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Guest P.s.k

young dumb and Sikh + beard question...

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Guest P.s.k

Hi, I have a few questions and opinions I would like to get off my chest, wondering whether anybody could offer some answers and opinions.

 

Firstly,

Is there a difference between tying up ur beard (with gel) and trimming? Is tying up your beard allowed as per rehat? 

Im a young kesh Dhari Singh and I have a crippling fear of regret, I have never cut my kesh and I know I will regret it if I trim, but I also feel like when I'm old I will regret it if I don't, I kinda just want to make the mistake and atleast experience what it feels like to be an average 20 year old for once, I was very immersed in sikhi when I was a young teen and i don't know why but I have slowly drifted away a little,( maybe because the regret of not doing anything normal as a teenanger got to me.).. I don't wanna let go of sikhi or dissapointed my parents. but at the same time I don't wanna be 60 years old and feel like I missed out on epic experiences during my youth all because I was too scared to dissapointed my parents, When I'm 60 I don't think anyone will care that I had a trimmed beard for a coupe years while  was young right? And there have been people worse off who mahraj has forgiven, so why not me if I did it? 

Also, the more general question I have is, Is it better to be fully in sikhi or fully out? I feel like a bit of a fraud or a fake Sikh , sometimes when I practice sikhi, because I also do things which mahraj wouldn't be proud of ..I'm stuck in two worlds and sometimes I think it's pointless to do both at the same time but other times I think it's necessary to do the good while I'm doing the bad do I can balance out the bad karma with the good 😭(it makes sense in my head anyway)  and to keep the discipline, because I knwo some things I do are bad and by forcing myself to keep my kesh I feel like it reminds me that I'm Sinning and that I will need to stop doing Those bad things at some point in life, for example I do things like partying, having s*x, Hav bad sangat, but at the same time I also do good things like listen to Kirtan, do paat ( japji sahib and rehraas atleast) do naam, go to gurdwara , don't smoke or drink, and I also have good sangat who I hang out with too. (But my good sangat doesnt  mix with my bad sangat, and I feel like 2 completely different people depending on the group I'm with) 

i already know that sikhi is the truth and  i know that shaheed singhs would be turning in their graves seeing this (and me), right now, sikhi is the only thing that will matter to me in the end, and I promise myself I will be a devout guriskh in a few years (with mahrajs kirpa), but it's kinda like I wanna procrastinate a bit Yano ? Like you know the traditional sentiment of inspirational people telling you to "go out into the world and try different things until u find your passion"...well I feel like because I  was already born with sikhi, finding the truth (sikhi)was way to easy... I kinda wanna try some other stuff so I can know for sure myself that sikhi is the truth, I kinda just wanna live my young years a little and then once I'm abit older and I've had my fun then get back ont sikhi 100%..what do you guys think? 

Im really sorry if I have offended anyone, I know some of you may be reading this in disgust right now but I would really like to hear what you guys think, and start a discussion here because surely I'm not the only one who thinks like this or has ever thought this? And if u don't understand my point of view and want to be angry, please express yourself as clearly and constructively as possible, because I know if I read this like 5 years ago I would be so p*ssed off or just think the op was dumb! But That just goes to show how much our thought process can change...

 

Thanks for reading 

 

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Guest Gupat

No problem to tie your beard. Especially as it gets longer, it looks so smart tied up.

Sikhi is about a very unique divine experience. This is why God himself made Sikhi through 10 gurus and gurbani - it’s so divine only God himself could create it. All this ‘rehat’ is important but was intended (in part) to make sure Sikhs maintain a dignified, respectable and spiritual identity in the world. Alot of rehat is also generally beneficial anyway, like iron kara helps immune system strength, kanga helps balance electricity in body.

