Not2Cool2Argue

Our rehit/lifestyle basic tenants, don't come from Gurbani which is in poetry form. They come from oral traditions and other writings. Also who says poetry has to have different interpretations? thats a pretty narrow, western educated point of view. Gurbani is praised for being in the language of the ppl, so ofc its aim was to be straightforward. Just read sukhmani sahib. No way can there be 2 interpretations. With Gods simran, you get all blessings. Following the bachan of satguru is the way to salvation. No 2 ways about it. plus many saints have tried the sikh method and its worked.

I think thats covered by the bachan, Jab lag khalsa rehe nyara, tab lag tej dio mai sara. We have to remain distinct from the time period/society, in order to succeed spiritually.

What do you mean by the above? are you still seeing the married lady? If so, then before asking for advice, do the obvious: stop! If you want to be forgiven, there are 2 conditions: Never repeat the sin/mistake again and be repentant. Being repentant (doing paath/seva while continuing the mistake/sin is not helpful.) So please stop seeing the married woman. You are helping her be sinful and putting her family and future at risk. If she is found out, she will be kicked out of her house, and if she has kids, it will ruin the kids life. The kids will live in a broken family and people will laugh at them, and say no one knows who their real father is. Yes, kaam/lust is a big obstacle and has been likened to the strongest hunter. Many ppl have fallen victim to it. But you have to have a limit. no matter what lustful things you do, never be with a married women again. That is the biggest sin! stop ASAP I think adultery should be seen as a crime, its not only a sin but a crime against the whole community. so advice 1) stop seeing the married woman 2) never again approach a married woman 3) promise to yourself that married women are off liimits. No matter how far you fall, you will never cross this line again. 4) if you dont do the above, there is no use for further advice. if you are ready for further help, let us know. check this out, since you seem to have drug issues too:

For the ardaas you can say ' Aap ji di kirpa de naal, es shabad de 21 paath kite han. Eh paath changi pardai vaste kite han. App ji ne kirpa karni, vidhia ate pardhai da daan bakhshana. Jo pardha oh samaj aave te emtihaan vich madid hove. Kirpa karni ke panjabi bolni aa jaave. ' Translation: with ur grace, 21 recitations have been done of this shabad. This recitation wa done for a good education. Please bless me with the gift of knowlege and education. Whatever I may read, may i understand and may it help.me on my exams. Also bless.me that i can come to speak panjabi. I didnt add the 5 paaths, because i think the instructions say to do those when u r abt to open ur books. Like just mentally recite them 5x. And say mentally may my studying be fruiful and my attention remain fixed on studying : 'pardhai safal hovai, chit lagaa rehe'Like a quick silent prayer sitting at ur desk. Then begin. Also God understands english. So its really good that u r saying it in panjabi. After saying it in panjabi, say it again in english in ur own words so u can say it from ur heart. And in case u didnt say it right in panjabi, it wont matter if u repeat it in english.

Both parents have to be good looking. Not just the wife.

We do have a lot of tales/sakhis warning not to marry with a huge age difference. Like marrying a girl with an old rich dude. Im sure the old rich dude married for beauty so... The tales r in dasam granth. In charitropakhyan. The whole premise of charitropakhyan is that a king loved his wife. She was beautiful and gave him a son. Then she died and he was sad until he saw.the orrisa kings daughter. She was beautiful and looked like his wife. He was old yet he still married her. But the wife had a crush on his son. She tried to entice him, but the son turned her down. Saying u r my mother. In anger the wife lied to the king that the son tried to force her and the king arrested the son. The mantri/vizeer knew the son was innocent. So he told the raja stories abt how women use wiles/charitars to manipulate ppl. Then those stories r mentioned. In the end, i think the raja frees his son.

I dont know....i think looking for a good-looking person as a daughter-in-law is good. Because you are more likely to have good-looking children, and it will be easier to marry them off. Plus in arranged marriages, we need some way to weed out bad genes. In the west, love marriages ensure, only the ppl with good looks/triats get married and pass on their genes due to mating selection. In arranged marriages, everyone gets married, so the bad genes continue in our society. I think tall ppl should marry tall ppl, so that we have more tall ppl in our community. Ofc it is too bad for bad looking people, but in the future, there will be less and less of the bad looking ppl. Ofc, diversity is important which means having ppl with bad looks, because they might have genes lacking in other types of ppl.

