Please Please Please Help

[Guest _lost_]

wjkkwjkf

first off i would like to say i dont even feel worthy saying fateh

i am an amritdhari sikh (dont really consider myself amritdhari anymore) and i was with a girl who said she wanted to marry me. we did things because we assumed we were getting married. we use to talk everyday and meet up all the time. and now she left me for sumone else, saying shes in love wit him. i am at a complete lose without her and am doing things that r unlike me. i am not doing my nitnem because whenever i do i jus think of her because i think of her all day. i do ardas all the time but i still feel the same. id ont feel worthy of guru sahib because i am so after maya. i kno i need to go for pesh but im jus gona end up doing the same things. i feel i need her but i kno i really need guru sahib. i try reading bani n doing ardas but i again i dont feel worthy and my concentration is else where. sumbody please help me.

Mod note: There have been numerous topics on this subject, so you should do a search. However since you have tried to make the effort yourself, by doing ardas etc, and you are seeking sangats advice, your topic is still up for discussion.

[Tarrandeep Kaur]

Hmmm firstly, you need to get this girl out of your head; reality check-this girl left you, she said she loves someone else. Why would you want to be with her. Actualy theres not much point on even trying to explain things, because the mind is so stubborn, when it wants something it wont want to know anything else. You are right, going pesh, although it maybe necessary- its not a quick fix solution. You have made this mistake, and its going to be tough now, but ultimately its your battle. See how much dedication you have to mahraj and your sikhi. Keep doing everything your doing; ardas and nitnem. Even if your mind wanders dont stop doing baani, it will only help you. Theres not much else to say, you know the answer, you know what you need to do.

Gurfateh jee

[Akaali]

This topic has come up so many times. I would suggest reading the gurbani vichaar section, along with these topics:

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showtopic=26211

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showtopic=25099

http://www.sikhsangat.com/lofiversion/index.php/t21353.html

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showto...mp;#entry213159

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showtopic=3762

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showtopic=36710

Besides that listen to katha on love. Hope that helps.

[curious_man]

_lost_ ... i don't know whre u frm and the suggestion i am giving would be feasible or not!!

but.. if u really want to get rid of those thoughts.. then take off couple of months frm home.. and go to some taksaal and do seva thre!!

or if u r frm toronto.. u can go to BhagatJi Jaswant Singh Ji(Daudhar).. he is doing some massive seva...

stay with some Mahapurush... if u r in company of such great souls... in india.. or canada or uk... then everything will be wiped out in couple of months!!

again.. its not that easy.. to take a leave frm daily routine

[xHarinder_singh]

pyare vee _lost_

Having a break off from a relation and that too a serious relation where u intended to get married can be very very very tough mentally. Its something that will remain in ur head 24 hours. Its a serious pain. I can understand what u are going through.

Many people suffer from serious depression or even commit suicide in such situations.

but u are lucky that can take the sharan of house of Guru Nanak Dev Jee.

I have had friends in the past who really got serious after girls, and after the girl went, they were like dead and completely broken.

Now what u need to do is the following:

1. DONT STAY ALONE. If u stay alone, ur mind will keep on thinking about what happened.

2. Dont tell ur problem to everybody. People cant understand what u are going through.

3. Try to remain in Gurdwara or a place where kirtan is done. The vibration of that place will give peace to ur mind.

4. READ AS MUCH BANI AS U CAN. Thats the real medicine.

5. These days amritdharis have also become worldly and selfish. So telling them about ur problems might not be the solution.

But, if u r lucky and u can meet a gurmukh who can understand ur suffering, instead of giving u lecture, that can be really great. Such a sangat can turn ur life upside down but such sangat is really less in this ghor kaliyug.

[Guest la di da]

wjkkwjkf

first off i would like to say i dont even feel worthy saying fateh

i am an amritdhari sikh (dont really consider myself amritdhari anymore) and i was with a girl who said she wanted to marry me. we did things because we assumed we were getting married. we use to talk everyday and meet up all the time. and now she left me for sumone else, saying shes in love wit him. i am at a complete lose without her and am doing things that r unlike me. i am not doing my nitnem because whenever i do i jus think of her because i think of her all day. i do ardas all the time but i still feel the same. id ont feel worthy of guru sahib because i am so after maya. i kno i need to go for pesh but im jus gona end up doing the same things. i feel i need her but i kno i really need guru sahib. i try reading bani n doing ardas but i again i dont feel worthy and my concentration is else where. sumbody please help me.

Mod note: There have been numerous topics on this subject, so you should do a search. However since you have tried to make the effort yourself, by doing ardas etc, and you are seeking sangats advice, your topic is still up for discussion.

:o You sound like me !!! :o

I forgot to say, except the part where you guys did things

[Anonymous_kaur]

wjkkwjkf

first off i would like to say i dont even feel worthy saying fateh

i am an amritdhari sikh (dont really consider myself amritdhari anymore) and i was with a girl who said she wanted to marry me. we did things because we assumed we were getting married. we use to talk everyday and meet up all the time. and now she left me for sumone else, saying shes in love wit him. i am at a complete lose without her and am doing things that r unlike me. i am not doing my nitnem because whenever i do i jus think of her because i think of her all day. i do ardas all the time but i still feel the same. id ont feel worthy of guru sahib because i am so after maya. i kno i need to go for pesh but im jus gona end up doing the same things. i feel i need her but i kno i really need guru sahib. i try reading bani n doing ardas but i again i dont feel worthy and my concentration is else where. sumbody please help me.

Mod note: There have been numerous topics on this subject, so you should do a search. However since you have tried to make the effort yourself, by doing ardas etc, and you are seeking sangats advice, your topic is still up for discussion.

:o You sound like me !!! :o

I forgot to say, except the part where you guys did things

:rolleyes:

[Papi]

Wat a pointless post by anonymous_kaur. If you are not going to help, why bother posting !!!

Play of karma is very complicated to understand, I would say give it time, and trust guru sahib to make sense of the whole episode for you. Keep doing what you are doing :TH:

[Anonymous_kaur]

ahhhh ^^

ok well ere..i have summat to say :D

_lost_ veerjiee

i suggest you do paath more often, we humans get ourselves engrossed with many worldrly things and therfore our focus on gurbanni tends to decrease..happens wiv mee..buh at the end of the day..i knw dat da only realtionship dats gunna last foreva..n eva..is da realtionship with guru jii...soo i recommend you get yourself engaged in other sikhi related activities..it will take ur mind of thingss :D

attend a rehnsabiiyeee

^^ dats wt most ppl do..n listen to more kirtan :D

i hope dat not a pointless post <_<

[sherlsurj]

Hmmm firstly, you need to get this girl out of your head;

tarandeep kaur..........thats kinda hard to do. i was in a serious relationship b4 i took amrit and its not easy getting over. its taking me over 2 and a half years and still sumtimes i break down. ok original poster u need to give urself time. just take things easy and dnt put pressure on urself. things will work out. i didnt think things wud work out 4 me. but slowly im getting better. but it takes time. i wudnt wish this pain on ne1 and all i can say is just accept it. life doesnt make sense sumtimes........but just have faith in god and everythin will be just alllllllllllllllllllright!