God tests us in many ways before letting us experience his divine presence within us. Because nothing is more special or valuable. We should try focus our energy on 1 god (ikonkar). When energy flows to various chakars in body it has to manifest because this is natural. With practice and blessings when we focus more and more on higher energy points within us slowly it manifests into such steady unbreakable bliss that everything gets left far behind. Focusing on waheguru and gurbani is an uplifting thing. This is because it is a truth that the gurbani and waheguru shabad is already residing deep within each cell of your being. That’s why all this path simran is about awakening or connecting back to what you have and always had; a direct link to all-powerful god within yourself.

Am similar age to you and in very similar situation, hence this is just my feelings/what I tell myself. I hope it may help bro 🙏🏼

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Guest Jatt and Juliet

will be a devout guriskh in a few years (with mahrajs kirpa), but it's kinda like I wanna procrastinate a bit Yano ? 

Answer one question, can you predict how long you have left in earth? 

Nothing wrong with tying beard but don't do it for the sake of having fun. I used to tie my beard but started questioning why and eventually stopped. Unless it's required for a specific role like surgery or working with machinery then I personally would not try and please the world.

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13 hours ago, Guest P.s.k said:

Hi, I have a few questions and opinions I would like to get off my chest, wondering whether anybody could offer some answers and opinions.

 

Firstly,

Is there a difference between tying up ur beard (with gel) and trimming? Is tying up your beard allowed as per rehat? 

Im a young kesh Dhari Singh and I have a crippling fear of regret, I have never cut my kesh and I know I will regret it if I trim, but I also feel like when I'm old I will regret it if I don't, I kinda just want to make the mistake and atleast experience what it feels like to be an average 20 year old for once, I was very immersed in sikhi when I was a young teen and i don't know why but I have slowly drifted away a little,( maybe because the regret of not doing anything normal as a teenanger got to me.).. I don't wanna let go of sikhi or dissapointed my parents. but at the same time I don't wanna be 60 years old and feel like I missed out on epic experiences during my youth all because I was too scared to dissapointed my parents, When I'm 60 I don't think anyone will care that I had a trimmed beard for a coupe years while  was young right? And there have been people worse off who mahraj has forgiven, so why not me if I did it? 

Also, the more general question I have is, Is it better to be fully in sikhi or fully out? I feel like a bit of a fraud or a fake Sikh , sometimes when I practice sikhi, because I also do things which mahraj wouldn't be proud of ..I'm stuck in two worlds and sometimes I think it's pointless to do both at the same time but other times I think it's necessary to do the good while I'm doing the bad do I can balance out the bad karma with the good 😭(it makes sense in my head anyway)  and to keep the discipline, because I knwo some things I do are bad and by forcing myself to keep my kesh I feel like it reminds me that I'm Sinning and that I will need to stop doing Those bad things at some point in life, for example I do things like partying, having s*x, Hav bad sangat, but at the same time I also do good things like listen to Kirtan, do paat ( japji sahib and rehraas atleast) do naam, go to gurdwara , don't smoke or drink, and I also have good sangat who I hang out with too. (But my good sangat doesnt  mix with my bad sangat, and I feel like 2 completely different people depending on the group I'm with) 

i already know that sikhi is the truth and  i know that shaheed singhs would be turning in their graves seeing this (and me), right now, sikhi is the only thing that will matter to me in the end, and I promise myself I will be a devout guriskh in a few years (with mahrajs kirpa), but it's kinda like I wanna procrastinate a bit Yano ? Like you know the traditional sentiment of inspirational people telling you to "go out into the world and try different things until u find your passion"...well I feel like because I  was already born with sikhi, finding the truth (sikhi)was way to easy... I kinda wanna try some other stuff so I can know for sure myself that sikhi is the truth, I kinda just wanna live my young years a little and then once I'm abit older and I've had my fun then get back ont sikhi 100%..what do you guys think? 

Im really sorry if I have offended anyone, I know some of you may be reading this in disgust right now but I would really like to hear what you guys think, and start a discussion here because surely I'm not the only one who thinks like this or has ever thought this? And if u don't understand my point of view and want to be angry, please express yourself as clearly and constructively as possible, because I know if I read this like 5 years ago I would be so p*ssed off or just think the op was dumb! But That just goes to show how much our thought process can change...

