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Guest _Singhnee_
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PARENTS ! Darlin I kno some1 hu's bin in2 a similar situation wher parents come under frst priority (even wen it comes to marriage). She chose and got married 2 her parents UGLY decision over someone she liked for years. Make this an example shud I say

and funny enough nor is she happy and Nor R her parents happy, because soon enough her parents found out thatshe only married the guy to make them happy. After hearing this her parents felt so bad and guilty. Now to avoid this you need to tell your parents or get a thija person 2 (Vichola..hehe) 2 fix things up.

Basikly you need to ask this person (you chat 2) that is he willing to get married to you? Is he serious bout all this.

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yea above guest's reply is right also about to make sure if the uk boy is ready to marry you. also make sure his parents will say yes. if not again another issue.

and for the case above guest described is the case that the girl did not say anything and parents did not know i guess that she wanted to marry someone she liked. but see, its not always parents will allow you to marry someone you liked. you need to tell them he is perfect. and that there will not be any problem . (which if there is they are not responsible). if they force you to marry someone u dont want to then who knows what will happen later on ?? and they are also the ones to suffer ......so tell them all this.......(BUT I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST IN YOUR LIFE DIDI).

and for vichola....i think you are the one who know if it is necessary. cause if you are already very close to your mum then i dont think this is useful. this will make your mum feel you have done something wrong and make the case (haha) worse.

after all i think you should do everything step by step .which means the first step is NOT TO REJECT THE PUNJAB BOY , but to ask your UK boy if he is serious with you , if he will marry u

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Guest _Singhnee_
yea above guest's reply is right also about to make sure if the uk boy is ready to marry you. also make sure his parents will say yes. if not again another issue.

and for the case above guest described is the case that the girl did not say anything and parents did not know i guess that she wanted to marry someone she liked. but see, its not always parents will allow you to marry someone you liked.  you need to tell them he is perfect. and that there will not be any problem . (which if there is they are not responsible). if they force you to marry someone u dont want to then who knows what will happen later on ?? and they are also the ones to suffer ......so tell them all this.......(BUT I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST IN YOUR LIFE DIDI).

and for vichola....i think you are the one who know if it is necessary. cause if you are already very close to your mum then i dont think this is useful. this will make your mum feel you have done something wrong and make the case (haha) worse.

after all i think you should do everything step by step .which means the first step is NOT TO REJECT THE PUNJAB BOY , but to ask your UK boy if he is serious with you , if he will marry u

116146[/snapback]

Penjee I think he is 100% serious but if I go and tell my parents that yeh I've met a guy and I've chatted to him my parents will freak out. I'd get into so much trouble for chatting to him as my parents did strictly tell me not to chat to boys even making guy mates their against it so I cant really face up to them. Thats the scary part because I know I'll get in trouble firstly to chat to a guy after they told me they don't like me chatting to boys no.gif . Secondly for thinking about getting married to the guy and dissing the one they've chosen. DAMN my life !

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yea above guest's reply is right also about to make sure if the uk boy is ready to marry you. also make sure his parents will say yes. if not again another issue.

and for the case above guest described is the case that the girl did not say anything and parents did not know i guess that she wanted to marry someone she liked. but see, its not always parents will allow you to marry someone you liked.  you need to tell them he is perfect. and that there will not be any problem . (which if there is they are not responsible). if they force you to marry someone u dont want to then who knows what will happen later on ?? and they are also the ones to suffer ......so tell them all this.......(BUT I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST IN YOUR LIFE DIDI).

and for vichola....i think you are the one who know if it is necessary. cause if you are already very close to your mum then i dont think this is useful. this will make your mum feel you have done something wrong and make the case (haha) worse.

after all i think you should do everything step by step .which means the first step is NOT TO REJECT THE PUNJAB BOY , but to ask your UK boy if he is serious with you , if he will marry u

116146[/snapback]

Penjee I think he is 100% serious but if I go and tell my parents that yeh I've met a guy and I've chatted to him my parents will freak out. I'd get into so much trouble for chatting to him as my parents did strictly tell me not to chat to boys even making guy mates their against it so I cant really face up to them. Thats the scary part because I know I'll get in trouble firstly to chat to a guy after they told me they don't like me chatting to boys no.gif . Secondly for thinking about getting married to the guy and dissing the one they've chosen. DAMN my life !

116158[/snapback]

Isnt there a way wher (or sum1) hu can introduce the boy (the one u like) to your parents?

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Penjee I think he is 100% serious but if I go and tell my parents that yeh I've met a guy and I've chatted to him my parents will freak out. I'd get into so much trouble for chatting to him as my parents did strictly tell me not to chat to boys even making guy mates their against it so I cant really face up to them.

116158[/snapback]

Thas the whole PUHVAREH DHEE JHAR rentz not letin u chat 2 n e boyz. I hav da same prob with my rentz. I even got cloked 1nce or twice chtin 2 a guy (work mate) and my rentz were like Haw y u chatin 2 him 4? They didn undastand tha wen ur @ work u haf 2 sociolise with guyz u cnt say SORRY i'M NOT ALOWED 2 CHAT 2 U BECAUSE UR A GUY AND MY PARENTS SAID NO...

How stupid duz that sound..

N e wayz sorry penji bak 2 ur dilema..I think u shud go with ur decision. Like the posts be4 I rekon itz ur life ur getin married not them. So go 4 it. and as Sikh_Kuri penji said get a 3rd person involvd wher they introduce the boy 2 ur rentz!

Wish u all the best :TH: Hope you can get out of the dilema soon

Guru Kirpa !

Hav a blessed day !

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Penji the main question iz are YOU ready to get married?

116165[/snapback]

Paji I dont kno. I've completed my undergrdua8 degree but want to move on2 doing postgradua8 and even Masters and even go on2 PHD if possible (If Vaheguroo Ji doez Kirpa) my parents kno this but they said to me that it's ok to still carry on while married as my bro and pabhi Jee have done so.

Personally I dont want to get married untill I've completed Masters. no.gif

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Penji the main question iz are YOU ready to get married?

116165[/snapback]

Paji I dont kno. I've completed my undergrdua8 degree but want to move on2 doing postgradua8 and even Masters and even go on2 PHD if possible (If Vaheguroo Ji doez Kirpa) my parents kno this but they said to me that it's ok to still carry on while married as my bro and pabhi Jee have done so.

Personally I dont want to get married untill I've completed Masters. no.gif

116166[/snapback]

Penji have you thought of expressing this to your parents?

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Guest _gupt_

If I was in ur position this is what I would do.

I would tell my parents FIRST that I do not liek the indian guy because although he is great as a friend he is not what u r looking for in a husband, I want someone who is well educated and on the same wavelength. But mum and dad if u still insist then I will destroy my life for ur happiness.

Dunno abt u but my parents would call him and tell him to forget me, although I'm assuming it is my passport he was thinking abt more.

SECOND, I would give it a few months and then introduce them to the one I found.

Now I would either go upto them and tell them, look what I found OR

get my brother involved, OR set up a meeting 'purely coincidental' where they meet him and think wow nice guy and then u get married and according to them it was always an arranged thing.

BUT even if this guy u like is interested I would advise u to be 100% sure that u 2 are happy to get married, is the guy definitely as committed as u think he is because if he turns out to be slightly wrong then u really have had it hunna.

But, really dont get marreid to someone u dont like, because marriage is a big thing, not something u do to keep mum or dad or naniji happy, if u think ur cant be happy with the guy then say no no matter what even if u think it will get u into a fight just say it but stay calm and talk abt it as maturely as possible and im sure ur parents will understand if it is ur happiness that is the first and last thing that matters to them.

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