Marriage

[Kaur2000]

Hi guys,

I m very new to this site, but I think its good to discuss different kind of topics. I was actually reading the topic about a boy and girl from same village getting married and so on, and thought that i might get some help for my friend on this site. The question is that is it allowed in sikh culture that a girl marries her cousin brothers wifes cousin? Or isn`t that allowed?

[Singh, Mahan]

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As I understand, according to traditions and cultural norms, it is not considered appropriate .

However, reverse is clearly allowed – that is, a boy is allowed to marry girl cousin of cousin brother’s wife.

This may have something to do with genetic permutation / combination to prevent genetic inbreeding. This has been very successful in preventing genetic problems (defects) among Hindus and Sikhs, despite that the marriages were confined to much smaller areas for centuries.

(The type of relationships that your posts mentioned has been going on in some Middle Eastern countries, where some of the regions are having genetic problems {defects} because of that)

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[Balait_da_Sher]

The question is that is it allowed in sikh culture that a girl marries her cousin brothers wifes cousin? Or isn`t that allowed?

That is no different than the girl marrying cousin brother's wife's brother. Therefore it is fine.

[MokhamSingh]

Khalsa Ji

The Mukti Nama of Tenth Patshahi states that a Gursikh must refrain from marrying into two surnames. Dadhke (Father's) and Nankeh (Mother's). Any other restrictions will be based on tradition and personal belief.

[Kaur2000]

Thank u so much for sharing ur views, do any of u know if such marriages has taken place any where? what can the reason for partens saying no to such marriage be? i mean they r not related. I do understand if they had been cousins, but there r no blood relation in these cases...

[chatanga]

The question is that is it allowed in sikh culture that a girl marries her cousin brothers wifes cousin? Or isn`t that allowed?

In our culture, and you can ask your parents about this, is that from any house where you have taken a daughter in law, you never send a daughter(to become a daughter in law).

This event has happened in my own family, and it drove a wedge between 2 families who have broken all ties with one another.

[Kaur2000]

Is there any special reason for that? I mean it isn`t any blood relation and it is a distance family i mean they girl / boy r not theire real sister / brother, they r cousins...

[Singhstah]

Some of these traditions are so senseless and backwards. As far as I am aware nowhere has Guru Sahib promoted this kind of thinking. Its really only man made punjabi culture, not God's law. Really I mean if there's no blood relation there is absolutely no good reason for such a prohibition.

[Kaur2000]

I totally agree. I mean i just heard that such marriage is allowed if a boy from the grooms side marry his bhabis sisters / cousin sisters, but why isn`t it possible for the girl to do the same. As far as i know the gurus gave men and women equal rights, and I have never heard of such rule before. I mean the cast is the same, religion is the same and no blood realtions, then what makes it impossible? and plz again if anyone of u have a example where such event has taken place plz let me know. Thank u

[SevadaarEKhalsa]

I totally agree. I mean i just heard that such marriage is allowed if a boy from the grooms side marry his bhabis sisters / cousin sisters, but why isn`t it possible for the girl to do the same. As far as i know the gurus gave men and women equal rights, and I have never heard of such rule before. I mean the cast is the same, religion is the same and no blood realtions, then what makes it impossible? and plz again if anyone of u have a example where such event has taken place plz let me know. Thank u

I don't see why women aren't allowed to do that. Both men and women can marry anyone who is not blood related. Older generations abstained from marrying in fathers, mothers and both grandparents last name.

(Only exception in this are some Khatris who do intermarry with blood relations.)