Help - Anger and Hate I have it

[Guest Improver]

I have alot of hate and anger for some people i know, not based on religion/politics or anything its personal,

Im my my mind when i think of them i am spewing hoping for the worst for the at times, after i calm down i know this wrong and dont want anything to happen.

when these people come to mind or when i see them what should i do, or is there a paath i can do to get rid of this hate anger and arrogance.

[Guest scali]

You are not the mind. You are a spiritual being having a human experience. Most people think what comes into the mind they are THAT. When this becomes overwhelming. Sit with your eye closed and watch your mind. You can observe the mind nonsense and after a while it slows down. Do it often you will realize this it what makes us miserable, Obeying our minds. You are much bigger than that. It will take time to detach you from your mind. Daily keeping still and watching your thoughts will slow them down. And slowly pick up NAAM SIMRAN .Be patient. They will slowly leave you its an illusion. Also sincere Aardas to GURU sahibs .

[SunSingh 286]

Gurbani tells us that we are responsible for what happens to us. This means that if someone is spreading hate against us, it is b/c we did something to them in past janams. So we are reaping the rewards of our own sown seeds. This doesn't mean that you have to be passive, you can defend yourself. But often it is better to ignore them and let their slander destroy the paaps on your head. It will make the path easier for you. I find remembering following sloks to be very helpful if I get upset:

PrIdw jy qU Akil lqIPu kwly ilKu n lyK ]
Fareed, if you have a keen understanding,
then do not write black marks against anyone else.
AwpnVy igrIvwn mih isru nˆØIvW kir dyKu ] 6 ]
Look underneath your own collar instead. (6)

PrIdw jo qY mwrin mukIAW iqn@w n mwry GuMim ]

Fareed, do not turn around and strike those who strike you with their fists.
AwpnVY Gir jweIAY pYr iqn@w dy cuMim ] 7 ]
Kiss their feet, and return to your own home. (7)

PrIdw QIau pvwhI dBu ] jy sWeI loVih sBu ]
Fareed, become the grass on the path,
if you long for the Lord of all.
ieku iCjih ibAw lqwVIAih ]
One will cut you down, and another will trample you underfoot;
qW sweI dY dir vwVIAih ] 16 ]
then, you shall enter the Court of the Lord. (16)

If you long for revenge, remember we reap what we sow:

PrIdw loVY dwK ibjaurIAW ikkir bIjY jtu ]
Fareed, the farmer plants acacia trees, and wishes for grapes.
hMFY auNn kqwiedw pYDw loVY ptu ] 23 ]
He is spinning wool, but he wishes to wear silk. (23)

[Gurpreet14 318]

Gurbani tells us that we are responsible for what happens to us. This means that if someone is spreading hate against us, it is b/c we did something to them in past janams. So we are reaping the rewards of our own sown seeds. This doesn't mean that you have to be passive, you can defend yourself. But often it is better to ignore them and let their slander destroy the paaps on your head. It will make the path easier for you. I find remembering following sloks to be very helpful if I get upset:

PrIdw jy qU Akil lqIPu kwly ilKu n lyK ]

Fareed, if you have a keen understanding,

then do not write black marks against anyone else.

AwpnVy igrIvwn mih isru nˆØIvW kir dyKu ] 6 ]

Look underneath your own collar instead. (6)

PrIdw jo qY mwrin mukIAW iqn@w n mwry GuMim ]

Fareed, do not turn around and strike those who strike you with their fists.

AwpnVY Gir jweIAY pYr iqn@w dy cuMim ] 7 ]

Kiss their feet, and return to your own home. (7)

PrIdw QIau pvwhI dBu ] jy sWeI loVih sBu ]

Fareed, become the grass on the path,

if you long for the Lord of all.

ieku iCjih ibAw lqwVIAih ]

One will cut you down, and another will trample you underfoot;

qW sweI dY dir vwVIAih ] 16 ]

then, you shall enter the Court of the Lord. (16)

If you long for revenge, remember we reap what we sow:

PrIdw loVY dwK ibjaurIAW ikkir bIjY jtu ]

Fareed, the farmer plants acacia trees, and wishes for grapes.

hMFY auNn kqwiedw pYDw loVY ptu ] 23 ]

He is spinning wool, but he wishes to wear silk. (23)

PrIdw jo qY mwrin mukIAW iqn@w n mwry GuMim ]

Fareed, do not turn around and strike those who strike you with their fists.

