Praise And Ego

[Gurooo]

How can you appreciate praise and good comments given by others, without getting egoistical?

[TuhiNirankar]

ਹਮ ਮੂਰਖ ਮੂਰਖ ਮਨ ਮਾਹਿ ॥

हम मूरख मूरख मन माहि ॥

Ham mūrakẖ mūrakẖ man māhi.

We are ignorant; ignorance fills our minds.

ਹਉਮੈ ਵਿਚਿ ਸਭ ਕਾਰ ਕਮਾਹਿ ॥

हउमै विचि सभ कार कमाहि ॥

Ha▫umai vicẖ sabẖ kār kamāhi.

We do all our deeds in ego.

ਗੁਰ ਪਰਸਾਦੀ ਹੰਉਮੈ ਜਾਇ ॥

गुर परसादी हंउमै जाइ ॥

Gur parsādī haʼn▫umai jā▫e.

By Guru's Grace, egotism is eradicated.

ਆਪੇ ਬਖਸੇ ਲਏ ਮਿਲਾਇ ॥੨॥

आपे बखसे लए मिलाइ ॥२॥

Āpe bakẖse la▫e milā▫e. ||2||

Forgiving us, the Lord blends us with Himself. ||2||

ਬਿਖਿਆ ਕਾ ਧਨੁ ਬਹੁਤੁ ਅਭਿਮਾਨੁ ॥

बिखिआ का धनु बहुतु अभिमानु ॥

Bikẖi▫ā kā ḏẖan bahuṯ abẖimān.

Poisonous wealth gives rise to great arrogance.

ਅਹੰਕਾਰਿ ਡੂਬੈ ਨ ਪਾਵੈ ਮਾਨੁ ॥

अहंकारि डूबै न पावै मानु ॥

Ahaʼnkār dūbai na pāvai mān.

Drowning in egotism, no one is honored.

ਆਪੁ ਛੋਡਿ ਸਦਾ ਸੁਖੁ ਹੋਈ ॥

आपु छोडि सदा सुखु होई ॥

Āp cẖẖod saḏā sukẖ ho▫ī.

Forsaking self-conceit, one finds lasting peace.

ਗੁਰਮਤਿ ਸਾਲਾਹੀ ਸਚੁ ਸੋਈ ॥੩॥

गुरमति सालाही सचु सोई ॥३॥

Gurmaṯ sālāhī sacẖ so▫ī. ||3||

Under Guru's Instruction, he praises the True Lord. ||3||

ਦਾਸਨਿ ਦਾਸ ਨਿਤ ਹੋਵਹਿ ਦਾਸੁ ॥

दासनि दास नित होवहि दासु ॥

Ḏāsan ḏās niṯ hovėh ḏās.

They become the constant slaves of the slaves of the Lord's slaves.

ਗ੍ਰਿਹ ਕੁਟੰਬ ਮਹਿ ਸਦਾ ਉਦਾਸੁ ॥੨॥

ग्रिह कुट्मब महि सदा उदासु ॥२॥

Garih kutamb mėh saḏā uḏās. ||2||

Within their households and families, they remain always detached. ||2||

Whenevr u do seva kirtan anything, just do it with the right intention dont do it for praise,

If sumone praises u, ur mind should fall to mahraj dey charan,

ਤੁਧੁ ਆਗੈ ਅਰਦਾਸਿ ਹਮਾਰੀ ਜੀਉ ਪਿੰਡੁ ਸਭੁ ਤੇਰਾ ॥

तुधु आगै अरदासि हमारी जीउ पिंडु सभु तेरा ॥

Ŧuḏẖ āgai arḏās hamārī jī▫o pind sabẖ ṯerā.

I offer my prayer to You; my body and soul are all Yours.

