Really Low Point

[Guest Really low point]

Vaheguru jee ka khalsa vaheguru ji ki fateh

sadh sangat jee please read this with a kind heart, I really need some help.

I am truly in love with Guru Sahib, I feel like I could literally do path all day, however I have quite an issue. I picked a job which I thought would give me time for independent bhagti, however I was sorely mistaken. Due to certain issues I am now working around 12 hours a day if not more (i have to take home work as well), its not even a choice, its simply if I don't get the work done then EVERYTHING would come to a standstill. I am trying everything I can to minimise the work.

Now my problem is that my sikhi has fallen to a deep low. I was hoping to do load of path this weekend but i was so exhausted from the week that i literally just collapsed and have done NOTHING all weekend. In fact, due to doing less path and simran in the week I find that I have fallen a lot more badly into vikaars and my mind is getting dirtier. It feels like a true case of "sikh gur bin mar jaee". I can't explain but I feel like i am losing my sikhi and this literally makes me feel like i am dying inside. I just want to cry. There was a point where I would stay up all night doing bhagti now i can't even do amritvela. It would be better if I was dead.

[Mehtab Singh]

Singh jee, if that is really your avastha then I guess this forum could learn a lot from you. Not sure why you would ask such a question that too over here as we're (ok fine, atleast I am) light years behind you.

[MokhamSingh]

Khalsa Ji,

Under the present circumstances, you should go for quality, rather than quantity, i.e do one Japji Sahib, with full devotion, rather than numerous repitions, with a distracted mind.

One fully concentrated Paath, gives immense power. 6th Patshahi almost gave their Gurta Gadhi, to a Sikh who recited Japji Sahib, with devotion...

Waheguru.....

[singhbj singh]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

Singh Sahib it all comes down to an individual's Avastha & Bharosa.

Many will relate to the following Shabad

http://searchgurbani.com/scriptures/ggs_shabad/4480/line/8

Some to

http://searchgurbani.com/scriptures/ggs_shabad/44/line/7

Very few to

http://searchgurbani.com/scriptures/ggs_shabad/1538/line/12

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

[skaur8888]

Hello ji

It sounds like maybe you need more balance in your life, is there any way of cutting the hours at work? if not is it realistic to think of changing jobs, I know its easier said than done but I regret now the amount of time I spent in the past working or studying - its important to take care of your responsibilities but also to have time for connecting with Viaguruji. Maybe changing the work will be more of longterm solution, for now like MokkamSingh ji suggested focus on doing Japji Sahib with devotion. I used to really struggle with doing naam simran, someone suggested just to do 5 mins and I wasn't sure how doing 5 mins could make any difference, but it has - and now I do it everyday for 20 minutes. So maybe finding short periods where you can fit in doing paat, listening to kirtan (while travelling to work?) - don't think you should feel guilty for not being able to do as much as you feel you should - try and do what you can but with love and devotion.

Hope that helps, with Vaiguruji's blessing

[skaur8888]

perhaps your boss is taking advantage too, are there not other people who can help with the work - in my experience if you're good at your job people tend to give you more of the work as they know you can be relied on, maybe you're very conscientious too - its not meant as a critiscm as its a very good quality but people can sometimes take advantage especially if you're the type that doesn't like to let people down. I should know as I'm one of those too - but its important to take care of yourself too.

[Mrkhalsa007]

Do an ardaas to maharaj for power to jap naam, also keep this in your mind bharosa (I.e the ardaas will get done) also like mokham singh ji and skaur have said do so, if you can't read bani for long read a short one for example chaupai sahib or svaiye (sravag sudh waley) also jap gurmantar slowly in your mind, just for a second close ur eyes and jap Va-He-Gu-Ru slowly all 4 words Va He Gu Ru slowly so your mind can slow down and then keep ardaasaan up and try to get another job if possible I knw its hard but a true ardas from the heart can change the impossible to possible ji