Marriage Problem?

[VanHelsingh]

just wanted to give a little feedback to the sangat here.

Yes I made the right decision by hearing all of you Sangat's advices. I am grateful that I did. It is Guru ji's blessings that I came out of it.

Compatilibilty is very important to me and my family, i told him that and he could think it as a matter of ego or greedy DOesnt matter what he thinks. Its up to guruji to judge me on that.I made it well clear to the guy that I am not for it at all and totally stopped talking to him, cut off all the contacts. Even though he was still insisting that we could still be friends. But I didnt want to keep any contacts with him or be his "friend". That could never work. PLus i learned my lesson - No more chatting online with anyone, they might be veerji or bhaaji or just a friend, at first, could lead to worse things in future. I would also suggest the same to my other brothers and sisters who indulge in chatting online to NOT to make this mistake. :excl:

Anyway I am very thankful to the sangat and Guruji for helping me make the right decision

Well done, sister. This strength of mind and forthright attitude is what all of our sisters need to adopt.

[Guest Iknownothing]

The Phenji thing can be used as a luring technique sickly enough. I'd rather someone call me by my name rather than that if it is being said with false intentions, but who's to comment when we live in such a world. Anyway here's my 2pence

1) you've never met the guy, so any attachment you may have is just over written/spoken words

2)you seem young, you have your whole life ahead of you

3)parents no matter how stuck in their ways/backwards they may seem, they say 'no' and try to get you a love away from situations simply because they love you. This is their way of showing it. Your mataji carried you for 9months before god blessed you and brought you into this world and spend all those years bringing you up, feeding you and lookaftering you. You'll always be their little baby girl.

Safest quickest most stress free option would be to try and immerse yourself around some good sangat, whether thats 1 person (god) or a group of people who would be a help. Stop talking to this guy a few weeks/months/year down the line, you will look back and probably laugh at this situation. thinking to your self, why did you even bother putting so much time/energy into another person when there's no gaurantee about a future together at the same time putting your parents under stress (and trust me even though they may not show it, parents constantly ficker about their little girls, in fear of one day putting them into someone elses family and hoping they'll have stability and happiness)

Anyway you've probably had plenty of advice on here, goodluck.

[MajorAmarjeetSingh]

I hate to say this but I agree.

disagree

cant always blame the veer jee

takes 2 to tango

[VanHelsingh]

disagree

cant always blame the veer jee

takes 2 to tango

Similar to the tango, one person always leads and 9 times out of 10 it's the "veer ji".

[xtremesingh18]

Similar to the tango, one person always leads and 9 times out of 10 it's the "veer ji".

Disagree, 5.7 times out of 10 it is the "veerji", remainder of the time it is the "bhenji"

[MajorAmarjeetSingh]

Similar to the tango, one person always leads and 9 times out of 10 it's the "veer ji".

no.

if the girl doesnt like the tango, she can say no

so many times, people make out that girls are being taken advantage of

in most cases the girl is old enough to make her own decisions

on one hand, people call for equality, and say boys and girls should be treated the same, on the other hand they say that its all the guys fault when it comes to relationships

a girl can say no, and i know plenty of cases where girls have instigated the relationship

time for girls to stand up for themselves

long live the veer jees

[VanHelsingh]

C'mon you playerz! Stop sticking up for your homies. :lol:

[MajorAmarjeetSingh]

C'mon you playerz! Stop sticking up for your homies. :lol:

[sunny_love_kirtan]

100% positive replies from all members and thanks to Guru Maharaj that we have such a sayani sangat here. Never ever get committed to strangers/anyone on online chats. If in any case you find that there is something which could work out, always consult your parents and go into details and even let your parents talk to the other party. Specially in cases of other person's migration because in most cases this is the only reason people try to develop so called friendship.

Personally, I am looking for a match in United States because my parents live there and I came to Canada for studies because at that time I was not able to travel with my mom and a brother who moved to US after my dad who was in US for long time applied for us. Because I was just 4 months over 21 years I wasnt a child anymore and became ineligible to travel. If I would have to ask someone girl regarding all this I would tell straight that this is my NEED and after that this is how we are compatible. Being a Gursikh is the biggest compatibility for another gursikh partner but other important things like education, mutual understanding, hobbies, qualities, nature and sometimes financial status should never be ignored.

[Guest vadbhag]

100% positive replies from all members and thanks to Guru Maharaj that we have such a sayani sangat here. Never ever get committed to strangers/anyone on online chats. If in any case you find that there is something which could work out, always consult your parents and go into details and even let your parents talk to the other party. Specially in cases of other person's migration because in most cases this is the only reason people try to develop so called friendship.

Personally, I am looking for a match in United States because my parents live there and I came to Canada for studies because at that time I was not able to travel with my mom and a brother who moved to US after my dad who was in US for long time applied for us. Because I was just 4 months over 21 years I wasnt a child anymore and became ineligible to travel. If I would have to ask someone girl regarding all this I would tell straight that this is my NEED and after that this is how we are compatible. Being a Gursikh is the biggest compatibility for another gursikh partner but other important things like education, mutual understanding, hobbies, qualities, nature and sometimes financial status should never be ignored.

Yeah great sangat here, great advice. All the best with you too.