tbh bro, I don't think the average mona wants reform in Sikhi, a lot of them openly admit that they drink, cut hair etc and are not practicing Sikhs, and they aren't trying to push anything into Sikhi or distort it. But, its the ones that are openly saying that they want to change Sikhi, bring it into the 21st century, introduce lgbt weddings, saying that keeping hair isn't important, changing anand karaj maryada, discarding anything that doesn't fit their vision of what Sikhi should be etc these lot are a problem! and they will keep pushing until they don't get their way!
The average monas that I know they aren't trying to change anything. I don't agree with their lifestyle at all, but at least they aren't pushing for change. Women/monis are a different case though.
But the ones that want to bring Sikhi into the "21st century" change maryada and tradition, pushy feminism, lgbt into Sikhi they are a problem! They call us dinosaurs they do!
I agree with the "Sikh" weddings. I stopped going a long time back, last "Sikh" wedding I went to was probably around 5 years ago. I don't have heart to see the disrespect that takes place. From what I hear things are getting even worse. The last time I was told about Sikh weddings was just before the lock down by three different people. Lady i know went to her cousins wedding and the bride got so drunk at the reception party that her brothers had to carry her and place her in the car when the party was over! My cousin went to a wedding from the other side of the family and she said the sangat was showering the bride with flowers as she walked in, the granthi Singh got angry and told the ladies to pick the flowers up and said it is not gurmat. And the last one, my friend went to a wedding and he said the granthi Singh stopped and made an announcement and told the women to stop talking and to cover their heads properly and wear appropriate clothes to the Gurdwara.
I have a very close relative in another country getting married later this year and I've already told my family I'm not going. I've been sent the pre-wedding photo-shoot and it really wasn't my cup of tea! think i would feel very out of place around them people! and I know for a fact they will do disrespectful things during their anand karaj.
Its worrying the direction things are going.