Very Very Mature Topic

[Guest _Singh_]

I think the most of your post is really good and it sounds like your rehit is really strong, much stronger than mine BUT you say you would only hug someone if they have a shower first? If Waheguru blesses you with children will you ask them to have a shower first before hugging them? would you say the same thing to your parents? like where does it stop?

Also would you shower aswell before hugging your future husband or does this rule only apply to others?

To me it seems a bit egotisticle that you think that you are cleaner than others they and should shower before they come into contact with you. I maybe wrong but this is how it seems to me. I dont mean to cause offence but thats how i read it like i said i maybe wrong.

Bhul chuk marf

Vaheguru ji ka khalsa vaheguru ji ki fateh

[Guest alone]

Fateh ji. Thanks for the replies everyone.

Tarrandeep Penji I cannot log into my account (I was put on moderation ages ago and so I think it might be something to do with that). I haven't got an account on tapoban since i see myself as only being sikh. I really don't like to get into jatha stuff but I'll join that forum and let you know my ID so message me from there.

Other than that I am sorry if I have caused offence or upset anyone. Looking back on my post I literally wrote as if I was writing in my personal diary...I think I kinda poured my heart out :(Thanks to lonely bhenji and gurpreet behnji for ure replies. Also th!nk veerji is right - computers use energy so I don't think I can ever do anything correct but I will try to do as much as I can. There is actually so much more to do like many people have mentionned.

I'm really sorry if people think I have OCD. I know I believe in sucham alot. Even as a kid I felt disgusted when people used to share their coke can. I see it as joot. I think its probably been my upbringing cos back in our family house there is alot of sucham - we don't do things like tasting food whilst it is cooking etc. About toileting then please read this article http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_cleansing There are many different practices but urea and faces harbour alot of germs and toilet paper leaves particles on ure bottom. There is a term for this as faeces gets stuck on bum hair. (If I remember the word I will let you all know).

Also I did use toilet paper but then I did some independent thinking and which led me to the decision that water will always be the best option. Leaving faeces and urea can cause skin problems, urinary tract infections etc so its better to just remove it straight away rather than letting the germs grow, these tiny particles then get on ure clothes and most people then wait till the next day to remove the smudged faeces in the shower. An example I would like to give is how recently there has been an emphasis on washing hands in hospitials whereas previously there was relatively little. This shows that society and its norms are continously changing so we shouldn't really think about the majority....rather we should focus on what is better. I guess I might differ on how to wash but this is where my careful thinking has led me.

To my veer daas13 I don't want to lie to myself and my happiness is knowing that I was honest and did what I knew was best. I wouldn't say I am depressed but sometimes I do sit and think if anyone else has been through this. I cannot explain the why and how and extent of everything in my post as it will take too long but I think I have found my answer. Sometimes we need to be the change we wish to see.

If I have caused more confusion then I am sorry. People have recommended for me to go Khalsa Camp UK. I dunno if I should go as I have never been to any camp but If I do go then anyone is free to come and talk to me there.

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh.

[RKang17]

R U actually happy wid ur life?

[carin]

I'm really sorry if people think I have OCD. I know I believe in sucham alot. Even as a kid I felt disgusted when people used to share their coke can. I see it as joot. I think its probably been my upbringing cos back in our family house there is alot of sucham - we don't do things like tasting food whilst it is cooking etc. About toileting then please read this article http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_cleansing There are many different practices but urea and faces harbour alot of germs and toilet paper leaves particles on ure bottom. There is a term for this as faeces gets stuck on bum hair. (If I remember the word I will let you all know).

Also I did use toilet paper but then I did some independent thinking and which led me to the decision that water will always be the best option. Leaving faeces and urea can cause skin problems, urinary tract infections etc so its better to just remove it straight away rather than letting the germs grow, these tiny particles then get on ure clothes and most people then wait till the next day to remove the smudged faeces in the shower.

That's more info than I ever care to read. Sorry, but that's just gross. I'm begining to think why you were put on moderation.

[Guest stranger-still]

dear bhenji,

reading your post was like reading my own biography (except the frequency of intercourse - don't knock it till you've tried it). :console:

you should follow your chosen path and find like minded sangat, they do exist.

