Help! I Lost My Baby And My Love. End Of My Nerves.

[Guest guptbhenji]

Wjkk wjkf

at first could not understand this story as was very long. Na koi intermission. Na koi sirh na koi paihr story da .

But now seems from wat i have understood history has opened up. Have you ever talked to a counsellor? There is so much involved in this story emotionally practically mentally.

I am a female bhenji and will not judge you on wat has happened in ur life and cannot as only god has the right to that. You have had the courage to come on this site and unload your emotions which must have been hard.

I see there are not many replies from bhenjis. Everybody is not perfect and mistakes are made by everyone.

My advise to you would be wat is done is done with, now try to get help from god. It will be hard. But Waheguruji is the only one that will help you bhenji.

Everybody comes into this world with different karm, but whilst we are here we can try to make our karm better. Jap waheguruji from your heart and ask for forgiveness for any wrong doing. And good you are thinking of doing seva, more than wat i can achieve. Dont think about harming yourself bhenji. God has given you this life, now you got so much to look forward to and to think about wat you want to do.

Nanak nam chardi kala, tere bhane sarbat da bhala....

[DustOfTheSaintsFeet]

It is one thing judging and another telling the Truth. The correct thing to do if you thought you would need to abort if you had a baby would have been not to have sexual relations in the first place. Aborting is killing full stop, It is murdering a life that God has sent into the world, as long as it is there in the womb no matter how small, it is a life. There are places you could have gone if you had a baby that would be able to help you and give you advice. If you could afford a trip to India you could have gone to a country with womens shelters etc.

I understand you have had pain, but there is no justification for abortion at all, souls spend millions of years trying to gain this precious human life, to take one away once it has reached here is wrong. Noone is strong enough for life, every single person you see and speak to is in pain, it is Kalyug, many religions agree this is darkest age ever known to mankind, but it is like this for a reason, it is in our darkest moments that we turn to and call on God.

[Guest guptbhenji]

WJkk wjkf

Yes truth should be told but it has happened and the past(atheeth) has gone. I think she realises wat she has done. And the bad karms we all have to pay for. The main thing now is how can bhenji do the right good karm now to prevent any further bad karm. Dust of the saints is right in wat he or she says too.

[m4ndy]

It is one thing judging and another telling the Truth. The correct thing to do if you thought you would need to abort if you had a baby would have been not to have sexual relations in the first place. Aborting is killing full stop, It is murdering a life that God has sent into the world, as long as it is there in the womb no matter how small, it is a life. There are places you could have gone if you had a baby that would be able to help you and give you advice. If you could afford a trip to India you could have gone to a country with womens shelters etc.

I understand you have had pain, but there is no justification for abortion at all, souls spend millions of years trying to gain this precious human life, to take one away once it has reached here is wrong. Noone is strong enough for life, every single person you see and speak to is in pain, it is Kalyug, many religions agree this is darkest age ever known to mankind, but it is like this for a reason, it is in our darkest moments that we turn to and call on God.

Actions have consequences, if she is old enough to have sex and produce a baby then she is old enough to suffer the consequences as obviously she was fully aware before commiting this sin. There are people out there who can't even have children, and this girl decides to abort because she can't live with the shame of telling her family, I'm not being crul it's reality she deserves to have the suffering and now she shall live with it. The guy she has been with is just as bad if not worse..

No more comments to add.

[Guest guptbhenji]

WJkk Wjkf

Mandy bhenji says truth. Ppl out there who can't have children or yearn to have them, i being one of them. I am paying for my karm so will you along with everybody else. If the guy had any sense he would not have left you. I think that's wat caused you to do it. But thaali dho hathan nal vajdi ik nal nai. Shame the other hand waved goodbye. And you would be stupid to go back to that guy again.

You should see a professional about this. Ask your doc, i say this because of ur history. And the state your mind is in now and was then.