 

Thanks for reading 

 

bro

what is normal for a teenager to do ?

partying, boozing, bedding girls , getting heart smashed up, head messed up ?

that stuff is OVERRATED ...

sleeping around will not find you the kind of girl you want to share a lifetime with...

boozing and drugs will not make you popular

following the crowd makes you part of the flock i.e. a sheep

develop your own self, build character/depth, work on your fitness (body strength) , work on your knowledge bank , do sewa make it about becoming the best version of yourself , you are unique  why destroy that to fit into fickle people's crowds ? Yeah it is hard sometimes but is anything worth doing, easy?

being complete and welldeveloped  you will attract other positive people ...and life will improve remember a friend isn't someone who gives you a like , it's someone who meets your mind and has your back ..those are rare creatures .

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15 hours ago, Guest P.s.k said:

m really sorry if I have offended anyone, I know some of you may be reading this in disgust right now but I would really like to hear what you guys think, and start a discussion here because surely I'm not the only one who thinks like this or has ever thought this? And if u don't understand my point of view and want to be angry, please express yourself as clearly and constructively as possible, because I know if I read this like 5 years ago I would be so p*ssed off or just think the op was dumb! But That just goes to show how much our thought process can change...

Stay away from alcohol and drugs,.once addicted its hard to leave them alone. They take over ur life. They let u have fun and pleasure while doing nothing. Staring into space. This messes up ur motivation, reward system.

Girls. Same thing. U will end up with alot of relationship baggage and drama. Plus u will get used having another person around. This makes it hard to enjoy ur own company or loneliness. 

The more fun, pleasurable things u do. The more ur mind will get used to them and u will be looking for the next high.it will make u unfulfilled, depressed and addicted. 

So its better to be simple. Theres pleasure in small things. Going to movies, hanging out with family, good food. Nature etc.

If you really want happiness and fun. Ge it from doing fun, pleasurable things. The greatest sense of happiness comes feom accomplishing hard things. So go travel the world, join a sport, go skydiving, learn a skill and become auccessful at it, build ur body, learn to meditate, accomplish things. Volunteer, maybe go woth khalsa aid. Learn to cook.

You want to spend ur youth doing things for which u wont have time or strength for later. Life is gonna get busy soon. So go make memories that u would want to tell ur grandchildren. Like climbing mt everest. Or winning mma competitions. 

Also now is the best time to get good in sikhi.  To be fully in it. Later on when u have a jib and kids. Ur life will be the same as everybody else. So take the time now to attend camps, do abhiyaas 10 japji sahibs daily and hours of samadhi. Attend rainsbhais, they are the best. 

Ur idea abt procrastinating now and getting into sikhi would be good IF u could be sure of the time u have left. But noone know when they will die. So the best way to live life is as if u were gonna die tommorow. So live it with full passion. Go have fun and do sikhi at the same time. Do both with full passion and enthusiasm as if its ur last day. 

Idk wat type of fun u cant have as a sikh. Only the type thats riddled with diseases and harm: drugs and dating. 

Fashion, u can do as a sikh. Check out street singh guy. And go have some real fun where u actually do interesting things.

Have a bucket list with fun,.dangerous, cool.things. and do it. Like drag racing, ATV dune riding. Shooting AK-47. Visiting a war zone. Having a video go viral. 

 

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16 hours ago, Guest P.s.k said:

Hi, I have a few questions and opinions I would like to get off my chest, wondering whether anybody could offer some answers and opinions.

 

Firstly,

Is there a difference between tying up ur beard (with gel) and trimming? Is tying up your beard allowed as per rehat? 

