Is This Correct ?

[Guest Mean]

waheguru g ka khalsa,,, waheguru g ki fateh!!!!

i am a 17 yr old amritdharee girl ..... Is it ryt to have a relationship at this age ????? relationship in the sense ,,, chatting just like friends ,, sharing feelings for each other ... Its pure ,, no kind of lust ...

Is this ryt for us ????

i think m driving off my path !!!! m i ???

We have decided that we shall marry when we grow up .... i know that our planning is worth less ,,, everything is preplanned by waheguru g ...

m confused ... :blush2:

wat to do ????

[Mehtab Singh]

Focus on your education, play sports and study Gurbani. If you still have time then learn keertan or Gatka. Get a professional degree and a professional job, and then get married to a Singh appropriate for you. Its upto you whether you want your parents to find you one. Forget about this relationship garbage. You are just 17, a dangerous age, so best to focus on studies for now and get good grades. Having a boyfriend is something non-Amritdharis do, you said you are Amritdhari, so you can't get into this stuff. I know initially it all may seem pure, but at your age it doesn't take too long to turn impure.

padhaayi ch dhiyaan de putt...agge jaake mundeyaan di koi ghaat ni rehni fer...saari umer kari jaayi chatting ohne sammne bithhaake

[singher23]

Nothing wrong with having a friend of the opposite gender...but what you are describing sounds like more than just a friend

[Guest RavindaSingh]

This isnt the kind of thing an amritdhari does.....just get on with your life share your feelings with Gurujee and innocent talking now could lead to a bad path later bhanji stop it before u regret it !

Peace

[Guest Mean]

waheguru g ,,,,

thank u so much .... i thought the same but was confused .. but now i know whats correct and what to do !!!!

thanku thanku all ....

[Guest Confused :/]

Fateh,

I feel like im in the same boat as you phenji... Difference is well firstly im 18 and secondly me the guy are together. Im not amrit dhari but really want to be. Ive been with him for nearly two years now and well weve never ever wanted other "things". He respects me and helps me in sikhi. I came from a really bad past and he helped out of it. I dont know if being with him is right though. Like we treat each other like best friends. Totally confused, can i have a little bit of advice please?

Fateh

[Guest inSearch]

Please avoid this at all costs...you've asked for advice and thats good...just stay away from that kinda thing...you cannot decide so many years before about who you want to marry and even if you do its quite possible that it may not happen and you dont want to regret anything...a relationship between a boy and a girl should be of a brother and sister...if anything its likely to go wrong big time and its not worth losing your sikhi and becoming behmukh from guru jee...

just concentrate on your sikhi and forget marriage because when your ready to marry, it will happen when its going to and to whoever, leave it all to Vaheguru Jee.

[jpsingh2]

Either follow your heart 100% (which I recommend) or listen to what others tell you.

Our parents or grandparents usually got married at about 18 so if you plan to get married dont feel ashamed just be worried about the obvious ie money etc,

Keeping things on the down low is usually not a bad card but be sure to keep all your real values no matter what.

[Mehtab Singh]

Fateh,

I feel like im in the same boat as you phenji... Difference is well firstly im 18 and secondly me the guy are together. Im not amrit dhari but really want to be. Ive been with him for nearly two years now and well weve never ever wanted other "things". He respects me and helps me in sikhi. I came from a really bad past and he helped out of it. I dont know if being with him is right though. Like we treat each other like best friends. Totally confused, can i have a little bit of advice please?

Fateh

Not that I know you or the guy you are talking about, but this is a daily feature in today's times. A girl is having a rough phase in life, a guy helps her out, next thing is that they are dating. Maybe its natural, maybe the guy took advantage of her vulnerability, only God knows. Best for you is to look upon his emotional support as Gurujee's own kirpa to get you out of whatever rough phase you were in before. Appreciate it as a gift and move on. Don't stick to the gift, rather thank the One who blessed you with it. This doesn't mean you cut off ties with the guy who helped you out, but be sure to draw firm lines where you should, and not just for him but for yourself as well. Make it very clear to him if you feel he is trying to take your friendship to "the next level". Or if you think he is the right guy for you, tell your parents (or atleast your mother), and have him tell his folks. Let the elders talk and decide what happens next, so that both of you don't waste your time and youth after each other meaninglessly.

And I repeat, focus on your education, get good grades first and then a good job. Once you have a degree and a good job, and you are in your early 20s, then you have plenty of time to think and decide what kind of man you want. THEN if you still feel that this guy is the best, go for it. At that point, your parents will respect your decision as well.

[Guest Confused :/]

Fateh

Thanks everyone for the comments back, especially for following my heart cas thats what i have to do

Also Gurujee has been giving me hukamnamas the past few days and well given me my answer!

Thanks again

Fateh guys :)