Patka Help

[nooby]

HI! I hope someone can help me and my son.

I shall gloss over the huge row I've had with the education board who insisted I send my son to a school that does not accept boys with long hair rather than send him to the one just a little further away that would accept him. I shall gloss over the Education Welfare Officer's rather offensive comments about faith....

Ahem.

Anyway, we have finally got the school to agree that my son can keep his hair, if he ties it up the same as the Sikh boys. They even arranged for us to meet one of their Sikh boys so he could show us how he ties his hair in a patka. Bless him, he even gave us one of his old patkas, that is partially sewn so you can just drop it over the topknot of hair. Sadly it's too small, especially given the thickness of my son's hair. You could lose a pack of wild dogs in there.... I've ordered some patkas, but they aren't the same - squares of material with a tie on each corner. I have no idea how to tie this!

If anyone could point me to some instructions and/or a video, I would be most grateful. Plus, does the patka have to cover the entire hair? The school have said they are fine as long as the topknot is covered, but again, no idea how to tie the patka this way!

Thanks in advance.

[SikhStuff.com]

You can learn to tie a patka from this video.

Learn How to tie a Patka

[nooby]

You can learn to tie a patka from this video.

Learn How to tie a Patka

Thanks.

It may take a while to get the hang of. If I can even get my son's hair to coil that tightly - it's way too thick. Luckily there's six weeks to practice in :D

[SikhStuff.com]

Thanks.

It may take a while to get the hang of. If I can even get my son's hair to coil that tightly - it's way too thick. Luckily there's six weeks to practice in :D

Best of Luck, it just needs practice, to tie a neat Patka.

[nooby]

I'm going to need a lot of luck! I can tie it on, it looks neat, but when he moves too much it falls off! Any idea what I'm doing wrong?

[Singhstah]

I think you need a very big patka by the sounds of it, and unlike in the video, the patka should be much lower on the forehead, like just 1 and a 1/2 finger tips above the eyebrows. Also, instead of using a string into the hair, what you can do is just coil it up normally and make a topknot and then put a rubber band on top of the knot to keep it firm, alot of the times it is the joora that needs to be firm. Also, I remember the way my mum used to do it when I was little was different, after you have tied the first knot and you have two parts hanging underneath, take one diagonally across the back of your son's head, and bring the string round the front of the joora, then the other hanging part in the other diagonal direction, both strings should meet at the front of the top knot then tie them around the topknot. Hope that makes sense.

So I take it your not sikh? Thats very interesting you keep your son's hair, could you share why? We'd all be interested considering what hair enthusiasts we all are lol.

[nooby]

Ohh, thanks, I'll try that. It just keeps slipping....it probably doesn't help he's a very active lad.

As for why he keeps his hair...it's kind of complicated. Me and my husband are Pagans (not the same sort of Pagan, naturally lol) and part of our beliefs are that, as far as is possible and practical, what happens to our body is up to us and not for society to dictate. Same goes for our children. My branch of Paganism very much trends towards leaving hair/beards natural, (although it's not insisted on) and my son believes this too. He hasn't had his hair cut since he was old enough to say 'I don't want my hair cut' when he was two - and he didn't have it cut before then either. It's, um, part of who he is, if you see what I mean? Also part of are beliefs are to be true to who you are, rather than conform to what other people think you should be. (well, within reason! There are proscribed limits, but they are pretty broad. No adultery, no murdering, no oathbreaking. If you hurt someone else, emotionally or physically, you have to make reparations to them or their family, and those reparations could be anything, from money to serving the family for a set time, or whatever)

At his primary school they had no problem with it - it was always neatly tied back in a plait or ponytail and never got in the way. However, the secondary school's objection to his hair is 'it's not socially acceptable for a boy to have long hair'. Which, apart from being ridiculous, isn't enough of a reason for us to make him cut his hair. It's not as if long hair affects his academic ability! As a compromise, we said we'd tie it any way they liked so it would be out of the way and practical, and luckily they agreed and said we could tie it the same as their Sikh pupils. Hence my tussle with the patka :D

[MPKaur]

Hi,

It is interesting how your son is keeping his hair and the reasons why, thank you for sharing. I hope tying the patka is getting easier

For my sons, I usually tied their hair with a rubber band first (like a pony tail on the top of the head) and then i bread it, and then i tie it up. I then add another rubber band to keep it in place. It's so solid it can last for days!

Although i wouldn't recommend it, because there is always small hair falling and then they end up tangling themselves

Once the hair is solid then the patka should stay on.

Let us know your progress /challenges.