I Want To Wear A Dastar

[Guest :(]

What do you do when you want to wear a dastaar but your mum doesn't?

Both my parents are Amrit-dhari but mum doesn't wear a dastar (please dont make this a debate about which amrit is better now). I dont want it to seem as though I'm telling her she's wrong (indirectly) by wearing a dastar once I take Amrit. My mum's a very strong person who's always wanting the best for me and usually makes a lot of the big decisions for me too. Now if I take Amrit and wear a dastar, she will without a doubt feel as though she's doing something wrong or I'm too religious :lol: and I don't want to hurt her feelings. I haven't discussed this ambition with her because I'm still trying to polish up on other areas of my sikhi first!

what should I do? I have a friend who is also in the exact same situation except that her father is against akj - PLEASE PLEASE do not make this into a jathas debate or which is best amrit debate. I need some help and would appreciate some advice.

[Guest Guest]

So you feel you cannot follow any more Rehat than another person because you feel this may offend them?

Dastar is a compulsory part of Sikh Roop and there is no excuse not to wear it. Your mother will not be offended and more likely may be inspired to follow. Furthermore, if your mother did not wake up at Amritvela and was offended if you did, would this give you an excuse not to wake up at Amritvela? Most certainly not.

[Guest ummm]

well am guna say from experience...parents always have something against children cumin up into sikhi...even if they are amritdhari themselves cuz ive seen most situations like that myself..i mean at the end of the day put it this way...who do you want to please your parents or guruji? that will be the answer to your question?

guruji is always there for his sikhs and even if you think that you are hurting someones feelings...you cannot please everyone? .......the ones who mind dont matter....the ones who matter dont mind

may guruji bless you with courage to make a right decision..

bhul chuk maaf

gurfateh jee

[Guest Guest]

you're only worried, but they're baseless feelings

why don't you talk to your mom first. see if she'll ACTUALLY be mad?

[canadian_sikh]

wjkk wjkf

i will leave you with one line

"who is more powerful, will always have un-conditional love for you, will always take care of you, is your eternal Father and Mother, your mom, or God"

TOON MERA PITA TOON HAI MERA MATA

TOON MERA BHANDIP TOON MERA BHRAATA

YOU ARE MY FATHER YOU ARE MY MOTHER

YOUR ARE BY BEST FRIEND YOU ARE MY BROTHER

bhul chuk maaf,

wjkk wjkf

[Guest Guest]

bhenji

you wanna tie a dastaar...why would ya mum get mad at the idea...it takes alot of courage to wear a dastaar bhenji especially fo a female...she's gonna be proud of ya bhenji....u got the guts to wear one...so go fo it...i'm sure she's not gonna get disappointed or nethin like tht....make her proud man

i've seen alot of galz with dastaarz but their mumz dont wear dastaarz but they r proud of their galz...its nothin to be mad bout bhenji...stop the negative thinkin.....stay in chardi kala bhenji

[gurupanth]

Summer is here soon, so get practicing before you get back to school. When I used to go back to school after summer holidays, my classmates always changed somehow: some changed for the worse and some for the better. My point is that I expected changes after summer so this is an ideal oppurtunity to change and perfect your dastar - and impress your mates when you go back to school. When I first wore a dastaar I practiced it evey day of the summer holidays as I wanted it to be perfect and to tie it in a reasonable amount of time each morning. Come september of that year and I forgot that I was wearing a dastaar for the first time to school since I was wearing it for the past 4 weeks non-stops whilst going shopping, gurdwara, trips, cinema, and at home.

I have no doubt your mother will support you if shes always thinking for your best. Most parents are usually overwhelmed if their kids are inclined towards sikhi and often want them to surpass their achievements

[Guest --]

talk to your mom, it will work out

[Heera Singh]

I don't understand how it will hurt anyones feelings?... if nething I would think ur parents would be proud of you if you did... the only thing you gotta do is never look down upon them and alwayz be humble about urself... other then that, i don't see why ur parents would have any issues about you wearing a dastaar...