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Sikh Girls, Virginity And Sex Before Marriage.


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WJKK WJKF



I am a Sikh guy from Delhi. I want to ask a question about Sikh girls, virginity and sex before marriage. But first, I want to tell you about what has driven me to come here and ask this question.



I used to like a girl in the final year of my school. She used to like me too. We used to blush a lot while talking to each other and We used to talk to each other a lot. We told each other about our feelings and felt good about it. Later we went to different colleges. One day there was a cultural event in her college, I came to know of it from my friends in that college, and thought I should surprise her. I went there with my friends and saw her with some other guy, dancing, laughing and having her fun. I felt awkard and bad seeing that but I tried to ignore having seen what I had seen. When I asked my friends about that guy, they said he was her guy, and they had seen them making out quite a few times. I couldnt believe it. She used to say she liked me, loved me, wanted to be with me. I was heart broken. I spoke to her about it and she confessed to it. I stopped talking to her. That teenage love ended then and there. I was depressed for a very long period of time.



After 1.5 years I came across a girl through a mutual friend. She was amritdhari, looked kinda cute and had approached me herself. I started to like her company. She was studying at a college in Gurgaon. After some time of our friendship we both felt attracted towards each other. But she had bad company, had ONLY guy friends, used to go with em to hookah bars, pubs and all other kinda wrong places. I myself am an amritdhari and i personally do not like going to any such places as I feel that Sikhs must not go to these kinda places. (Kutha, hukkah, charas, tambaku, ganja , topi, taadi, khaaku.. inki ore na kabahuu dekhai rehetvand so sikh bisekhai) ... also came to know about her alleged physical relationships with many of her friends. So, we broke up. And I was shaken up again.



After another year of staying depressed and aloof, I came across one extremely amazing girl. She looked very decent and adorable and belonged to an amrirdhari family. Her mom ties dastar, her dad is a great man and knows a lot about gurbani and sends amazing vibes whenever you look at him. But she has had a past too and has been with 2 guys, both of them were hindus and "bihari" and i came to know from a friend who was there in her college that she has done "it" many a times with her guys and there were several pics of her floating around.



Now, By the Guru's grace, I am a Six feet tall, somewhat buffy, fair, pochviin pagg tying, amritdhari Sikh guy and I get plenty of compliments and attention from the opposite sex. I have completed 5 years of my college life at two of the most happening colleges in delhi and have had plenty of chances myself to be 'up, close and personal' with the most adored girls in my colleges. But I have made sure to not to commit any of the four 'kurehits' all these years. I consider any kind of physical intimacy as something sacred which must occur between two people who are life partners and not a mere source of pleasure which can be done with anybody. Thus, I am still a virgin. Yes, 24, male and still a virgin. And yes, I will get married sooner or later. As anybody would, I too want a Sikh girl of good morals and a high character to be my life partner, Someone who knows Sikhi values to the core, hasnt fooled around with guys and of course has her virginity intact. But seeing the current state of Sikh girls (encountering those 3 in my life, seeing Sikh girls in my college and hearing about them from my friends), Seeing all this, I have developed a negative image for girls in my mind and i do not even feel comfortable talking to them. I dont think there are many left who still stay virgin till they get married. Sometimes when sad and depressed, I feel like I should get even and feel like falling for the advances of girls around me. But when I get back to my senses I feel bad for even thinking that ways and I do not want to defy my Guru. I want a decent girl to be my life partner, bit it now seems a rare possibility. I am utterly disappointed and worried. Please help me out. I would like people who are married or in relationships and especially bibiyaan, matawan, bhainaa to please understand my problem and help me come out of it.



WJKK WJKF

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I guess it boils down to you being strong enough to look beyond the past of a girl who has partaken in such things, IF the girl is devoted to you, and you feel she is a good person who may have gone through a phase in the foolishness of youth (amongst other things). If you want somebody untouched then you have no choice but to keep on waiting until that girl comes along. Simple.

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Sadly this is very common amongst Sikh girls and guys. Even amongst those with Sikhi saroop. Don't give in and try to get even. You will only regret it big time. You will find the right girl eventually.

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There is a rare chance a girl will chance her behavoir after she commits the act. Dont get involved with a girl that has a past evev if she is amritdhari. Only do it if your okay with it or she has the character of Mata Sahib Kaur. Majority go bak to there old bad behaviours but hide them with sikhi saroop. It is not worth it a life of celabcy is better.

