Gurdwara Issues

[Guest punjabi_kaur]

I need some help I am unable to speak to anyone about this as its a hard issues I need some help on what I can do. I use to attend a Gurdwara in London as I was a student at a Uni nearby some one from the Gurdwara Committee asked me to help do some seva which I decided would be a good thing to do, I started for a few months and everything was going well but then this Member grab me while I was they one evening. He pushed me on the floor and tried to get hes way. I got away problem is as he is part of the Committee and a well respected member of the gurdwara no one listened to me. I did go to the Gurdwara after but saw him again and when I saw him looking at me I could not attend I have not been to the gurdwara after this day how can I get this problem sort this person is still part of the Committee. Please help me

[JasdeepKaur]

I need some help I am unable to speak to anyone about this as its a hard issues I need some help on what I can do. I use to attend a Gurdwara in London as I was a student at a Uni nearby some one from the Gurdwara Committee asked me to help do some seva which I decided would be a good thing to do, I started for a few months and everything was going well but then this Member grab me while I was they one evening. He pushed me on the floor and tried to get hes way. I got away problem is as he is part of the Committee and a well respected member of the gurdwara no one listened to me. I did go to the Gurdwara after but saw him again and when I saw him looking at me I could not attend I have not been to the gurdwara after this day how can I get this problem sort this person is still part of the Committee. Please help me

i think i am aware of who it is, if i am correct it is at the shepherds bush gurdwara. i have seen and approached him a few times but feel intimidated as he has used his 'power' as a committee member against me. i hope he can be stopped.

[Guest shocked]

?????????????????????????????? im shocked

to both penjis, plz dont sit back and let it continue. what do you mean uses his power? like boss you around?

and if this guy has pushed you to the ground? i dont think we can sit back, this is serious. I know it may have been difficult for you to call the police, but that is the right thing to do.

This behaviour is not tolerated in sikhi or in any country. doesnt matter if he is a commitee member or not. he needs to be dealt with.

something needs to be done, the Gurdwara should be a safe place.

is it possible for more info , so we can identify this man. if two bibiya have had problems, we dont know how many more victims there are.

if you need to talk to someone in confidence or email someone, use the sikh help line.com

this is terrible news, dont feel like no one will support you, no one wants these dodgy ppl in the gurdwaras

[Only five]

Don't hide this man's name expose him and talk to some Singhs that know how to take care of this.

Don't suppress this stuff inside.

[.- Prabhjot Singh -.]

Yeah, i agree with the above posters. Even though he might be influential, you still must report this dusht to the police. You really should consider yourself lucky it didnt go too far in your case, others might not be so lucky, and in case something bad like that happens in teh future, you will not be able to sleep with the guilt. What is alarming about this guy is it is not only you who has faced this prob, jasdeepkaur phenji has noticed/felt it too. Please dont brush it under the carpet, who know what evils he has been committing? Its so sad that dodgy stuff like this happens in Gurughars, I have been disillusioned in the past too.

I know it is going to be hard for you phenji but you really should talk to your parents about this. Or at least, talk to some elders about this. Get some support (which im pretty sure you will) and REPORT this worm. May he eternally rot in hell for this!

[Barfi n Mithai]

I'm in London, I go to uni here and if you want to talk PM me. I also happen to live very close to Shepherds Bush Gurdwara. Thankfully I couldn't be bothered to do Seva in the Gurdwara so have no idea about anything and who is on the commitee.

Here is a stepwise of what you should do

1. Call the police and get it logged as assault. This doesn't mean he will be found as guilty but they have a duty to question him. If possible give his home address so his wife will find out when when the police knocks on his door. If you give the gurdwara address, he might not be there and the rest of commitee will stick up for him and say something like your making it up and the police will believe them. So definately give his home address where he gets slated in front of his wife and kids.

2. Call a lawyer and say you want compensation for emotional distress

3. Go to your doctors for emotional stress treatment

4. Your unlikely to win as no witness and no evidence. Is there any way you can get evidence....If all the people who have had it happen too then its likely police will do something....so maybe you all can contact each other

5. Also write a letter to your MP about the guy being on the gurdwara commitee and yuo are concerned and shouldn't be allowed as risk to young children

There are other things you can do (PM me so we can talk about the case abit more as I will need to ask you a few more questions about circumstances, relationship, age etc)

[Guest singhni]

This is a know thing its *mod edit: not allowed* hes got issues he as done this in the past why I dont attend anymore people just need to start calling the gurdwara up and removing him from hes seat name and shame is the only way.

[Guest J]

So y don't u expose this persons name

so we know who to look out for. Think about u

wouldn't want ur family hanging around someone

like that so please state who they are instead of

gossiping

[.- Prabhjot Singh -.]

To the original poster:

Phenji it would be better if you register an account with sikhsangat.com so that other members can pm you and discuss this issue with you in private. Thanks..

[Guest Guest]

Okay i you don't tell someone now he's gonna do it again. I have been thinking of going to do seva in a gurdwarra in london and that idea has gone down the drain.

If you don't tell someone you are not sikh, be a strong sikh and fight for justice!! our gurus are not proud of you right now that is certain.

If you don't want to press charges, which you should as it is sexual assault and he will do it again to some other young sikh girl or woman (he could be a peodophile aswell), then DEFINITELY let some singhs on here know who he is so they can jump him and scare him into never doing this again, it is not as much as he deserves but it's something.