ਕਹੁ ਨਾਨਕ ਸਭ ਤੇਰੀ ਵਡਿਆਈ ਕੋਈ ਨਾਉ ਨ ਜਾਣੈ ਮੇਰਾ ॥੪॥੧੦॥੪੯॥

कहु नानक सभ तेरी वडिआई कोई नाउ न जाणै मेरा ॥४॥१०॥४९॥

Kaho Nānak sabẖ ṯerī vadi▫ā▫ī ko▫ī nā▫o na jāṇai merā. ||4||10||49||

Says Nanak, this is all Your greatness; no one even knows my name. ||4||10||49||

ਲੋਕਨ ਕੀਆ ਵਡਿਆਈਆ ਬੈਸੰਤਰਿ ਪਾਗਉ ॥

लोकन कीआ वडिआईआ बैसंतरि पागउ ॥

Lokan kī▫ā vaḏi▫ā▫ī▫ā baisanṯar pāga▫o.

The glories of the world, I cast into the fire.

ਜਿਉ ਮਿਲੈ ਪਿਆਰਾ ਆਪਨਾ ਤੇ ਬੋਲ ਕਰਾਗਉ ॥੧॥

जिउ मिलै पिआरा आपना ते बोल करागउ ॥१॥

Ji▫o milai pi▫ārā āpnā ṯe bol karāga▫o. ||1||

I chant those words, by which I may meet my Beloved. ||1||

Wow just look at the mindsets of the beautfiul saadh jan, They dont care if the world praises them or not, koee bhala kahoo bhave bura kahoo

all that matters is our relationship with our Guru,

ਤਉ ਨਾਨਕ ਕੰਤੈ ਮਨਿ ਭਾਵੈ ॥

तउ नानक कंतै मनि भावै ॥

Ŧa▫o Nānak kanṯai man bẖāvai.

Then, O Nanak, the bride becomes pleasing to the Mind of her Husband Lord;

ਛੋਡਿ ਵਡਾਈ ਅਪਣੇ ਖਸਮ ਸਮਾਵੈ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥੨੬॥

छोडि वडाई अपणे खसम समावै ॥१॥ रहाउ ॥२६॥

Cẖẖod vadā▫ī apṇe kẖasam samāvai. ||1|| rahā▫o. ||26||

she sheds her self-conceit, and is absorbed in her Lord and Master. ||1||Pause||26||

The Late Bhai Parminder Singh ji Bc valey kathavachak, they said sumthing along the lines of " Everyone thinks about how to make the world happy, but no one thinks in the way of What Makes Guru Sahib happy?

Why do we care about what ppl say,\

At the end worldy praise or dhan or respect doesnt matter

Only Bani is going to go with us, the rest is just part of the illusion, things that side-track us,

[Guest Balhaaree]

Take the praise as VahegurooJee's kirpa...If anyone is praising you or anything you've done, think it as It is Guroo Saheb's Kirpa. Since we as human beings don't do anything by ourselves, Guroo jee does it "through us" So it is His Kirpa that He did something great through you !! That doesn't make you egotistical in anyway but again makes you think of VahegurooJee & Thank Him. saari vadeyaaee belongs to Him only.

As "Tuhi Nirankar" ji mentioned we shouldn't care or worry about what people says about us. The focus should always be to make GurooJee happy by staying in His Hukam.

Pardon me for any bhul chuk.

[Mehtab Singh]

Many centuries ago there used to be a Muslim Pathaan by the name of Raheem who was surprisingly a devotee of the Hindu god Shri Krishan Ji. I studied Hindi in school and we used to have Raheem's dohay (couplets, like small poems) as part of our syllabus. There was one that wasn't taught in school but I heard it in a bhajans audio cassette. Raheem would always have his face downwards, and people would praise him so much because of his bhagti. One day someone asked him why are your eyes always down?

He replied

Daynhaar Kou Aur Hai, Dayt Rehet Din Rayn

The Giver is someone else, who gives day and night

Log Bharam Hum Par Karein, Thaaso Neechey Nain

But people are proud of me, and so I always have my eyes down

[JPS]

You even be wanting praises in the first place.

IN GurBaani it says:

Mere Laaln Ki Shobaa ll (Bavan Akhri)

Praise is and should only be for Guru Sahib. You wanting wordly praise is going to increase ego. There is no way out there ego wont hit.

