Pesh

[Guest Yoda Man]

I intended to be pesh soon. Tell me what I should say to the five beloved. Here is the situation. I am in depression. I was once accused that I was having relations with someone without any evidence. A person who does have extra relations will not act like I did. I did whatever I could do to not to break the relationship. In confusion I left home twice. All I wanted from my x was a simple way of becoming better GurSikhs. I was so much in depression, I tried everything from Guru Jee's point. I was weak I started to go to some people you go and see, and give them money. This is something against Sikhi. For 2.5 I went there and wasted my money, time. Everytime I would go there I was always scared and when I left I would slap myself for going there. Then something out of the blue I got connected with someone who pulled me out of this mess. It has been over 3 years since I have gone to the unsual place. In the past 3 years so many things have happened. I eventually seperated and divorce and married this person who helped me to get out of the gutter I was in. In the past 3 years I have lost everything. I am still going through hardships because the person I met is not what I would call a healthy person. This person also goes through depression. People kept saying not so nice things about this person. People around tried to convince me the person is bad including this person's mother. I went to see this person in 2010 and I was okay with this person. Then in 2012 I got married. I don't know what to call it weather it is a marriage or an Anand Karj. Because mother did not like me. We were taken to a Gurdwara and did a mime Anand Karj or marriage. This was a place where there were no ragis no sangat just both of us and the person's relatives who were fine with me and this person. We did 2 peharas. Because there was no kirtan, the pala shabad was playing in my head. When we did 2 rounds the Lava shabads were playing in my head. The court was not going to accept this so we went to another Gurdwara. There was a ragi jatha a shabad was sang but not lavas. There was sangat so this marriage was performed to please the courts to register our marriage. There was no such thing as the first night or any form of physical contact. I had to go my way and they had to go there way. Soon I am sure this person I married will join me. I am confused to call this person my Dharam x. As soon as I went to see this person in 2012 we went to Amritsar and had our Bana sewed. I was not able to go to Darbar Sahib due to security reasons. What would I say to the 5 piaras.

[immortal57]

that is seriously one of the most confusing things i have ever read

[Guest Yoga Singh]

I did at least 4 to 5 saaj paaths and did lots of kirtan before I went to this foreign country. Things for me are very confusing. At this time I do not who I am. Further more in 2010 the mother took me to a policeman tried to convince me to lay charges against the person I married for taking money from me and purchasing a house. Mother tried to convince me by showing a picture that was suppossed to be the person I married's picture. When I saw those picture my mind went blank. It seemed to me I was blinded perhaps by Guru Jee. When I confronted my current spouse. The person just cried and said things that related to my life. Thinking I was found and that these are not my real parents. The spouses crying convinced that this person is a true person. I wonderend my the mother never took me to the house mom claims hers. The only power that understands this is Guru Jee.

[S4NGH]

Waheguru...

Veerji take it easy. The panj pyare have ample experience of all this. Take your time and explain, get it all off your chest.

2ndly, hope you do lots and lots of naam simran. The medicine that works!

[Guest Yoga Singh]

Speaking of naam simran. I only took 2 things from my previous family, it was the Vaja and the tabla. Sometimes I sit around and do nothing then all of the sudden I feel like doing Paath, Or doing Kirtan for hours. Once I start I can not stop except when my legs get so tired. Once I did Asa Kee War for 3 hours. Kirtan and tabla was blessed by Guru Jee. Not some Kirtiania or a Tabla Master. At work I always listen to Akand Keertan. So there is lots of singling along and simran that comes into my mind or mouth. Sometimes even in my dreams I hear kirtan done by some purtan Gursikhs ex: Giani Amolak SIngh or Bhai Jeewan Singh and some current kirtianas.

[singher23]

......wut?

[Guest]

This is confusing as hell.

[simran345]

Yoga Singh tusi fikar na karo, tension baut le rehe hai. Maharaj ji ageh ardas karo, tada vishwas una ch hai. Confusion hatjani jad tusi dhian nal apne mann nu samjayuge jo hogea so hogea. Atheet lang chuki, usnu badal nai sakde, par aunee wale sameh da kuch kar sakde. Parents and partner jo tade wife hai eho jehian takleefa da mukabla krna auka hunda jad dhono paseo kich rehe hove.

Tade wife nu medical professional help di lorh ho skdi jis tra tusi dasde. Doctors di help leo je twanu eho jehi gal lag rehi.

Tusi kirtan sunde kamthe vadia hai, te jo supne ch aunde fikar na karo.

Mann nu relax karke tande dimak nal socho te koshish karo kise nal gak krn di is bareh. Panj piarea nal gal karo te ap na mann te bauj rako je doctor te jao help le. Kise pakhandia kol jan di lohr v nai, apne paise barbaad na karo, kise ne twadia takleefa, mushkila dhur nai karnia. Kade insaan di zindagi ch eho jea waqt aunde jad asi sochde kuch tek nai ho reha. Ki pata Waheguru sanu koi hor maade waqt tho bachaa rehe. Apna bharosa sache paatsha te rako te keho jo kuch krna tusi krna, tu hi tu.

Mann kio bairaag hovega, Satgur mera poora. . .