[Revolutionary]

dear bhenji,

reading your post was like reading my own biography (except the frequency of intercourse - don't knock it till you've tried it). :console:

you should follow your chosen path and find like minded sangat, they do exist.

r u a munda or kuri?

just wondering

[Tarrandeep Kaur]

ok penji, or email me at this old account;

and i will give you my propa email address from there.

ignorant_fool87@yahoo.co.uk

(admin i know we arent supposed to give details over the site, but i;d like to speak with this bibi, thanks)

[singh_bling]

I'm really sorry if people think I have OCD. I know I believe in sucham alot. Even as a kid I felt disgusted when people used to share their coke can. I see it as joot. I think its probably been my upbringing cos back in our family house there is alot of sucham - we don't do things like tasting food whilst it is cooking etc. About toileting then please read this article http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_cleansing There are many different practices but urea and faces harbour alot of germs and toilet paper leaves particles on ure bottom. There is a term for this as faeces gets stuck on bum hair. (If I remember the word I will let you all know).

Also I did use toilet paper but then I did some independent thinking and which led me to the decision that water will always be the best option. Leaving faeces and urea can cause skin problems, urinary tract infections etc so its better to just remove it straight away rather than letting the germs grow, these tiny particles then get on ure clothes and most people then wait till the next day to remove the smudged faeces in the shower.

That's more info than I ever care to read. Sorry, but that's just gross. I'm begining to think why you were put on moderation.

lollllllll

[Guest Guest]

Bhainji, there is absolutely nothing wrong in your behaviour and how you feel and are acting. It is good to keep sucham and refrain from jhoot - there is nothing wrong with this. Honestly, if you want to stay free from Jatha then I don't think you need to attend any Camps or anything. In your heart, you have your intuition and you know what's right and wrong, deep down inside. You don't need other people tot ell you this, as you are Guru Ji's daughter! There are all types of people on a public forum so please don't allow yourself to be hurt by what anyone on here says.

I am actually proud of you and impressed that you do not feel anything to any particular gender. This is an amazing quality; being above lust. Marriage in Sikhi is based on the soul, not the body, anyways, and I hope with Ardas you will find a Singh that is also above lust and would like to get married for the spiritual benefits only. I don't think it's good to have a crush on every g uy/girl left right and centre, like people do today. That's so wrong, so horrible, but it happens to many of us, and I'm so glad it hasn't happened to you.

Bhainji I think everything you're doing is fine, and with Ardas, you will find a like minded Singh. I don't think you need to attend any Camp or follow any Jatha, just follow Gursikhi and follow your heart... Everything will be ok. Lots of love dear sister. Strength to you!

[Guest Not 2 Different]

I like some others on this forum have found a lot of what you wrote to resonate. When we think there is no one feeling like we are or facing the problems we are, I've found as a rule, we aren't nearly as unique or alone as we might feel. I believe in almost all the things you've written, with a few exceptions. I mean, I totally hear you on the washroom points though I don't think I've ever seen anyone state this so boldly. I also find pants, etc. to be indecent. I find outside food to be disgusting.

That having been said, I don't believe in veganism because Guru Sahib wasn't vegan. It would exclude us from having degh. That having been said, I don't agree with how milk products are obtained nowadays.

I think the touching people issues and problems with hugging, etc. are more to do with personal history, experience etc.

As someone who started out much like you, and having met others on this path like you and I, I'll tell you that as time goes on, you'll find that your pre-occupation with the finer details of sucham that some people may see as obssessive will begin to fall away. The only thing that is really suchi is naam and that's just something we have to live with. One day you may have the thought that how funny is it that something as nirmal as the jot is housed in something like a body. It's a funny paradox that at once makes you want to rise above the body and the world but at the same time realise that while you are in the body, you can never really be free of jooth. We can only try our best and that too as far as our capacity will allow us. Don't let these things break you off from other Gursikhs or make living life a daily obstacle. When our every day life is focussed solely on overcoming obstacles like what to eat, how to go from A to B, etc. we may find much less time to do the really productive things.

So I suppose my advice would only be that you aren't nearly as alone as you think you are. Keep a good balance of naam and bani. Make sure you don't forget that all the outter things we do are only useful if we're still progressing on the inner journey. Life is easier when we approach it with light-heartedness. Just like the problems and major crises of a toddler seem funny to us now, many of our present problems will appear the same way when we've progressed and certainly appear that way to Guru Sahib. I don' t think I have anything more to add except good luck and my best wishes.