur not cutting them....its just for one day buh if hse does it once theyl keep aksin her ova n ova agin to di it agian n again so please some 1 give me advise n tel me what i should tel ehr to do!!!! ive asked her to keep doing ardas!!! plz healp

Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru ji ki fateh!!!

erm bhenji how old is she?-----------that'll prolly set up if she can argue for not being treated so?

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Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh!!!!

ok erm.... i knw this gurl yer...we had a camp couple of months ago n shes realy into sikhi now...but her paretns r putting her down..thev stopped her coming to gurudwara and she snot been able to learn path etc...one of her fmaily memebrs r getting married and she has to attend that wedding becuse she being forced to...also they said shes got to tkae her patka off....cut her facial hair....dance etc wear a lenga at the wedding she relay dont wnat to she in tears!!!! n i jst siad dnt go buh she says theyl force her etc...and ive even siad let my parents talk to them shes says no cuse theyl prob treat her worse than there treating her now...she says they say why dont u bleech them..ur not cutting them....its just for one day buh if hse does it once theyl keep aksin her ova n ova agin to di it agian n again so please some 1 give me advise n tel me what i should tel ehr to do!!!! ive asked her to keep doing ardas!!! plz healp

Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru ji ki fateh!!!

erm bhenji how old is she?-----------that'll prolly set up if she can argue for not being treated so?

erm shes 15 goin to be 16 in october. i they do cut iher hair she says hsel neva wear patka agin...

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Gurfetah!

You hit the nail on the end there penji - do Ardas.

I was in a similar situation as all my family are the typical punjabi makeup-wearing/hair cutting/party going/drinking kind of people so I did find it really hard when I started to keep my kesh. Because for girls alot of clothes/jewellery/shoes that you may have worn before has to all change now too. So it is a big change to everyone around us.

Anyway, I had alot of grief from family members for ages, sometimes it would be so unbearable. But I sticked at it. They would say that I should stay 'medium' but I thought I am either gonna do it 100% or not at all. I would cry to Guruji and do Ardas but it would still be the same. Then soon after it all just changed. Now I can't even believe they where the same peopel then. They don't say anything to me anymore and more importantly my parents have accepted it all. I think its all just a test to see how much pyar you really have for Guruji because we all know that he is never gonna abondon his Sikh. And Sikhi is a game of love. It's about giving your head to Guruji and accepting everything he throws at you.

Tell her that you understand its hard but you need to keep at it and eventually they will all accept it. Since then I have heard of loads of people who had the same family problem at start but with your commitment and pyar towards your rehat and Bani, it does eventually go away. When they see that Sikhi is changing you into a much better person...they would rather have you this way.

I can't remember where but I once read somewhere that if you want Sikhi your gonna have to fight for it and at first you will encounter loads of problems. Look at all the grief our Guru Sahibs went through in past for their Sikhi. And thats all because it is worth the struggle.

All I want to say is please don't give up no matter how hard it gets. Keep your faith in Guruji and he will help you. Sorry this was so long. She can PM me if she needs someone to talk to...

May Guruji help her into Sikhi.

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Gurfetah!

You hit the nail on the end there penji - do Ardas.

I was in a similar situation as all my family are the typical punjabi makeup-wearing/hair cutting/party going/drinking kind of people so I did find it really hard when I started to keep my kesh. Because for girls alot of clothes/jewellery/shoes that you may have worn before has to all change now too. So it is a big change to everyone around us.

Anyway, I had alot of grief from family members for ages, sometimes it would be so unbearable. But I sticked at it. They would say that I should stay 'medium' but I thought I am either gonna do it 100% or not at all. I would cry to Guruji and do Ardas but it would still be the same. Then soon after it all just changed. Now I can't even believe they where the same peopel then. They don't say anything to me anymore and more importantly my parents have accepted it all. I think its all just a test to see how much pyar you really have for Guruji because we all know that he is never gonna abondon his Sikh. And Sikhi is a game of love. It's about giving your head to Guruji and accepting everything he throws at you.

Tell her that you understand its hard but you need to keep at it and eventually they will all accept it. Since then I have heard of loads of people who had the same family problem at start but with your commitment and pyar towards your rehat and Bani, it does eventually go away. When they see that Sikhi is changing you into a much better person...they would rather have you this way.

I can't remember where but I once read somewhere that if you want Sikhi your gonna have to fight for it and at first you will encounter loads of problems. Look at all the grief our Guru Sahibs went through in past for their Sikhi. And thats all because it is worth the struggle.