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I am saddened to hear this. Sometimes us people born and raised in the west just assume that this stuff doesn't happen much India but sometimes I wonder if it happens much more ?

Maybe it does, because over their people seemed to be easily washed up with Bollywood and all the provocative ideas associated with sexuality.

Getting back to your situation-

I think you are looking in the wrong places !!

I remember guys that would always hang out in the places where most dates start up or where most couples meet. And they would be disappointed because all they came across were these bad naughty girls.

It would blind them to such an extent that like you, they would assume that they have all turned this way, they would insist that there are no decent, 'No History' girls about that have virginity and status intact !

Let me tell you the answer---

Yes. there are plenty of these out there but you won't find them hanging around in these usual places.

These girls do their study and go straight home with no messing around.

Your next question will be ,,...........''How do I come across one then ??''

Answer..........You won't that easily. Because if you do that with ease, then they are not that reserved after all, are they ??

Just carry on and focus on your studies. But make friendships as they come your way but don't be looking for that special future wife.

She will just come along and it will happen when you least expect it.

Think of it as mayas play. Maya will fool you and keep deceiving you until you give in.

Just don't give in or give up for that matter.

Let it be and just let it happen with kirpa.

You will be surprised how many of these decent girls think that they will never find that right guy like you !

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What is true Love in the eyes of the great Wehaguru. Take my example. I am married to my wife for the last 20 months. We have been in love for almost 48 months. We have a wall between us. The wall is her mother and her brother-in-law. My wife is so scared of these two losers. She is scared to receive me at the New Delhi Airport. We are having an interview in the next month. Knowing her mother and that she has been a victim of an unwanted child I feel quite understanding of her problems. I for myself being an unwanted to be aborted gone wrong born 2 months before my due date only Guru Jee gave me this life. Therefore I do not wish that our case fails. It unfortunate that I have to lie to her that I am not coming to Delhi. It will be a shock and our true story will be well understood by the visa officer. In the last 20 months even after marriage we have not been able to sleep together but we have sacrificed everything for our love and the time is now with us to be united once and for all. A true love will even sacrifice everything. Where things can look like it is a fraud marriage. All I can pray for is may Wehaguru be strong with us forever. My friend do lots of path and Kirtan perhaps you will fine a very beautiful Singhnee for you self that you both will cherish together.

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WJKK WJKF

I am a Sikh guy from Delhi. I want to ask a question about Sikh girls, virginity and sex before marriage. But first, I want to tell you about what has driven me to come here and ask this question.

I used to like a girl in the final year of my school. She used to like me too. We used to blush a lot while talking to each other and We used to talk to each other a lot. We told each other about our feelings and felt good about it. Later we went to different colleges. One day there was a cultural event in her college, I came to know of it from my friends in that college, and thought I should surprise her. I went there with my friends and saw her with some other guy, dancing, laughing and having her fun. I felt awkard and bad seeing that but I tried to ignore having seen what I had seen. When I asked my friends about that guy, they said he was her guy, and they had seen them making out quite a few times. I couldnt believe it. She used to say she liked me, loved me, wanted to be with me. I was heart broken. I spoke to her about it and she confessed to it. I stopped talking to her. That teenage love ended then and there. I was depressed for a very long period of time.

After 1.5 years I came across a girl through a mutual friend. She was amritdhari, looked kinda cute and had approached me herself. I started to like her company. She was studying at a college in Gurgaon. After some time of our friendship we both felt attracted towards each other. But she had bad company, had ONLY guy friends, used to go with em to hookah bars, pubs and all other kinda wrong places. I myself am an amritdhari and i personally do not like going to any such places as I feel that Sikhs must not go to these kinda places. (Kutha, hukkah, charas, tambaku, ganja , topi, taadi, khaaku.. inki ore na kabahuu dekhai rehetvand so sikh bisekhai) ... also came to know about her alleged physical relationships with many of her friends. So, we broke up. And I was shaken up again.

After another year of staying depressed and aloof, I came across one extremely amazing girl. She looked very decent and adorable and belonged to an amrirdhari family. Her mom ties dastar, her dad is a great man and knows a lot about gurbani and sends amazing vibes whenever you look at him. But she has had a past too and has been with 2 guys, both of them were hindus and "bihari" and i came to know from a friend who was there in her college that she has done "it" many a times with her guys and there were several pics of her floating around.

