How To Survive University?

[Guest Goan123]

Does anyone know how to survive there lol, all students think about is going for a pint and partying. Has anyone been to Uni and found that if you say no, everyone will eventually get used to it and stop pestering you lol????

[Hau Apraadhi]

VJKK VJKF

Yep, I've found that if you say no, everyone will eventually get used to it and stop pestering you I always say no to everyone saying anything like "just come chill in the uni pub thing wiv us", and even though they dont go there to drink and genuinely go there to chill i tell them straight, im a Singh mate so no there aint no chance im goin in that place so they're lyk safe then, then i go and walk around on my own which is good because i'm away from manmat sangat even though most of them are 'sikhs' themselves! But yh its easy as long as you have the guts to say no and stand up for your Sikhi, for yourself. Hope that helped

VJKK VJKF

[Guest london boy]

I used to go only to play pool and have coke, you dont want to give goray impression that we are like muslims, not mixing into society

do what ever feels comfortable

[Tera]

I commuted to and from Uni (around 1 hours drive) as preferred the option to stay at home. Whilst there, you would get offers to go out constantly and even though it may have seemed a bit antisocial I would always refuse any offers of pubs/clubs etc. Would head with them into town, shops, go play pool etc though.

After a while they figured out what I would and wouldnt do and stopped asking. Yes, sometimes you'd feel a slight outsider as sometimes talk would be centered around what they did last night and going tonight etc but didnt bother me at all.

You just need to be firm and stand your ground. Think before you even go what you will and wont do and stick to it rigidly. If you start to give an inch, before you know it you'll have gone a mile and its a downward spiral. Also try and find good like minded sangat, try and go to your Sikh Society and local Gurdwaras / Sikh Organisations. Above all Ardaas, and remember, Maharaaj is always with you

[Hau Apraadhi]

I commuted to and from Uni (around 1 hours drive) as preferred the option to stay at home. Whilst there, you would get offers to go out constantly and even though it may have seemed a bit antisocial I would always refuse any offers of pubs/clubs etc. Would head with them into town, shops, go play pool etc though.

After a while they figured out what I would and wouldnt do and stopped asking. Yes, sometimes you'd feel a slight outsider as sometimes talk would be centered around what they did last night and going tonight etc but didnt bother me at all.

You just need to be firm and stand your ground. Think before you even go what you will and wont do and stick to it rigidly. If you start to give an inch, before you know it you'll have gone a mile and its a downward spiral. Also try and find good like minded sangat, try and go to your Sikh Society and local Gurdwaras / Sikh Organisations. Above all Ardaas, and remember, Maharaaj is always with you

Same situation with me ^^^

[Guest difficult]

Hi everyone

Well at the start of uni when I used to drink I used to love going to clubs etc, only the first few times though, then I started to actually pay attention to waht was going on around me, theres a vibe in a club that is horrible and when I was drunk the first time I didn't notice, then I had to get drunk every single time to enjoy myself b/c I oculdnt stand being sober in that place, although being drunk was not much better. I hated the sick feeling and taste and cried every time I got home becuase I wanted to be a good sikh but felt out of control.

Then I stopped drinking and my friends forced me to go out with them, I usually went out with 1 friend and she would say she would go thre alone and meet up with friends if I didnt go with her in an unlicenced cab so I used to have to go with her.

Then I stopped hanging out with her and made another friend that only began drinking when she started uni, a year below me but the same age. At this point I had been sober for a while and was very into sikhi and this friend appealed to me because she was very religious and said she would stop drinking, she also suffered from severe depression and I helped her alot. But she didnt stop drinking she said shed go alone to clubs if I didnt go with her and meet up with friends there. She used to put me on massive guilt trips, saying she was depressed and needed to go out, I used to ask her to go to diff places like restraunts etc but she always said she needed to dance cuz she loved it. She suffered frm severe depression which only I knew about and even if our other friends were going out she always said she needed me there with her or shed get like crazy upset.

I never drank that yr but hated going to these places where people were rowdy and acted like demons.

One day she said shed stop drinking and I was really happy and she didnt for a while but then had one. She promised again she wouldnt but she did again a while later.

The thing is that satguru nanak dev ji said dont hang out with people like this becuase some of their dirt will rub off on you, and I havent called her in ages and feel so much happier. This may be off topic, but I feel like shes got her life sorted now and doesnt really need me. She was also very insecure and she used to try and put me down aswell sometimes until I put her in her place but I know she loved me as a friend and misses me. Her boyfriend is a really bad influence on her and she would have given up drinking if it wern't for him.

But shes not going to stop drinking and her boyfriend and now our other frineds think im a goody two shoes, my friend doesnt though and always says she respects me and wishes she could be like me.

Should I still be friends with her or not? I just dont know.

Oh and btw with the whole drinking thing, It wasnt THAT bad, but for some crazy reason some people think theyre better than u if dont drink and worship kalyug and not what is good.

My friends thought I was too much of a good girl, although I knew it was jealousy, I saw that anytime the girls I knew felt insecure stepping outside in front of guys etc, theyd light up a cigarette and then they'd start walking taller acting more confident, I felt that they just hated the fact I didnt need it to feel secure. Theyd also get their egos boostd by talking about drink like it were the clothing on their backs, like it was a huge part of them and their pride, I dont understand why such a dirty and unholy habit is bragged about, it made me feel sick.

[REDRUM]

This is timetable that I use at uni and am still following it:

Depending on your uni timetable you'll need to adapt as some days you might have 9-5 days and some days off etc.

On 9-5 days follow this:

2am- wake up have ishnaan

2.40-8.30- go Gurdwara

8.30-9.00- get to uni

In my course we have breaks in the 9-5 sessions rather then going back to my dorm go to the library and study.

5.00-5.30- talk to friends

5.30-6.00-go to your dorm

6.00-7.30- study

8.00- 10pm- go gurdwara

10.20-2.00 am- sleep

Also sometimes I have naps in the afternoon for an hour.

On days off

2am- 10am - have ishnaan and go gurdwara

10.30-12.30- nap

12.30-2.20- study

3.00- 8 pm- gurdwara

8.30- 10pm- study

10pm-2am- sleep

This timetable I personally follow and I recommend you follow it but obviously make adjustments according to your course.

*Also remember to relax and take time to do what you enjoy*

[Guest paapi]

What about freshers week and ..... pub crawls!!! especially pub crawls that include everyone on your course...

[SunSingh]

if someone makes you feel bad for following gurmat, they are bad sangat to be around. doesn't matter how good a friend they are, doesn't matter if they claim to respect that you're into sikhi. look at their actions and how they make you feel, does it match up with their words?

i had similar friends, i slowly distanced myself from them and felt much better and progressed more in sikhi.

btw, depression or not, the one sending u on guilt trips is using manipulation. be careful around people like that.

[whyhellothere]

if someone makes you feel bad for following gurmat, they are bad sangat to be around. doesn't matter how good a friend they are, doesn't matter if they claim to respect that you're into sikhi. look at their actions and how they make you feel, does it match up with their words?

i had similar friends, i slowly distanced myself from them and felt much better and progressed more in sikhi.

btw, depression or not, the one sending u on guilt trips is using manipulation. be careful around people like that.

Okay thanks for your help,

also sorry to ask another question, what about family? I mean I aviod certain members of my family as much as possible b/c I cant stand their vibes and know they dont want me to be into sikhi. Innately I feel like they dont want me to progress. I dont feel peace even being in the same house as them.I just want to know if this is wrong as we're meant to live a householders life, but some of them are just so into kaljug that I cant stand it.