(Below is taken from Gurmatbibek's forum. http://gurmatbibek.c...orum/read.php?3,3147,3180#msg-3180)

[quote]

When Bhai Sahib refused to attend Akhand Kirtan Samagam

Bhai Sahib Randhir Singh jee was an embodiment of humility and Sikhi. Even after reaching such high state as Brahmgyaan, he did not let anyone give him status higher than a humble Sikh. Bhai Sahib always stayed "Bhai" and did not even let anyone call him a Sant or matha-tek to him. If someone did call Bhai Sahib with names like Brahmgyani or Sant, he used to get very upset.

Once Bhai Sahib went for Darshan of Siri Harmandir Sahib. He was walking in the Prakarma when a Bibi sensing Bhai Sahib's high avastha, tried to matha-tek (prostrate) to him. Bhai Sahib called out to his companion and said, "Hand me my cane. This old Bibi (maayee) cannot see the Charan Kamal of Siri Guru Raamdaas jee and is coming towards my feet." The Bibi got scared and ran away saying, "This Sant beats too." (Ih Sant taa maarda vee hai).

There is another incident that has come to mind. This Saakhi is not very common and was narrated by Gurmukh of Bhai Sahib's times. Once the Sangat of Jaipur invited the whole Jatha to do a Samagam at their city Jaipur. Bhai Sahib too was invited and Bhai Sahib agreed to go as well. All Gursikhs like Bhai Sahib, Bau Mal Singh and many others got ready and arrived at Jaipur.

The Sangat of Jaipur in the meantime had published and distributed posters of Bhai Sahib in which they praised Bhai Sahib with adjectives like "Sant", "Brahmgyani". When Bhai Sahib arrived at Jaipur, he found out about these posters and such praising of his personality. Bhai Sahib wanted to set the record straight and stop such practice in the future. Furthermore, Bhai Sahib did not believe that he was worthy of praise when only Guru Sahib should be accorded praise of this level. Bhai Sahib decided to not attend the Samagam. Bhai Sahib decided to stay at the place of a Gurmukh in Jaipur and not attend the Samagam.

Many Gursikhs requested Bhai Sahib to come and Bhai Sahib with tears in his eyes said that with what face will he face the Sangat and Guru Sahib. He said that he had been unduly praised when he did not deserve any praise at all. In the end, Bau Mal Singh jee, whom Bhai Sahib never used to refuse came but Bhai Sahib still did not agree to come.

Now Bau jee said, "Bhai Sahib jee, if you don't accept our request, then we will have to order you to come, in form of Punj Pyare. How will you say no to them?"

Bhai Sahib humbly replied, "Bau jee, you are correct in saying that I can't refuse the order of Punj Pyare but this Daas can leave the body through the Dasam Duaar and go to Sachkhand before the Punj Pyare arrive."

Bhai Sahib could at will leave for Sachkhand through Dasam Duaar. In jail, when he was to be force-fed, he had told the doctor that if his Dharma is broken by force, it is possible that he leave his body for Sachkhand, through Dasam Duaar.

In the end Bhai Sahib did not go to the Samagam and stayed merged in Naam at the house he was staying. It was because of such strict stands that Sangat did not accord Bhai Sahib with adjectives like "Sant", "Shiromini Sant" etc.

The lesson to be learned from this Saakhi is that we should forever stay humble Gursikhs and never try to get a higher status. It is detrimental to our spiritual health, if we don't heed to this advice of Mahapurakhs like Bhai Sahib jee.

Daas,

Kulbir Singh

[Jagdeep Kaur]

The praise and good comments are not to you specifically, they are to God. Are we all not God? Are we all not exactly the same?

Story I know; A beggar on the street did not eat for days. A man feels sorry for him and gives him a piece of bread. The beggar has a dog, and feeds the Dog the piece of bread. The man laughs at the beggar and thinks him a fool. The beggar says, Vishnu is laughing at Vishnu, and Vishnu is feeding Vishnu.

We need to separate the mind which makes us think that we, our physical manifestations are getting praise (=ego) from the reality.