Now, By the Guru's grace, I am a Six feet tall, somewhat buffy, fair, pochviin pagg tying, amritdhari Sikh guy and I get plenty of compliments and attention from the opposite sex. I have completed 5 years of my college life at two of the most happening colleges in delhi and have had plenty of chances myself to be 'up, close and personal' with the most adored girls in my colleges. But I have made sure to not to commit any of the four 'kurehits' all these years. I consider any kind of physical intimacy as something sacred which must occur between two people who are life partners and not a mere source of pleasure which can be done with anybody. Thus, I am still a virgin. Yes, 24, male and still a virgin. And yes, I will get married sooner or later. As anybody would, I too want a Sikh girl of good morals and a high character to be my life partner, Someone who knows Sikhi values to the core, hasnt fooled around with guys and of course has her virginity intact. But seeing the current state of Sikh girls (encountering those 3 in my life, seeing Sikh girls in my college and hearing about them from my friends), Seeing all this, I have developed a negative image for girls in my mind and i do not even feel comfortable talking to them. I dont think there are many left who still stay virgin till they get married. Sometimes when sad and depressed, I feel like I should get even and feel like falling for the advances of girls around me. But when I get back to my senses I feel bad for even thinking that ways and I do not want to defy my Guru. I want a decent girl to be my life partner, bit it now seems a rare possibility. I am utterly disappointed and worried. Please help me out. I would like people who are married or in relationships and especially bibiyaan, matawan, bhainaa to please understand my problem and help me come out of it.

WJKK WJKF

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

Harsimran being an Amritdhari you should let your parents or grand parents do their duty ie find a suitable daughter in law.

Don't worry there are plenty of Sikh virgins, just follow Gurmat and you will marry one.

Finding a girl on your own is not advisable, if you do, chances of ending up with a loose wife are high.

In the mean time read

http://www.11points.com/Food-Drink/11_Foods_That_Just_Might_Kill_Your_Sex_Drive

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

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last dude said it right. Let mum dad find a good girl for you.or as you evolve in your sikhi with sangat, sometimes sangat help. Well really its God working through Sangat. N study hard for now..

But paaji remember this, Follow Your Spirit calling, if it says i wont settle less dont. if the voice inside you says sod it karnai ah jitteh marji hoi then thats upto u. But personally being a Singh and not breaking your rehat you know whats best for u.

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veero i am not going in for the marriage thingy as yet.. i dont wanna get married before 26.. but seeing and being with girls whom I showed full faith in and ended up learning that they were not as decent as I thought them to be or rather I should say they were not of the character I want my Singhnee to be.. Most of the girls over here are corrupt.. which makes me worry if I am gonna end up with some one loose..

:(

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and my point certainly is that I had great regards for my fellow Sikh bibis but seeing the current plight of Sikh girls in my city I feel pretty bad.. feel disappointed.. Sikhs these days are into adultery, intoxicants, smoking, some are even into drugs, kesaan di beadbi taan these days isnt even worth mentioning.. all kinds of things which Sikhs must not do are being done by us.. especially our sikh sisters and daughters... they are future bearers.. they hold generations within them... I do not know what has happened to them.. and why.. why have they become so corrupt..

:'(

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WJKK WJKF

Veere, had ho gay hae. Kee hoya? Oh same kitae gay han jithae college sirf parraee vaastae jaeeda hae? Jae Satguru Ji tuhanoo ithnaa khoobsoorat saroop ditta hae taa(n) tusee fehr Guru Ji ta shukrr karo. Yaad karo jis vehlae tusee college pehlae din chalaee san tuhada khyaal sirf parraee vich c. fikr dhiaan parraee vich c - hon tusee kaeree khotee kamma vich paegae ho? Jae sade vudae vudaeraeyaan nae girlfriend boyfriend nay c rakhae - kee ohna da viaah nayhee c hoya? Afsoos dee gal hae ki ajj talaak kafee ho raehae han - koike apaan apnae vuddaeaan dee knowledge too(n) kunj gae haa(n) - apaan is traa(n) kar lag paee haa(n) ki sanoo hee putta husband wife kis traa(n) dae hundae han (kal dae jamae...). Tuhadae vaastae oochee suchee Singhnee labnee Waheguru ate thuadae mata pita da kam hae. Tuhada kam sirf parran ate Ardaas karn da hae. Ehmee na tension laenda rehaa kar. Kureeyaa(n) keeaa oh? Jis traa(n) app khaa laeyaa, bhaelaeya, hag laeyaa, soh laeeyaa - oh vee oh kardeeyaan han - Jae tuhanoo eh traa(n) dee kureeaa(n) khoobsoorat lagdee han - muaaf karna - tuhadee akh hee nayhee dekhn vaalee... Yaad karo - Guru Granth Sahib Ji sanoo dasdae han ki 'Sae Sohnae; Jo Har Sang Bhaehnae' - Only those are beautiful who sit in the Sangat of Guru Ji and Their Holy Sangat' - too kitae turaeyaa firdaa vaa?

