To the married sangat - qualities of a Good wife?

[Guest gettingmarried]

wjkk wjkf,

to all my brothers and sisters who are married, what keeps ur household going? what do u consider to be the qualities of a good gursikh wife (or husband!)? are their things ur wife does that u really appreciate or really like? how do u solve disagreements (if any)?

penji's can also respond to this topic, what do u think u do that u think ur husband loves/appreciates? or what does ur husband do that u really appreciate?

what keeps u guys close and the relationship bound, i.e. do u do amrit vela together?

wjkk wjkf

[VanHelsingh]

She must be good on the plough. Everything else will fall into place.

[Guest Guest]

it is important to be the best possible sangat for each other...

i think the best gursikh partners are those who encourage their partner to reach new levels in their sikhi and help them on that journey....

i'm not a fan of the typical punjabi daughter in law mentality...couples should share household tasks and help each other out in their home duties...the wife should not be left to do that.

[chatanga]

She must be good on the plough. Everything else will fall into place.

you wont find many girls with plough experience in UK bhaji. lol.

[VanHelsingh]

you wont find many girls with plough experience in UK bhaji. lol.

That's why I've got a return ticket booked for Kazakhstan next week. Jagsamesh!

To the OP: I would say you need to instill confidence in your wife that you are in control of your home and your life. That doesn't mean be an overbearing ogre but just someone who exudes confidence and is calm in their own skin. Your wife will respect you and that is essential in this day and age. Respect both ways.

Also someone who is on your wavelength spiritually. Arguably this aspect is absolutely essential if you're even halfway serious about a true Sikh life. Clearly people aren't the finished article from the outset but the tell-tale signs are usually present in the individual who wishes to travel that route.

[Azaad]

Needs to have a great RPM Ratio... Roti per minute ratio!! Average would be making 3 rotiya per minute

[singher23]

I'm literally dying of laughter

[Guest Guest]

Needs to have a great RPM Ratio... Roti per minute ratio!! Average would be making 3 rotiya per minute

LOL

[Guest Guest]

That's why I've got a return ticket booked for Kazakhstan next week. Jagsamesh!

To the OP: I would say you need to instill confidence in your wife that you are in control of your home and your life. That doesn't mean be an overbearing ogre but just someone who exudes confidence and is calm in their own skin. Your wife will respect you and that is essential in this day and age. Respect both ways.

Also someone who is on your wavelength spiritually. Arguably this aspect is absolutely essential if you're even halfway serious about a true Sikh life. Clearly people aren't the finished article from the outset but the tell-tale signs are usually present in the individual who wishes to travel that route.

Veerjee, love your thoughts, but what if say your future partner is not at the same level as your spiritually, but you can tell that they really want to progress in their Sikhi? For example, say you have a pakka amrit vela, and your partner-to-be doesn't, but they want to improve this. Or say your partner doesn't have as much giyaan as you do, would you still consider this a good rishta?

I've just recieved a rishta from a Singh who is on another level of spirituality than me. By that I mean that he is a much better Sikh than I am, and he takes his Sikhi very seriously. I do too, but his knowledge is intimidating! He makes me want to be a much better Sikh and inspires me to go a step further each time, but I feel like it will only be him giving and giving and helping me move forwards whereas I can't do much for him? Is it best to marry someone on the same level, or is it ok to marry someone who has a lot of pyaar for Sikhi but just needs that extra support?

WJKK WJKF,

A confused sister

[VanHelsingh]

Veerjee, love your thoughts, but what if say your future partner is not at the same level as your spiritually, but you can tell that they really want to progress in their Sikhi? For example, say you have a pakka amrit vela, and your partner-to-be doesn't, but they want to improve this. Or say your partner doesn't have as much giyaan as you do, would you still consider this a good rishta?

I've just recieved a rishta from a Singh who is on another level of spirituality than me. By that I mean that he is a much better Sikh than I am, and he takes his Sikhi very seriously. I do too, but his knowledge is intimidating! He makes me want to be a much better Sikh and inspires me to go a step further each time, but I feel like it will only be him giving and giving and helping me move forwards whereas I can't do much for him? Is it best to marry someone on the same level, or is it ok to marry someone who has a lot of pyaar for Sikhi but just needs that extra support?

WJKK WJKF,

A confused sister

You are very, very lucky, sister! Honestly this isn't even a dilemma. From a jeevan perspective, without wishing to sound trite, you've got to step up! Prove to yourself, your potential partner, and most importantly Guru Sahib that you are worth the effort.

That's my opinion. If anyone else has anything to add I'm sure they will. In conclusion don't talk yourself down. If you truly desire to learn and improve then it will happen.