All I want to say is please don't give up no matter how hard it gets. Keep your faith in Guruji and he will help you. Sorry this was so long. She can PM me if she needs someone to talk to...

May Guruji help her into Sikhi.

yer behnji she soo strong i kwn she wont give up!, shes got one problem man n tha is she got so much pyar n respect for her family tha she cnt do anything to heart her fmily,,,ave even said ot her who lwd u rather make happy guru ji or paretns....ave tried explaning to her tha there wil alwayz be sume one trying to stop u geting into siklhi n geting closer to guru ji! she knows tha now n mabi wil unda stnd she got to stand up this tym...huna?...the onli problem is i dno wah i shld tle ehr to do for this wedding????

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Well I am glad she has got you to talk to Warrior Princess coz you have got your had screwed on right. :)

The wedding is a close family member so she will have to go and thats fine. In Sikhi rehat is very important so she has to put that first. Tell her to go to the wedding by all means but make it clear to her family that she is not going to cut her hair because she really don't want to. It is now time for her to show her family that she is serious about this and once they realise that they will all back off - trust me.

Like you said there is always gonna be at least one person out there who is gonna put you down. She has to stand up now because the sooner she does it - the better it will be for her. There are always going to be family weddings so she has to stand up sooner or later.

Tell her to sit down with her parents and explain in a calm loving way why she does not want to cut her hair. I understand she loves her parents very much but to be straight - Guruji always has to come first.

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dyiK kutMbu moih loBwxw clidAw nwil n jweI ]

dhaekh kutanmb mohi lobhaanaa chaladhiaa naal n jaaee ||

Beholding your family, you are lured away by emotional attachment, but when you leave, they will not go with you.

jnin ipqw lok suq binqw koie n iks kI DirAw ]

janan pithaa lok suth banithaa koe n kis kee dhhariaa ||

Mothers, fathers, friends, children and spouses-no one is the support of anyone else.

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dyiK kutMbu moih loBwxw clidAw nwil n jweI ]

dhaekh kutanmb mohi lobhaanaa chaladhiaa naal n jaaee ||

Beholding your family, you are lured away by emotional attachment, but when you leave, they will not go with you.

jnin ipqw lok suq binqw koie n iks kI DirAw ]

janan pithaa lok suth banithaa koe n kis kee dhhariaa ||

Mothers, fathers, friends, children and spouses-no one is the support of anyone else.

fateh ji

im going to give her my [password for sikhsnagat...so she can read the posts mabi il help he r abit n is she wnt to write anything il let u kwn if it her or me lol thanx:)

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dyiK kutMbu moih loBwxw clidAw nwil n jweI ]

dhaekh kutanmb mohi lobhaanaa chaladhiaa naal n jaaee ||

Beholding your family, you are lured away by emotional attachment, but when you leave, they will not go with you.

jnin ipqw lok suq binqw koie n iks kI DirAw ]

janan pithaa lok suth banithaa koe n kis kee dhhariaa ||

Mothers, fathers, friends, children and spouses-no one is the support of anyone else.

<BR>dyiK kutMbu moih loBwxw clidAw nwil n jweI ]<BR>dhaekh kutanmb mohi lobhaanaa chaladhiaa naal n jaaee ||<BR>Beholding your family, you are lured away by emotional attachment, but when you leave, they will not go with you.<BR><BR>jnin ipqw lok suq binqw koie n iks kI DirAw ]<BR>janan pithaa lok suth banithaa koe n kis kee dhhariaa ||<BR>Mothers, fathers, friends, children and spouses-no one is the support of anyone else.<BR>
<BR><BR>
<BR>dyiK kutMbu moih loBwxw clidAw nwil n jweI ]<BR>dhaekh kutanmb mohi lobhaanaa chaladhiaa naal n jaaee ||<BR>Beholding your family, you are lured away by emotional attachment, but when you leave, they will not go with you.<BR><BR>jnin ipqw lok suq binqw koie n iks kI DirAw ]<BR>janan pithaa lok suth banithaa koe n kis kee dhhariaa ||<BR>Mothers, fathers, friends, children and spouses-no one is the support of anyone else.<BR>
<BR>you r absolutely rite jio...............at the end there is gonna be no one for us except for guruji.............this is exactly what i had thought when my parents were not allowing me to get baptized and stuff........<BR>there was just one thing in ma mind.......ham moorakh mugadh sarnaagti.........when i m in his sharan afterall why do i have to fear of any hurdle .......he himself will take thousands of steps to cum and take me if i take one step towards him..........and my mukti lies in him and not ma parents..........<BR><BR><BR><BR>
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