Naalee tusee akheyaa mae 21 haa(n) ate halae virgin haa(n) - fehr? Eh dae vich sangan dee lohr hae? Jis traa(n) ingh chaundae han ki meree Singhnee jat sat vich pukee hovae - Singhneeyaa vee eh hee chaundeeyaan han ki mera Singh Jat Sat vich pukka hovae. Satguru Ji nae sanoo Insaan banaeyaa hae - sirf ohs naal hee buchae paedaa karn da karm apanee Patee/Patnee naal hee karna - ehmee nee jaanvaraan vaang saraeyaan naal litee jaanaa.

Be a Singh - ehmee naa kureeyaan dae dholan lag jao = shameful gal ki ajj Singh kureeyaan mugar "depress" hon lag pae han - Singh oh han jaerae maut noo dekh kae hasdae san.

Penji

(Toronto, Canada)

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dear bhenji..

sabh ton pehlaan taan waheguru ji ka khalsa... waheguru ji ki fateh...

mai ap ji da boht thanks karda haan jo tusi apna samaa kaddh ke reply kita.. bhenji mai aj kal diyaan kudiyaan de vartaava dekh ke depress hoya haan.. they've gone corrupt.. things which make me worry are ke appaan kede paase ja rahe haan !! bibiyaan, jihna ne future generations nu janam dena hai.. je oh aap hee puthe raahe pai gaiyaan taan asi apniyaan aunn waliyaan generations ton kee umeed rakhange !!

naale bhenji i am 24 not 21.. and yes i am a virgin.. and i plan to stay so till I marry.. i see physical intimacy as something sacred which must occur between two life partners.. sikhaan nu jagah jagah muhh maaran wale kamm shobha nahi dende.. i echo your words that both Singhs and singhnees should stay pakke in jat sat.. dear bhenji we are both on the same wavelength.. may be you didnt read my post completely or i dunno what.. but i have no qualms in being a virgin.. if i myself am not pakka in something then how can i seek someone who is pakki...

all i said and meant, was, that seeing the current plight of Sikh girls distresses me.. and i am worried about what if i end up marrying someone loose..

i hope i was able to put myself clearly this time to my fellow singhs and singhnees, my veers and bhains.. i seek your help and that is why i chose to put up my query here in this forum..

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WJKK WJKF

I am a Sikh guy from Delhi. I want to ask a question about Sikh girls, virginity and sex before marriage. But first, I want to tell you about what has driven me to come here and ask this question.

I used to like a girl in the final year of my school. She used to like me too. We used to blush a lot while talking to each other and We used to talk to each other a lot. We told each other about our feelings and felt good about it. Later we went to different colleges. One day there was a cultural event in her college, I came to know of it from my friends in that college, and thought I should surprise her. I went there with my friends and saw her with some other guy, dancing, laughing and having her fun. I felt awkard and bad seeing that but I tried to ignore having seen what I had seen. When I asked my friends about that guy, they said he was her guy, and they had seen them making out quite a few times. I couldnt believe it. She used to say she liked me, loved me, wanted to be with me. I was heart broken. I spoke to her about it and she confessed to it. I stopped talking to her. That teenage love ended then and there. I was depressed for a very long period of time.

After 1.5 years I came across a girl through a mutual friend. She was amritdhari, looked kinda cute and had approached me herself. I started to like her company. She was studying at a college in Gurgaon. After some time of our friendship we both felt attracted towards each other. But she had bad company, had ONLY guy friends, used to go with em to hookah bars, pubs and all other kinda wrong places. I myself am an amritdhari and i personally do not like going to any such places as I feel that Sikhs must not go to these kinda places. (Kutha, hukkah, charas, tambaku, ganja , topi, taadi, khaaku.. inki ore na kabahuu dekhai rehetvand so sikh bisekhai) ... also came to know about her alleged physical relationships with many of her friends. So, we broke up. And I was shaken up again.

After another year of staying depressed and aloof, I came across one extremely amazing girl. She looked very decent and adorable and belonged to an amrirdhari family. Her mom ties dastar, her dad is a great man and knows a lot about gurbani and sends amazing vibes whenever you look at him. But she has had a past too and has been with 2 guys, both of them were hindus and "bihari" and i came to know from a friend who was there in her college that she has done "it" many a times with her guys and there were several pics of her floating around.