AwpnVY Gir jweIAY pYr iqn@w dy cuMim ] 7 ]

Kiss their feet, and return to your own home. (7)---------------------------- If u r wrong touch the feet.... But if not... Strike hard... :strong:

[Raaj.Karega.Khalsa 278]

One can do paath of the salok from Sukhmani Saheb to overcome the five thieves:

Salok

Kaam Krodh Ar Lobh Moh Binas Jaae Ahanmev ll

Naanak Prabh Sarnaagti Kar Prasaad Gurdev ll

There have been some hard times in life when certain people have caused me a lot of trouble.

Obviously, after I was repeatedly hurt, the love and respect was replaced by hatred and anger. Every time I thought about those people, the memories of hurt and anguish came rushing to my mind.

This continued even after I had broken any ties with them.

After a while I noticed that I'm allowing these memories to take control over me because they control my mind and thus the emotions. Anger and hatred gave me nothing but headaches.

Now I know what to do about it.

When I feel anything negative about someone, I do not let any thoughts about them (or any situation related to them) come into my mind. I simply BLOCK THE THOUGHTS. I continue to do this until I can not only think, but also talk about them without any feeling of contempt or hatred in my mind.

The above method described in bold, works well for me.

BUT I'm not very sure about when I meet the person face to face...coz I'm still actively blocking any thoughts about them....So I'm never sure about what I'm feeling at that moment.....

[Gurpreet14 318]

Well i myself is very short tempered girl....

Whenever something happened which made me angry - i did alot... i drank water.... i walked somewhere else... i diverted topic etc.. but that anger was still prevailing... Hate was there... n untill n unless i do not release it .... i was not satisfied....

This made my life bad.. but on the same side... i am good with many so people actually dont leave me after facing my anger as well.......

I searched on net y this happened n is there anywayy... to cool down... n den i came to know the fact that ... there is some other problem with person becoming angry....

i noticed whenever i become angry my body temperature rises... body becomes hot... eyes lil red... senses stop working.. heartbeat fastens...n heart says.... say it.. do it...

then few months back i had taken amrit.. i thought regularity in doing path willl help me... but nothing was working.... months passed on n iwas same....

then one day i just noticed if i am able to cool down n maintain my body temperature.... then i can control anger....

doing simran.. waheguru waheguru makes u relax... n when u become cool ur body will use sense n u will not react badly with the person u hate...

The onky remedy is..... by any means.. maintain ur body balance..... today also i do release my anger... if that person was wrong.... but i use my senses.. i dont hurt people now much.. but i do make them realize where were they wrong.. n how they make us feel bad....

Use senses.... maintain ur body temperature.... :D

[gurdeepsinghjohal 275]

One can do paath of the salok from Sukhmani Saheb to overcome the five thieves:

Salok

Kaam Krodh Ar Lobh Moh Binas Jaae Ahanmev ll

Naanak Prabh Sarnaagti Kar Prasaad Gurdev ll

Like a mantar? I am confused. No offence please.

Below one works far much better for me.

When I feel anything negative about someone, I do not let any thoughts about them (or any situation related to them) come into my mind. I simply BLOCK THE THOUGHTS. I continue to do this until I can not only think, but also talk about them without any feeling of contempt or hatred in my mind.

The above method described in bold, works well for me.

BUT I'm not very sure about when I meet the person face to face...coz I'm still actively blocking any thoughts about them....So I'm never sure about what I'm feeling at that moment....

[DoubleEdge 7]

Look into Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. It is very effective at dissolving emotional charges. The more free you are of the extreme emotional reactions (or distractions), the more likely it is that you will be able to focus on your journey.

[Raaj.Karega.Khalsa 278]

Like a mantar? I am confused. No offence please.

Hanji bhaji,

If you read Sri Ameer Bhandaar, (which is a teeka of SGGS ji by Bhai Mani Singh ji taksaal, Satto Gali) they've explained that Gurbani can be used as not only a mantar (Basic e.g. Mool-mantar, Gur-mantar, Beej-mantar etc)...but Jantar and Tantar (tantra) as well!

And they've explained a few bits about Gurbani's Jantra usage as well. Very Interesting!

Also, I think you've confused the 'mantar' to only being related to Hinduism. I might be wrong though....

[gurdeepsinghjohal 275]

point taken