Kalyug is more a time period, and refers to society. Where more people are materialistic and less into spirituality. And there is so much distraction in the world, so much pleasure that we become sick of it. Suicide is highest now. All the ancient rules, societies, technology, knowledge has become obsolete. It is either forgotten or no longer relevant. Like the caste system, the strict religious rules, the gender roles, magic etc. I think kalyug refers to the what is most valued in society and what is seen as the highest goal. In satyug, spirituality was the goal, and good character was valued most. Now its success and materialistic achievments

All the gurus who wrote bani (6 gurus) and bhagat bani was all collected and is present in Guru Granth Sahib Ji. But the gurbani that Guru Gobind Singh Ji wrote, they did not add to Guru Granth Sahib Ji. Instead it is in a separate granth. That Granth is known as Dasam Granth. It has lots of banis in it. Most of them have to do with war and battle and weapons and one about women and some describe the ancient avataars/ incarnations/gods of india. . You should listen to it. Youtube Dasam Granth bani It has lots of bani for protection and could help uplift you and maybe help with depression.

Ego is the wall that seperates us from waheguru. Like if a king had a dream that he was a begger. In the dream he suffers because he believes he is a begger. He steals food because he is hungry and has no money. So ego is us thinking we r seperate from God. But in actuality we are one. That is the whole point of a human life. We have forgotten we are a part of God. And our job is to connect back to God. But there are many things stopping us. First is believing we are alone and helpless. If we knew, we are a part of God, we would never be lonely or sad or scared. And we would never do anything bad. Because we dont need to. If God is on our side. We can have anything. Second is our desires. We want things and lust, anger, greed, attachment, and pride use that to control us. So we must remember God and connect back with him. We must realize, we are not the body. We are the soul. Which is a part of God. One day the body will die, and we will only be the soul. And we will weep, because for our temporary bodys sake we did so many bad things. To other souls. We stole,lied, hurt, cheated people. So we sin because we have forgotten we are not this body. We will not be in this world forever. We forget our soul, God and the afterlife.

As long as indian govt has the power and the force. Not much will change. Ofc to pacify the youth, govt will promise some things. Then go back. The best way to get indian gov to do something is fear. This referendum strikes fear into them. They will be do.more for panjab. Also the referendum can be used as an example by other oppressed communities. And they can fet their own soverign state or at least ask for rights.

Im glad somebody had the courage to stand up to the left especially the LGBT community. Im not against them, but too much of anything is bad and they were going too far. I dont know if I agree with him abt women and men differences tho.

Stay away from alcohol and drugs,.once addicted its hard to leave them alone. They take over ur life. They let u have fun and pleasure while doing nothing. Staring into space. This messes up ur motivation, reward system. Girls. Same thing. U will end up with alot of relationship baggage and drama. Plus u will get used having another person around. This makes it hard to enjoy ur own company or loneliness. The more fun, pleasurable things u do. The more ur mind will get used to them and u will be looking for the next high.it will make u unfulfilled, depressed and addicted. So its better to be simple. Theres pleasure in small things. Going to movies, hanging out with family, good food. Nature etc. If you really want happiness and fun. Ge it from doing fun, pleasurable things. The greatest sense of happiness comes feom accomplishing hard things. So go travel the world, join a sport, go skydiving, learn a skill and become auccessful at it, build ur body, learn to meditate, accomplish things. Volunteer, maybe go woth khalsa aid. Learn to cook. You want to spend ur youth doing things for which u wont have time or strength for later. Life is gonna get busy soon. So go make memories that u would want to tell ur grandchildren. Like climbing mt everest. Or winning mma competitions. Also now is the best time to get good in sikhi. To be fully in it. Later on when u have a jib and kids. Ur life will be the same as everybody else. So take the time now to attend camps, do abhiyaas 10 japji sahibs daily and hours of samadhi. Attend rainsbhais, they are the best. Ur idea abt procrastinating now and getting into sikhi would be good IF u could be sure of the time u have left. But noone know when they will die. So the best way to live life is as if u were gonna die tommorow. So live it with full passion. Go have fun and do sikhi at the same time. Do both with full passion and enthusiasm as if its ur last day. Idk wat type of fun u cant have as a sikh. Only the type thats riddled with diseases and harm: drugs and dating. Fashion, u can do as a sikh. Check out street singh guy. And go have some real fun where u actually do interesting things. Have a bucket list with fun,.dangerous, cool.things. and do it. Like drag racing, ATV dune riding. Shooting AK-47. Visiting a war zone. Having a video go viral.

Thats too bad..but the 13 week course is recorded on utube. You should definetly watch it. It covers all of sikh history from the gurus to 1984.