Im a young kesh Dhari Singh and I have a crippling fear of regret, I have never cut my kesh and I know I will regret it if I trim, but I also feel like when I'm old I will regret it if I don't, I kinda just want to make the mistake and atleast experience what it feels like to be an average 20 year old for once, I was very immersed in sikhi when I was a young teen and i don't know why but I have slowly drifted away a little,( maybe because the regret of not doing anything normal as a teenanger got to me.).. I don't wanna let go of sikhi or dissapointed my parents. but at the same time I don't wanna be 60 years old and feel like I missed out on epic experiences during my youth all because I was too scared to dissapointed my parents, When I'm 60 I don't think anyone will care that I had a trimmed beard for a coupe years while  was young right? And there have been people worse off who mahraj has forgiven, so why not me if I did it? 

Also, the more general question I have is, Is it better to be fully in sikhi or fully out? I feel like a bit of a fraud or a fake Sikh , sometimes when I practice sikhi, because I also do things which mahraj wouldn't be proud of ..I'm stuck in two worlds and sometimes I think it's pointless to do both at the same time but other times I think it's necessary to do the good while I'm doing the bad do I can balance out the bad karma with the good 😭(it makes sense in my head anyway)  and to keep the discipline, because I knwo some things I do are bad and by forcing myself to keep my kesh I feel like it reminds me that I'm Sinning and that I will need to stop doing Those bad things at some point in life, for example I do things like partying, having s*x, Hav bad sangat, but at the same time I also do good things like listen to Kirtan, do paat ( japji sahib and rehraas atleast) do naam, go to gurdwara , don't smoke or drink, and I also have good sangat who I hang out with too. (But my good sangat doesnt  mix with my bad sangat, and I feel like 2 completely different people depending on the group I'm with) 

i already know that sikhi is the truth and  i know that shaheed singhs would be turning in their graves seeing this (and me), right now, sikhi is the only thing that will matter to me in the end, and I promise myself I will be a devout guriskh in a few years (with mahrajs kirpa), but it's kinda like I wanna procrastinate a bit Yano ? Like you know the traditional sentiment of inspirational people telling you to "go out into the world and try different things until u find your passion"...well I feel like because I  was already born with sikhi, finding the truth (sikhi)was way to easy... I kinda wanna try some other stuff so I can know for sure myself that sikhi is the truth, I kinda just wanna live my young years a little and then once I'm abit older and I've had my fun then get back ont sikhi 100%..what do you guys think? 

Im really sorry if I have offended anyone, I know some of you may be reading this in disgust right now but I would really like to hear what you guys think, and start a discussion here because surely I'm not the only one who thinks like this or has ever thought this? And if u don't understand my point of view and want to be angry, please express yourself as clearly and constructively as possible, because I know if I read this like 5 years ago I would be so p*ssed off or just think the op was dumb! But That just goes to show how much our thought process can change...

 

Thanks for reading 

 

The Shaheed Singh would not be wanting to kill you. They would want you back. Remember you are like a brother to them.

And the thing is many People have walked down the route you are highlighting with just bad stuff and all of them say it was empty. If you let go of Sikhi now you may never be wanting to go back into it. So keep it near and be fully into it. It's like running a marathon and you have already ran a bit of it no point no point in stopping.

As for tying your beard. I'm not too sure on that but it is a billion times better than trimming it because your beard is apart of your Kesh.

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On 9/25/2018 at 1:13 AM, Guest P.s.k said:

Hi, I have a few questions and opinions I would like to get off my chest, wondering whether anybody could offer some answers and opinions.

 

Firstly,

Is there a difference between tying up ur beard (with gel) and trimming? Is tying up your beard allowed as per rehat? 

Im a young kesh Dhari Singh and I have a crippling fear of regret, I have never cut my kesh and I know I will regret it if I trim, but I also feel like when I'm old I will regret it if I don't, I kinda just want to make the mistake and atleast experience what it feels like to be an average 20 year old for once, I was very immersed in sikhi when I was a young teen and i don't know why but I have slowly drifted away a little,( maybe because the regret of not doing anything normal as a teenanger got to me.).. I don't wanna let go of sikhi or dissapointed my parents. but at the same time I don't wanna be 60 years old and feel like I missed out on epic experiences during my youth all because I was too scared to dissapointed my parents, When I'm 60 I don't think anyone will care that I had a trimmed beard for a coupe years while  was young right? And there have been people worse off who mahraj has forgiven, so why not me if I did it? 

