SENIORS' MARRAIGE

[Guest Fakester]

So many loop holes, the trolls tripped himself up.

[Guest Reasonable]

Although you may not like this lady it is really unfair for you to assume your father should live out his days alone.

[Guest Random]

On 9/29/2020 at 2:51 AM, Guest Reasonable said:

Although you may not like this lady it is really unfair for you to assume your father should live out his days alone.

True.. maybe that lady is not so nice with others but it might work with your father.. It is easy to live alone but really hard to spend your life when you feel lonely.. Living alone and feeling lonely are two different things..

If it won't work, your father will have a lesson for life and if it will work..it is great for everyone...

[Markgateshead]

On 9/24/2020 at 1:15 PM, Guest Waheguru's Child said:

Hello,

I am writing regarding Seniors Sikhs who are getting married at the age of 60+.It is about my father who is talking with someone from a long time.MY mother passed away few years back and my father started talking to some lady within few weeks after my mom's death.I was so close to my mom so it was a big challenge for me to accept him talking and dating someone at this age.He is 60+ and is seeing this person from last few years and I was just hoping he will stop this all. Some of our relatives know this lady and they didn't have very good reviews about her.

I mean I understand that my father feels lonely and needs some companionship but he doesn't need to marry someone. I explained him all this and he told me that the lady is asking him to marry her or just end this relation now. She is kind of into fame and show off and my father is not that smart to see it. That woman was sending pics to my dad and calling every day and that time her husband was alive. Unfortunately her husband passed away after a year or something. Her children know about her relation and they are okay with it. My father is not seeing the reality. I don't live with my father and do not really expect anything from him like financial support or his money but I am just worried that he might end up with nothing.

I asked him nicely that maybe we can find someone he can talk to as a friend but he was so mad and did some emotional drama that he is sad and I don't care about his happiness.He wants her and that is it. I felt like I was dealing with some teenager not a senior. I am not that narrow minded person but it is still so hard  to accept this all. I have tried my best to show him the right version of life but he sees nothing other than her life with that new partner. 

I am exhausted now. Sometimes I tell myself to let it be but then again many things start bothering me. My father was not that polite with my mother and she had hard time. She requested him many times to have a better lifestyle , quit alcohol, spend time with us but he was never interested. Now I really feel he never respected her before and even after her death. I know I am so attached to this life and relations... It is all Maya..

Sangat ji I need your feedback on this. Please let me know what Should I do in this case. Please let me know if I should fight further with this or surrender to Waheguru's will. Is this really Waheguru's Hukam? It will be hard for me to talk to him if he goes ahead and marry her. How should I react to this entire scenario?

 

 

 

Even though others think your question is a “fake” question, nevertheless, it’s an important and extremely valid question. If your father is going to marry a woman in her thirties or childbearing age, make sure that you and your siblings sit down together and discuss your inheritance from your parents’ side. Make sure that he has already made a Will stipulating who is going to inherit your parental home, his savings in the bank and other important items of considerable value, sentimental or pecuniary. Because if you people haven’t done this yet, you will lose your entire inheritance, once his second wife has 3  - 4 children with him. In fact, this happened to my best friend, when we were all at university and living in the halls! I hope he will come forward and confirm what I am saying. He is on this forum too,  just like many other friends of mine at university.  Be diplomatic as well as shrewd about it all just like the Chinese

After all, your poor mother didn’t work so hard when she was alive, to have everything passed on to his new wife and children; basically a new family!!! Take care of your financial side quickly!

[Guest Waheguru's Kid]

On 10/5/2020 at 3:12 PM, Markgateshead said:

Even though others think your question is a “fake” question, nevertheless, it’s an important and extremely valid question. If your father is going to marry a woman in her thirties or childbearing age, make sure that you and your siblings sit down together and discuss your inheritance from your parents’ side. Make sure that he has already made a Will stipulating who is going to inherit your parental home, his savings in the bank and other important items of considerable value, sentimental or pecuniary. Because if you people haven’t done this yet, you will lose your entire inheritance, once his second wife has 3  - 4 children with him. In fact, this happened to my best friend, when we were all at university and living in the halls! I hope he will come forward and confirm what I am saying. He is on this forum too,  just like many other friends of mine at university.  Be diplomatic as well as shrewd about it all just like the Chinese

After all, your poor mother didn’t work so hard when she was alive, to have everything passed on to his new wife and children; basically a new family!!! Take care of your financial side quickly!

With faith.. We can achieve anything.. and with this faith, may Waheguru bless me enough patience to achieve liberation...

I had faith I will get some helpful replies or someone  will read my topic who can understand me and my situation.

Finally, veer ji you replied with logical points..

To be honest, I heard from our family members and relatives about my father's second marriage plan and I tried so much not to get attached with this situation but it was so hard...

Finally, I decided not to ask him anything such as property, money, inheritance because he made me feel that kids these days just want money and comfort.. I don't need that..

I have enough to fulfill my basic needs..with Waheguru ji's kirpa...

I really want the best for him but knowing his choices.. it is not a good decision.. I can tell.. can feel it..

The only part that hurts and make me sad is that yes my mother worked so hard all these years to buy that house with him.. She supported him financially until her last breath and left so much behind for him..

I don't want to judge him but he never appreciated my mother when she was there and now he is a completely different person with this lady...

There are comments above that I should live with him but maybe I am unable to do so... There are reasons behind it.. He doesn't want to see me or talk to me when I don't agree with him.. He thinks I am not happy with his happiness but he can't see the clear picture..

Still.. I am trying but let's see..

About the property, will and my share.. I don't know veer ji If I should ask now.. I do not expect much from him at this point...

[Guest Waheguru's Kid]

On 9/25/2020 at 11:45 PM, Guest Fakester said:

So many loop holes, the trolls tripped himself up.

We all live in some kind of illusion.. and here is yours.. There are many things happening in the world which are hard to believe …still thanks a lot for your reply..