Actually, lots of ppl already deal.with this. Like.in our gurudwara, the 5 parshadey for gurusahib (that will be sent for bhog) are made on the tava and not put directly on the fire. But for sangat, the parshadey are put on the fire, directly on the natural gas fumes. Also, fiver is pavitar. Anything passed thru it is considered pavitar in suchimta terms at least in sanatan/hindu view. And those sanatan ppl were wise. Also fire sterilizes. As long as the smell isnt too bad. I think its ok to use for biogas for langar.

Well if that much labour went into it, i wouldnt want these structures destroyed Also dont worry, the hindus r dealing with the same issues. One govt guy wanted o raze down taj mahel but another guy convinced him to keep it because of the hindus who laboured on it. For the builders sake keep it, forget the badshah

True. But i think as long as we sikhs believe in reincarnation and karm, then we should limit eating animals. Who knows how long we will believe in that tho. Ofc eggs r animal products like honey and milk. But some sikhs also believe that wat u eat determines ur mood and budhi...so as eggs contain a chicken basically so meat.... Tho in this day and age, the less u eat the better. But our ppl eat too much refined carbs and get diabetes

Yes i think disowning until they have kids. They r making a big decision in life. U dont want them to make it without thinking of the consequences. So make it really hard for them. So that u know that even after all this suffering, they stuck to their position. Also u want to get involved once kids r in the pics so they know abt their roots.

Gurfateh! Check out these sites. They will help u in sikhi: Gurmatbibek.com Go to their literature section amd read.the inspiring stories. Also if u can understand panjabi, google bhai vir singh letters. And listen to them. Also start doing paath with meanings. If you dont have time. Make it a goal to read at least 1 pauri of each bani with english translations. Guru Granth sahib is there to answer our questions. Like who is God. What does he look like. What is he like? That is why try to read alittle bit of bani with meanings everyday. Also, we have been seperated from God for thousands of years. And in.the meantime our soul has picked up sins and bad habits and wrong thoughts. Like our soul thinks this world is real and God is fake. This has become a hardgrained conviction. So we must try to ovetcome our bad habits and thoughts and sins. As we have had thousands of years to collect them. It will take a while to get rid of them. Things like anger,.lust,.pride etc. The world thinks they are normal. You are starting from kindergarten of sikhi. Dasam Duar is the degree you earn upon graduation. It takes a long time to get an education and degree. So same way it will take a while. In the beginning,.when u were learning ABCs. It seemed rediculous. You would rather spend ur time playing as it was fun. ABCs were boring and repititive and of no use to you. Only later u learnt to read with them. And then using reading u learnt about law. Then u got ur degree. So if now u have doubts. Thats good. It means u are an intelligent person. Keep thinking and learning. The doubts show u have not learnt about sikhi yet. So dont treat sikhi as a phase please. Like one day i am inspired and the next not. Treat it as school. Somedays u wanted to go,.somedays u didnt. But u still had to go anyways. Same way. Dont let ur emotions rule u. Tell urself,.I am attending school of sikhi. So decide how many times per week u will go to gurudwara, how much simran and paath u will do daily and at wat times. Please be realistic. Make sikhi a habit not a race. Make sure there are other things in ur life too. Like school work, family time,.hanging out with friends. But dont forget to take attendance at the gurudwara at least weekly. And do ur lessons (gurbani) daily. And do attend 1 lecture (katha) daily. And do listen to the assembly(kirtan). And do practice tests (simran) daily. If u passed the test, u will feel blissful, connected to God. But if u werent able to concentrate, then u failed. But thats ok. Its a practice test. The more u take,.the better u will be. Do this whether u have doubts or not. And depending on how much u learn and how strict u r in ur schedule. U will graduate( dasam duar). But please dont accept miracles or dasam duaar, the first time u do simran. It takes alot of practice.

I think ur right. But its important to distinguish between pyaar and moh. When its moh, theres always the mine in it. I love you because ur my son. I think panjabi parents are always using moh. Their love is conditional and they r trying to mold u into wat they want. And they want to posess u and keep u. While love is more, just appreciating and enjoying someones presence. For the time you have with them without conditions. When Sahibzada Jujhar Singh wanted to go fight in battle. No punjabi parent wouldve let them go. Even if the child wanted to. Even if not fighting wouldve let the child be captured. So real love is looking beyond their relationship.to you.. Even my little brother asked, did Guruji really like his sons. After watching the 3D sahibzade movie. Because in it they show guru ji as a picture with a frozen face all.throughout the movie. And i had to show him the part in the movie which shows guruji hugging the sahibzade. (With the same frozen expression tho.) But u just have to look at how the gurus family was treated. They lived in splendor and were treated reverentially. At this most sikhs would say that Guruji did "love" them and if there was no shaheedi that guruji indulged and spoiled them.see but when time came for hardship, allowing is family to undergo hardship.is not love. Tho i think it is. As it allows them to choose and be leaders and participate in a challenge. I think this debate of whether the gurus felt pain and emotion is complicated. They did but they knew there was something higher and better. And we can know this too and conquer pain. Ofc theres parchaariks who say that Bhai mati daas ji being cut into pieces didnt feel anything because he could leave his body and was a brahmgiani. But i think.its because the parchaarik thinks the pain is unbearable. That if it was felt, no way could it be borne. That just shows his limit.

