Bibia And Engagement Rings.

[Guest dkjfgcfjh]

Most Amritdhari Singhnia do not wear engagement rings, wedding rings or even jewellery and I agree with this viewpoint. In Gursikhi, if we are living according to Gurmat, there is no reason for us to embellish ourselves with jewellery or other such material possessions. Instead, we should embellish ourselves with the Lords name.

I am creating this topic with a question to the Sangat, after speaking to someone very recently. Say there is a dastaar wearing bibi, who (through no fault of her own) receives a lot of male attention and is often approached by men. So this means in the workplace, when she is out and about etc. She wears 100% modest clothing and behaves in a completely respectable manner. Would it be acceptable to wear a simple engagement/wedding ring to deter men from approaching her, as most will not bother once they see she is married? This ring would not be worn to show off how beautiful it is, or for any other such materialistic/vain reasons. (I'd also like to add that yes, hankaar could potentially come from this, but isn't that the case with anything?)

I'd really appreciate some feedback, as until very recently, I was completely against the idea of wedding rings but in this case it seems prudent to make an exception.

To any bhajis here who are married: would you feel more comfortable/reassured with your wife wearing a wedding band if she was/is in this situation?

So my question is: can wearing a simple ring be justified under these circumstances?

Thank you in advance for any responses.

[Guest Guest]

There is a Punjabi custom of wearing Wedding Choora or bangle.

Purpose of wearing, simply to make a Public Statement that girl's married or No Longer Available or Off-the-wedding market.

Now as you wear a Dastaar so i will assume only Sikh's or Punjabi's are interested.

In that case, better you wear a Choora, something which they can understand without any DOUBT :D

Another option is to wear printed T-shirts saying "I am married" or "Mother of five".

[Guest lotls]

A true Sikh is one is able to wear gold without feeling any attachment towards it. The same way they are able to live in this world without feeling any attachment towards it.

For this, no justification is needed from others. The individual themselves must evaluate their true state of mind and decide.

The problem only arises when we are not true to ourselves and convince ourselves that we have self-control we don't possess, and therefore seek others approval.

Guru Ji knows all.

lotls

[VanHelsingh]

She should have an angry look on her face at all times, and be rude to everyone who speaks to her. That'll stop people from bothering her.

[Guest bibi]

She should have an angry look on her face at all times, and be rude to everyone who speaks to her. That'll stop people from bothering her.

Be rude and angry? Wow! I am sorry but part of the reason Sikhs get picked on is this. That is why at times we get hated because people don't understand us. Rude and angry, just brings hate. Maybe she is nice to everyone and always smiling because she wants to portray sikhs in a good light?

I know for a fact when I wear my dastar in the mornings, I remind myself to be the best person I can be. I make an extra effort to hold doors for others, help the elderly, be polite to all and etc. because thats not me I am representing in my dastar, its my guru, His Sikhi. I am sorry I just don't see my Guru being rude and angry to others.

As for the ring matter, it is best to explain nicely your not interested and if they still question than take a minute to explain why as a Sikh you don't do that. I don't say explain it first because the other person might not be interested in learning about Sikh and your explanation will just sound like lecture. The ring itself is helpful because it might deter people from even asking at all or looking at you in that way. It doesn't work on all, I know. But maybe on a few? IDK Sangat knows better than me and Waheguru Ji knows best

[dalsingh101]

She should have an angry look on her face at all times, and be rude to everyone who speaks to her. That'll stop people from bothering her.

I think he was joking folks.....

Mind you I know plenty of Panjabans like this. Old and young.

[VanHelsingh]

I think he was joking folks.....

Mind you I know plenty of Panjabans like this. Old and young.

I was joking.....:D

[Guest G.Kaur]

To the original poster: the best thing you can do is to follow the Hukam given to you by the Panj Piare regarding jewellery.

[Guest dkjfgcfjh]

Thank you for all of your replies, I shall pass on your advice.

I would just like to reiterate this is not my personal situation (not that it makes a difference as I am anonymous).

Thanks again.

[Amarjodh Singh]