Marriage

[Guest lost]

Gurfateh ji.

I need some advice. I'm at marriageable age.

Relatives and friends are on the look out.

I know dating is out of the question, but I was just wondering suppose you tried to find your own potential partner, as in get to know each other by talking, going out on small trips etc.

Wouldn't we be doing the sane thing anyway if somebody suggests a potential marriage partner?

As long as there is no bf gf relationship going on and developing, if it's all kept neutral is it ok to sort of keep a look out for your self too?

So for example if I was to see someone and if i thought to myself I would like to get to know them. If we started to meet and get to know each other, we both decide we would like to get married, we tell an elderly gursikh, is this acceptable?

Please give me some advice.

Thankyou.

[innergear]

Get a vacholan 4 help this is traditional way .

[Guest Guest]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

Talking about marriage,

first thing that comes to mind is Reputation and Character of the girl.

So if you decide to go out, date and talk to guys before anything is formalized,

it's RISKY.

You know all the aunty ji's out there and their favourite pass time, Gossip !

Plus punjabi parents don't like taking Risk when it comes to Marriage.

Anyways it all depends on parents and their Outlook whether modern or traditional.

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

[Guest nuts]

Truely agree with innergear & guest. It isn't that safe to take the plunge all by yourself. Share your concerns with your parents/elders if you do decide to see any prospective partner. If you can sis, respect time, have faith in our guru and things shall fall in place

[Guest nuts]

One more thing sis, one realizes too late that our Guru is samrath. I try to keep that in mind every time i think why some things happened as regards marriage (although am pretty much in the same boat as u) with me. But its too good a feeling when u sing gurbani and come across the virtues of our Gurus and tell urself that every things just fine & when the time's right it will happen.

I also learning though its' way beyond me to understand the plays of our guru

But then again he only gets us going ain't it

[m4ndy]

Everything in life is a risk... it's all about thinking in your mind what you feel is the right thing to do.. Finding your own partner is risky as you wouldn't know that persons intentions or what might happen especially if you are seen with the person and it gets back to your family that would look like you were hiding and keeping lies.. I would suggest you talk to your family about this and ask their permission to find your own potential partner if you don't want to go through te traditional route. However also be sure that the person you find their family know about it.

I'm not saying that finding your own partner is out of the question but traditional ways are much safer as families know best so in terms of that sense they might know about the family background, what kind of people they are.. Some families allow 'modern' ways others simply prefer traditional..

Be careful though if you choose the method of finding your partner be sure not to fall into any traps.. hey everything is in gods hands

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

[Guest Guest]

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

Is British Sikh Society ready to go the American way ?

http://www.gursikhspeedmeeting.com/

Waheguru ji ka khalsa

Waheguru ji ki fateh

[Guest OP]

Thank you for your replies and thoughts.

I thought the same at first but couldn't help and think 'what if'.

Oh I forget to mention as well that I'm amrithdaree.

[DustOfTheSaintsFeet]

"Everything in life is a risk"

Everything in life is hukam i.e God's will.

If you are to get married, you will, if it is written that you will be killed tomorrow, then that will happen.

Gurbani says death can come knocking at any moment so be ready for it. We all procrastinate with attachment to worldly affairs, but gurbani needs to be applied 24/7.

Gurbani is simple, God has no image, no form, he is nirboah and nirvair, he discovered truth after many ages of discovery, now he is truth 24/7.

We just need to discover what he did and merge with him, taht we are truly nothing and that all within the 6 senses are false.