Omg! I thought i was the only one. All shabads by Guru Ramdaas Ji so emotional and i musy admit they are always my favorite. When M4 comes in sehaj paath im always like this is gonna be good. And it always is. Just yesterday i was thinking its too bad theres no M4 bani in nitnem. Ive been thinking this a long time, that the gurbani of each of the gurus follows the earthly life they lived. Guru Nanak dev jis bani is always so philosophical yet so simple and varied in languages as Guruji traveled alot and tried to explain the complex philosophies in simple terms. In household terms. Thats why the metaphors are always like making dahi or marriage or etc. To me, Guru amardaas Jis bani is almost always about finding the true guru and not wasting life. And as that was a major theme in their life it makes sense. Guru Ramdas Ji always addresses God as Mother/Father and as they were an orphan..this makes sense. And Guru Arjan dev ji is a master poet. Using so many different styles and raags and taals..its amazing. Guru Tegh Bahadur ji is ofc very tyaagmai bani which matches their life.

I think all this happened when sikhi got split into sehajdharis and amritdharis. Before everyone would take amrit before their anand karaj and so kept rehit when young. Like learning japji sahib, not eating out, not cutting hair. It was basically part of our culture. Like covering ur hair, not talking to opposite gender, and not doing drugs. In the west, most punjabis have kept the bad punjabi culture like bhangra and alcohol and treating men better than women and got rid of all the sikhi related culture because they think its only for amritdharis. And as preachers and babas became more strict, the general sikh population has become lax. I think in our gurudwaras we need to start teaching the basics. Like to be a sikh means to be a good person and to at least do japji sahib daily and to learn panjabi and no dating until u r ready to get married.Then later on we can talk about keeping ur hair, the importance of dasam granth, of shaasters of 1984, of SRM. I think basics of sikhi was kind of doing this. They were getting thru to the lay panjabi person. Who just want a spiritual sikhi without all the rules..

Martyrs and the United Shades of America segment on Sikhs Not to mention all the 1984 documentaries from BBC and others

Culture involves doing rituals. Things with no practical meaning. Culture actually consists of language, food, belief system, peoples, holidays, ceremonies, rituals, rites, morals, and religion, lifestyle What you are mentioning is only religious things. Do u do nothing outside ur religion? Do u celebrate birthdays? Wedding receptions? All these are actually western culture yet we have adopted it cuz we live there too. Nothing wrong with that. Some hindus speak panjabi, eat saag and roti. Do we give it up? Some holidays are built into indian cale dar like christmas, easter, and halloween are here. They lose their religious significance and become festivals. Its good to not do any rituals, and do practical things, but society loves holidays and rituals esp children. And i would rather they celwbrate rakhri then valentines. This mindset of stopping ppl from doing things that are mostly harmless, cuz one doesnt agree with them is not good. The children are deprived of good times and lose link to their past. Yes u can factually tell them abt being panjabi, but actions matter more. Also, the gurus never stopped ppl point blank. They just gave it a better meaning. Holi to holla mohalla. Diwaali to bandi shorh diwaas. So we still celwbratw but the meaning behind it has changed. So celebrate birthdays, rakhri, halloween and allow ur kids to have fun But explain the empty ritualism behind it or give it another, better meaning. Like in our culture, we think family is better and should be celwbrated not some strangers on valentines. I was raised with a dad who was anti everything. It leaves u feeking disconnected and superior to the world. And then u come tumbling down. Teach ur kids how to celebrate and laugh with the world while knowing the truth

I think the real question should be, what is the purpose of cutting hair? If its hygiene or for easieness. Then why do women have longer hair? Also the importance isnt having hair but keeping hair. The more u cut, the more ur body will try to grow. That wastes bodiea resources. Also think abt evolution. Why would it waste bodya reaources on hair. Unless there was a need for it? U will say nails. But nails were naturlly pared down thats why they grow. Also its the 1st step in accepting hukam. Its like a lesson to trust God and trust wat he made is good tho we dont understand.