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waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh

sangat ji please help. my husband is not amirthdhari. i did take khande di pahul after my marriage, without telling him. Now i am asking my husband to take khande de pahul. if he wants to keep relationship with me he always started argue with me whenever i ask him, should i go pesh or still wait for him

gurfateh ji

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waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh

sangat ji please help. my husband is not amirthdhari. i did take khande di pahul after my marriage, without telling him. Now i am asking my husband to take khande de pahul. if he wants to keep relationship with me he always started argue with me whenever i ask him, should i go pesh or still wait for him

gurfateh ji

I understand the need for couples to be on the same page in gurmat spirituality. But thats idealistic wish not always realistic or karamic feasible(we all born with different karams). Enforcing amrit on the spouse who is not yet ready is not only be damaging to your relationship but also not right (as we believe ultimately in surrender to Satguru via love not by fear mongering unlike many muslims) and hindrance to your own gurmat spiritual journey.

Gurmat way would be live by example of gurmukh who lets truth-sat-gyan take center stage of their being and have gurmukh jevan speak and reflect for itself which automatically draw others into marg by love not fear. Awakened love of Gurmukh is of like magnet, just by its mere presence it will draw all needles close by in very naturally, automatically, spontaneously. But unfortunately instead of taking inspiration from gurmukh examples, we rather strategize and play all these silly, pity, enforcement, strategize games which not only fails but have adverse affect on people and puts off people all together.

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I understand the need for couples to be on the same page in gurmat spirituality. But thats idealistic wish not always realistic or karamic feasible(we all born with different karams). Enforcing amrit on the spouse who is not yet ready is not only be damaging to your relationship but also not right (as we believe ultimately in surrender to Satguru via love not by fear mongering unlike many muslims) and hindrance to your own gurmat spiritual journey.

Gurmat way would be live by example of gurmukh who lets truth-sat-gyan take center stage of their being and have gurmukh jevan speak and reflect for itself which automatically draw others into marg by love not fear. Awakened love of Gurmukh is of like magnet, just by its mere presence it will draw all needles close by in very naturally, automatically, spontaneously. But unfortunately instead of taking inspiration from gurmukh examples, we rather strategize and play all these silly, pity, enforcement, strategize games which not only fails but have adverse affect on people and puts off people all together.

I think I didn't make it clear in my post, but I meant that she should bring her husband to come in front of the panj pyare to resolve the arguing between the couple, not merely to make him chak amrit as that is up to his own choice. But to stop the arguing, panj pyare should be there to end this conflict between this couple before anything else gets worse.

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