[Guest SimranKaur5]

rally lovely from all of you that you really think about my problem and try to help and discuss about it.

and yes. i was at lot psychologist here. but they dont understand me. they have anyway european attittude. they think i am totally mad. they rise eyebrow if i tell them what a problem it is for me. that i cant talk about it to parents, because what a shame. and if i tell that i am used now, because my husband dont want me anymore they laugh about me. but not because that what you think about me. they laugh, because they think it is mad to have only one partner in life and make such drama if not possible. 2 doctors told me, other mother also have nice son. and nowaays its expensive and difficult to have kids, as you will not be easy to go out alone. kids are just a pain in the neck, they told me. so why you upset about not having kids ever? ...and so on.

i really was shocked and disappointed. but since i heard same attitude by two doctors i gave up to talk to any doctor and psychologist about my problem here. european people hate kids. thats why i am different here. thats why i never felt home here. and thats why people dont like me, cos i have different attitude. they say i live in middle ages with my attitude.

really i just hoped he would change mind only to go on with me, then everything would not be a problem.

now i have to learn to live rest of life without kids and husband.

so best is what you DustOfTheSaintsFeet done and suggested me.

i have panic only now, because i dont know how to start. i dont know anybody. so i feel it is difficult usually i am such a person i need a kick for everything, before i move myself. i dont know where to start neither i have any idea what to start and to do. i will go to that country, will have no room, english not so well, no job at first.

i think first i have to find room. then language course and job. then try to make nursing course. cos i wanna learn something to give healthcare. its just i actually feel really psycho, again and again start cry. i dont know how to stop. everytime again it comes in my mind, what everything i planned with him. living with him and his parents. and what we planned for our future.

when i leave my father home daily in the morning, even in bus cry, at work people talk and make jokes i cant laugh, i feel like screaming, my heart beating so fast, i think i really have to controll not to scream around like insane.

so now i still feel and wonder how will i manage it? really i wish to go to gurdwara, everyday. but i also dont know how to behave there. i am always afraid i do things wrong or not deserve to go to gurdwara.

[Guest SimranKaur5]

It is one thing judging and another telling the Truth. The correct thing to do if you thought you would need to abort if you had a baby would have been not to have sexual relations in the first place. Aborting is killing full stop, It is murdering a life that God has sent into the world, as long as it is there in the womb no matter how small, it is a life. There are places you could have gone if you had a baby that would be able to help you and give you advice. If you could afford a trip to India you could have gone to a country with womens shelters etc.

I understand you have had pain, but there is no justification for abortion at all, souls spend millions of years trying to gain this precious human life, to take one away once it has reached here is wrong. Noone is strong enough for life, every single person you see and speak to is in pain, it is Kalyug, many religions agree this is darkest age ever known to mankind, but it is like this for a reason, it is in our darkest moments that we turn to and call on God.

Once when i was with him and everything was fine, he told me we should abort. i agreed with him. because i would never disagree. if he said not abort then i would be more happy of course.

then 9 weeks ago when i came back i felt sometimes if i might be pregnant. i had a feeling. but i didnt go to doctor to check. i was afraid. and also i wanted to wait what will happen. because thats time he also told me already cant go on.

so i thought i want to have the baby in case i am pregnant. i wanted to have it. i felt so sad by thinking to abort. but i thought i would make a sin if i do not abort. If i hide that baby from him, that would be very very bad. but if i would told him i will born the baby, i think he would get mad. i dont know, but i think that would be most bad thing to him. i didnt want it. i am sure, if i would born the baby i would destroy my loves life. because he dont want me. but kid there. or maybe he would take that baby one day and bring it to india. who knows. then i born it and really felt close and connect to baby but lost it by that way. but that i didnt think. my thought only was. get the baby and hide?? or tell him my pregnant. but once i tell him, anyway he made me abort. that evening before i went to doctor and she told me i am pregnant, i told him, that i have strange stomache pain. he already started and told me if i am pregnant then i have to abort. from that moment i was sure, i cant hide it anymore and lie him then. i should tell him if i am really pregnant. and then he indeed i have to abort. thats why i felt in such bad situation as i didnt feel anything chance to have the baby. if i get, i had to lie him. and i was not able. if i tell, then no way.

[Guest gupt_kaur]

Hi Simran bhenji,

You seem to have gone through a very difficult time and all alone, with nobody around to speak/ support you when you need it so much. It sounds horrendous all that I have read so far, too much torture kind of. A heartfelt prayer before Guru Ji will take care of you today and in the days, time to come. Guru Ji would surely show some way though all this. Have faith in Him and do go to gurudwara whenever you can. That is one place you should feel safe and find all the peace & calm :-)

May all your troubles come to an end, trust Guru Ji alone.

[Guest thunder_jatt]

look if you love him, keep the baby, he can marry you, end of story? no?

[Guest SimranKaur5]

look if you love him, keep the baby, he can marry you, end of story? no?

that would be great.