Advice Needed With Folded Hands

[Guest Singha]

the 2nd guy easily.

as per siree raag:

nIcw AMdir nIc jwiq nIcI hU Aiq nIcu ] nwnku iqn kY sMig swiQ vifAw isau ikAw rIs ]

neechaa andhar neech jaath neechee hoo ath neech | naanak thin kai sang saath vaddiaa sio kiaa rees |

Nanak seeks the company of the lowest of the low class, the very lowest of the low. Why should he try to compete with the great?

ijQY nIc smwlIAin iqQY ndir qyrI bKsIs ]4]3]

jithai neech samaaleean thithai nadhar thaeree bakhasees |4|3|

In that place where the lowly are cared for-there, the Blessings of Your Glance of Grace rain down. ||4||3||

for me that says it all.....

if the rich guy was full of gursikh qualities, then he would be well balanced.

but the "poorer" guy is more on it as a singh.

it also depends on how on board/serious you are about gursikhi jeevan and gursikhi, and how much u want to be a jeevan valli singhni, that gives birth to the soormeh of the next generation..

or just another singhni living a happy life..(nothing bad with either of then... just depends on ur take on what sikhi is about and how serious u r about it, and muktee)

hope that helps bhen.

[simran345]

Bhenji if it was me, i would go for the 2nd singh, no offence to the first, but money moh, mayaa is not everything. One can work up to those things, he has a job, 1 roti khat kahunge dusrea nalo fir ki hoya? u dont want to end up havin lots of arguments and no santokh, happiness in ur married life just for money. i know one needs money to survive and a secure partner, but i married with my partner havin nothin and those things can be worked to,thats wat marriage is all about. ik dusre da saath dukh sukh ch dena..

[Wales85]

#1. Life is hard, life in poverty is harder. It seems like #1 would be better able to support you and your family, and when money is not available the stress in a marriage goes through the roof. Even if your husband is a saint, without the ability to provide for you and your children things can always go down hill very fast.

[Guest aka]

I personally think that coming to a youth forum is not the best place to get advice. Most people here are not married and will give answers based purely on emotion (the worst advice i have seen is the person who said to make parchees and pick one randomly). Why would you make a life decision by basically flipping a coin? Worst advice I have ever heard.

You need to really think about this, and don't jump into anything quickly. Take your time, and really analyze the situation and get to know the person you are going to marry. Thats all i can say.

[Guest me]

If i have a daughter then i will seriously hope that she pick #1. Just as Wales said that life is hard and we should take our rossy coloured glasses off when making such huge life decision. There is nothing wrong in number 1 as he is what he is and after marriage he may lean towards more gursikhi.

Many people change dramatically soon after marriage, so consider that in mind when thinking about number 2.

- married singh

[Only five]

If i have a daughter then i will seriously hope that she pick #1. Just as Wales said that life is hard and we should take our rossy coloured glasses off when making such huge life decision. There is nothing wrong in number 1 as he is what he is and after marriage he may lean towards more gursikhi.

Many people change dramatically soon after marriage, so consider that in mind when thinking about number 2.

- married singh

Once Satguru Sri Guru Nanak Dev ji Maharaj went to a village and observed the village. To this village he said may you always stay and live in this village and never leave. Then he went to a different town and Satguru told this village people that may they all get split up all over the world. The people were confused and didn't understand why to the good people Satguru said may you get split up all over the world from their families. Satguru then explained that, those that are good, they can help others and help themselves. The town that was bad he didn't want to go all over the world because they would spread their negativity and bad ways to the world.

Guess where wales85 and the above quoted poster would fit in

Being wealthy does not solve any problems. I'm speaking from experience. It has only brought more pain to my life since it takes me away from doing bhagti. Money comes and goes very fast. A life of SIkhi only comes once and we will never know when we will get the next chance.

[Wales85]

I forgot that Guru Nanak Dev Ji preached asceticism. :blink2:

[Guest ...]

I would go with the person who has better character and Gursikh Jeevan. If that person can just about make ends meet financially (and not falling into debt) then they are a good partner.

If your potential partner #1 is talking to you in a Kaami way already and that isn't a big red flag to you to avoid him, may be that is the type of partner you want and you should leave #2 chardikala Singh for a more moral chardikala Singhni

In reality these days, money, social status, etc, probably much more so than any genuine Gurmat factors, but may be that explains why so many Amritdharis these days end up cheating or get divorces a few years down the line.