Hindu Festivals And Rituals

[Hardeep__singh]

Now I am beginning to get a sense that my sis in law does'nt know her own identity. She observed and did the fast of Hindus, and now she sent me a text for happy dushera, I sent her a text back with Happy Gurpurub of Guru Ram Das ji! She is loosing her marbles, and at one point at my friends house I said are you eating she goes no and I said why, she goes shes fasting and cant eat onion and garlic and some other stuff and cant touch what we have eat, and in front of my friends she embarassed me as she is a Sikh.

I respect everyones believe but to go to that length what she does is beyond me, what advice would you give and what can I do? She rarely listens and doesnt listen to her own sister, my wife. I have told my wife there is no room for rituals or fasting, she doesnt do it anyway...Guru Jis messages is simple, eat and live simple.

[Singhstah]

That's really quite upsetting when Guroo Sahib has already saved us from this dubidha. May Guroo Ji keep us all in his sharan.

Show the gurbani tuks

ਭੈਰਉ ਮਹਲਾ ੫ ॥

Bẖairo mėhlā 5.

Bhairao, Fifth Mehl:

ਵਰਤ ਨ ਰਹਉ ਨ ਮਹ ਰਮਦਾਨਾ ॥

varaṯ na raha▫o na mah ramḏānā.

I do not keep fasts, nor do I observe the month of Ramadaan.

ਤਿਸੁ ਸੇਵੀ ਜੋ ਰਖੈ ਨਿਦਾਨਾ ॥੧॥

Ŧis sevī jo rakẖai niḏānā. ||1||

I serve only the One, who will protect me in the end. ||1||

ਏਕੁ ਗੁਸਾਈ ਅਲਹੁ ਮੇਰਾ ॥

Ėk gusā▫ī alhu merā.

The One Lord, the Lord of the World, is my God Allah.

ਹਿੰਦੂ ਤੁਰਕ ਦੁਹਾਂ ਨੇਬੇਰਾ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥

Hinḏū ṯurak ḏuhāʼn neberā. ||1|| rahā▫o.

He administers justice to both Hindus and Muslims. ||1||Pause||

ਹਜ ਕਾਬੈ ਜਾਉ ਨ ਤੀਰਥ ਪੂਜਾ ॥

Haj kābai jā▫o na ṯirath pūjā.

I do not make pilgrimages to Mecca, nor do I worship at Hindu sacred shrines.

ਏਕੋ ਸੇਵੀ ਅਵਰੁ ਨ ਦੂਜਾ ॥੨॥

Ėko sevī avar na ḏūjā. ||2||

I serve the One Lord, and not any other. ||2||

ਪੂਜਾ ਕਰਉ ਨ ਨਿਵਾਜ ਗੁਜਾਰਉ ॥

Pūjā kara▫o na nivāj gujāra▫o.

I do not perform Hindu worship services, nor do I offer the Muslim prayers.

ਏਕ ਨਿਰੰਕਾਰ ਲੇ ਰਿਦੈ ਨਮਸਕਾਰਉ ॥੩॥

Ėk nirankār le riḏai namaskāra▫o. ||3||

I have taken the One Formless Lord into my heart; I humbly worship Him there. ||3||

ਨਾ ਹਮ ਹਿੰਦੂ ਨ ਮੁਸਲਮਾਨ ॥

Nā ham hinḏū na musalmān.

I am not a Hindu, nor am I a Muslim.

ਅਲਹ ਰਾਮ ਕੇ ਪਿੰਡੁ ਪਰਾਨ ॥੪॥

Alah rām ke pind parān. ||4||

My body and breath of life belong to Allah - to Raam - the God of both. ||4||

ਕਹੁ ਕਬੀਰ ਇਹੁ ਕੀਆ ਵਖਾਨਾ ॥

Kaho Kabīr ih kī▫ā vakẖānā.

Says Kabeer, this is what I say:

ਗੁਰ ਪੀਰ ਮਿਲਿ ਖੁਦਿ ਖਸਮੁ ਪਛਾਨਾ ॥੫॥੩॥

Gur pīr mil kẖuḏ kẖasam pacẖẖānā. ||5||3||

meeting with the Guru, my Spiritual Teacher, I realize God, my Lord and Master. ||5||3||

[Hardeep__singh]

That's really quite upsetting when Guroo Sahib has already saved us from this dubidha. May Guroo Ji keep us all in his sharan.

Show the gurbani tuks

ਭੈਰਉ ਮਹਲਾ ੫ ॥

Bẖairo mėhlā 5.