Now, By the Guru's grace, I am a Six feet tall, somewhat buffy, fair, pochviin pagg tying, amritdhari Sikh guy and I get plenty of compliments and attention from the opposite sex. I have completed 5 years of my college life at two of the most happening colleges in delhi and have had plenty of chances myself to be 'up, close and personal' with the most adored girls in my colleges. But I have made sure to not to commit any of the four 'kurehits' all these years. I consider any kind of physical intimacy as something sacred which must occur between two people who are life partners and not a mere source of pleasure which can be done with anybody. Thus, I am still a virgin. Yes, 24, male and still a virgin. And yes, I will get married sooner or later. As anybody would, I too want a Sikh girl of good morals and a high character to be my life partner, Someone who knows Sikhi values to the core, hasnt fooled around with guys and of course has her virginity intact. But seeing the current state of Sikh girls (encountering those 3 in my life, seeing Sikh girls in my college and hearing about them from my friends), Seeing all this, I have developed a negative image for girls in my mind and i do not even feel comfortable talking to them. I dont think there are many left who still stay virgin till they get married. Sometimes when sad and depressed, I feel like I should get even and feel like falling for the advances of girls around me. But when I get back to my senses I feel bad for even thinking that ways and I do not want to defy my Guru. I want a decent girl to be my life partner, bit it now seems a rare possibility. I am utterly disappointed and worried. Please help me out. I would like people who are married or in relationships and especially bibiyaan, matawan, bhainaa to please understand my problem and help me come out of it.

WJKK WJKF

hahahahhahahah :lol2: so far I thought I have grown up and raised in london so I have seen the worst sikh girls ever..................lol..but you shocked me...anyways I want to say If you are Guru Ka sikh then you don't need to be busy in KAAM and its very Clear that Today Singh is still better than Kaur .There is no doubt regarding this.

and my second view is that Why do you go after only sikh girls? you ain't losing sikhi if some non sikh girl gets married with you and embraces sikhi..I know Hypocrite and stupid sikh people make useless assumptions that non sikh girls cannot take sikhi on long term basis...In my point of view ,,today if we see around ourselves ,,,you are gonna see non sikh girls are being great kaurs instead of those sikh girls who were just born in sikh families ....

I give you my Example ...My grandfather married to Muslim Girl and she gave birth to three male children and two female children and she educated sikhi to them so nicely that I can't tell you and in the same way my hindu mum married sardar(my father) she educated us two brothers sikhi like I bet no any sikh women could do like that .

At last ......we are a mixture of Amritdhari/keshdhari people in our family . we don't even like to sit in cutsurds...Jide sir te paag nai jedha guru di beadbi kare ya kardi..oh jutti diyan nokka brabar hi a..paave lakh sohne banke jaag nu dikhado..but they can't in front of GURUS>>>>>>>>>>

naale ik gal hor...tusi bhena ,bibbiyan kolo koi jwaab na mango....hehe...unha ne thavada hi kasooor kadna va.......be a singh TRUE SINGH>>>>>>>>>>>BECAUSE ITS HAWTTTTT>>>>>>> WE guys HAVE GOT SOMETHING SPECIAL>>>>>AND WE HAVE TO MAKE IT PRECIOUS ALWAYS>>>>>>>

EVERY SINGH GETS HIS KAUR but do the KAUR????No my dear.So believe in yourself only Whaheguru is there he is gonna help you soon.best of luck

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Hold on are not all women before marriage supposed to be looked upon as sister, mother and then the same after marriage and only a wife to be looked upon intimately ?, seems like what luckysingh said it happens much more in india now than in the west, decent girls will never entertain you or anyone else, there are good girls from good families out there and not necessarily amritdharis but you would expect amritdharis to set and example!, you will have to wait until Guru ji is ready for you to meet your live partner, maybe all these experiences you have had are a lesson from Guru ji that you being amritdhari should not be looking for girl friends.

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hahahahhahahah :lol2: so far I thought I have grown up and raised in london so I have seen the worst sikh girls ever..................lol..but you shocked me...anyways I want to say If you are Guru Ka sikh then you don't need to be busy in KAAM and its very Clear that Today Singh is still better than Kaur .There is no doubt regarding this.

What does the highlighted text mean exactly mr sukhi007 veerji. Please explain yourself.

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