Bhairao, Fifth Mehl:

ਵਰਤ ਨ ਰਹਉ ਨ ਮਹ ਰਮਦਾਨਾ ॥

varaṯ na raha▫o na mah ramḏānā.

I do not keep fasts, nor do I observe the month of Ramadaan.

ਤਿਸੁ ਸੇਵੀ ਜੋ ਰਖੈ ਨਿਦਾਨਾ ॥੧॥

Ŧis sevī jo rakẖai niḏānā. ||1||

I serve only the One, who will protect me in the end. ||1||

ਏਕੁ ਗੁਸਾਈ ਅਲਹੁ ਮੇਰਾ ॥

Ėk gusā▫ī alhu merā.

The One Lord, the Lord of the World, is my God Allah.

ਹਿੰਦੂ ਤੁਰਕ ਦੁਹਾਂ ਨੇਬੇਰਾ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥

Hinḏū ṯurak ḏuhāʼn neberā. ||1|| rahā▫o.

He administers justice to both Hindus and Muslims. ||1||Pause||

ਹਜ ਕਾਬੈ ਜਾਉ ਨ ਤੀਰਥ ਪੂਜਾ ॥

Haj kābai jā▫o na ṯirath pūjā.

I do not make pilgrimages to Mecca, nor do I worship at Hindu sacred shrines.

ਏਕੋ ਸੇਵੀ ਅਵਰੁ ਨ ਦੂਜਾ ॥੨॥

Ėko sevī avar na ḏūjā. ||2||

I serve the One Lord, and not any other. ||2||

ਪੂਜਾ ਕਰਉ ਨ ਨਿਵਾਜ ਗੁਜਾਰਉ ॥

Pūjā kara▫o na nivāj gujāra▫o.

I do not perform Hindu worship services, nor do I offer the Muslim prayers.

ਏਕ ਨਿਰੰਕਾਰ ਲੇ ਰਿਦੈ ਨਮਸਕਾਰਉ ॥੩॥

Ėk nirankār le riḏai namaskāra▫o. ||3||

I have taken the One Formless Lord into my heart; I humbly worship Him there. ||3||

ਨਾ ਹਮ ਹਿੰਦੂ ਨ ਮੁਸਲਮਾਨ ॥

Nā ham hinḏū na musalmān.

I am not a Hindu, nor am I a Muslim.

ਅਲਹ ਰਾਮ ਕੇ ਪਿੰਡੁ ਪਰਾਨ ॥੪॥

Alah rām ke pind parān. ||4||

My body and breath of life belong to Allah - to Raam - the God of both. ||4||

ਕਹੁ ਕਬੀਰ ਇਹੁ ਕੀਆ ਵਖਾਨਾ ॥

Kaho Kabīr ih kī▫ā vakẖānā.

Says Kabeer, this is what I say:

ਗੁਰ ਪੀਰ ਮਿਲਿ ਖੁਦਿ ਖਸਮੁ ਪਛਾਨਾ ॥੫॥੩॥

Gur pīr mil kẖuḏ kẖasam pacẖẖānā. ||5||3||

meeting with the Guru, my Spiritual Teacher, I realize God, my Lord and Master. ||5||3||

I will try IF she listens, she doesnt listen to me, in thru one ear and out the other....shes going crazy and becoming more and more acustomed to hindu rituals and its embarassing me as I keep my turban as a crown. I have told my wife that she needs to be taught about Sikhi and stuff, I did talk to my sis in law tactfully but she too much engrossed in the rituals.

[buddasingh]

Remind yourself that your extended family, and sometimes immediate family, does not always define who you are. Do not try to control that otherwise you're in for a losing battle.

Tell her you have some questions and curiosities. Tell her you want to learn and understand where she's coming from. Sit down listen to her and encourage her to talk asking only enough to facilitate her speaking. DO NOT offer advice, tell her what you think, give her your opinion etc. Do this with sincerity and not as a tactic of any sort. Say nothing to her to rebut or reply for the next 3-4 weeks or the next 3 to 4 times you see her, whichever period is longer.

If you do the above, you'll find yourself in a much better space to think about this clearly and determine how you relate to her longer term.

[Guest Guest]

Just ask her what you hope to acheive from rituals. Then when she gives you an answer, you can say did you manage to acheive it then? If she says no then you can say how in sikhi we are told thar ritualts are useless, and by worshipping the one unique god we can acheive anything we want.

But if she says that she did acheive what she wanted from doing rituals, then im not really sure. Maybe after a while of doing it she will see for herself it was useless. But i mean if she has brainwashed herself and you really want to help, then you can do ardas for her.

[KHaNdA_NaTioN]

Give her a new nickname: Bibi HINDU RANI THE FOURTH

hahahah jk :D