Also, the more general question I have is, Is it better to be fully in sikhi or fully out? I feel like a bit of a fraud or a fake Sikh , sometimes when I practice sikhi, because I also do things which mahraj wouldn't be proud of ..I'm stuck in two worlds and sometimes I think it's pointless to do both at the same time but other times I think it's necessary to do the good while I'm doing the bad do I can balance out the bad karma with the good 😭(it makes sense in my head anyway)  and to keep the discipline, because I knwo some things I do are bad and by forcing myself to keep my kesh I feel like it reminds me that I'm Sinning and that I will need to stop doing Those bad things at some point in life, for example I do things like partying, having s*x, Hav bad sangat, but at the same time I also do good things like listen to Kirtan, do paat ( japji sahib and rehraas atleast) do naam, go to gurdwara , don't smoke or drink, and I also have good sangat who I hang out with too. (But my good sangat doesnt  mix with my bad sangat, and I feel like 2 completely different people depending on the group I'm with) 

i already know that sikhi is the truth and  i know that shaheed singhs would be turning in their graves seeing this (and me), right now, sikhi is the only thing that will matter to me in the end, and I promise myself I will be a devout guriskh in a few years (with mahrajs kirpa), but it's kinda like I wanna procrastinate a bit Yano ? Like you know the traditional sentiment of inspirational people telling you to "go out into the world and try different things until u find your passion"...well I feel like because I  was already born with sikhi, finding the truth (sikhi)was way to easy... I kinda wanna try some other stuff so I can know for sure myself that sikhi is the truth, I kinda just wanna live my young years a little and then once I'm abit older and I've had my fun then get back ont sikhi 100%..what do you guys think? 

Im really sorry if I have offended anyone, I know some of you may be reading this in disgust right now but I would really like to hear what you guys think, and start a discussion here because surely I'm not the only one who thinks like this or has ever thought this? And if u don't understand my point of view and want to be angry, please express yourself as clearly and constructively as possible, because I know if I read this like 5 years ago I would be so p*ssed off or just think the op was dumb! But That just goes to show how much our thought process can change...

 

Thanks for reading 

 

do you expect the sikhs to read all of this, and have time for your questions?

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Guest P.s.k
3 hours ago, mahandulai said:

do you expect the sikhs to read all of this, and have time for your questions?

lol did I title this post  "I beg you to pls answer my question" ? 

 

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Guest P.s.k
On 9/25/2018 at 5:19 PM, RajKaregaKhalsa1 said:

The Shaheed Singh would not be wanting to kill you. They would want you back. Remember you are like a brother to them.

And the thing is many People have walked down the route you are highlighting with just bad stuff and all of them say it was empty. If you let go of Sikhi now you may never be wanting to go back into it. So keep it near and be fully into it. It's like running a marathon and you have already ran a bit of it no point no point in stopping.

As for tying your beard. I'm not too sure on that but it is a billion times better than trimming it because your beard is apart of your Kesh.

Thanks for your input, I hear what your saying , as for 'the route I highlighted being empty',  I agree with you in that I know it will not be the thing that makes me happy in the long run, but for now I feel like it will, don't we all do things as well as sikhi in or lives that we know will not make us happy like sikhi will, but we pursue them anyway? Whether it be goin go to the gym, or earning lots of money eor practicing a skill that has no relation to sikhi etc, What's the difference between those things and what I'm doing? 

 

 

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I am not an expert but the purpose of being human is to remember Waheguru ji as much as possible. In your post above you clearly mention about how you know this won't help you in the long run. I would say cover your head and do an Ardas from you heart and Guru will come to help you.

As for your question:

The difference between earning money, gym etc. And parties is that when your at a party your Kaam (lust) krodh (anger) Lobh (greed) Moh (attachement) and Hankaar (pride) are more active and these take you away from Waheguru ji. It is harder to keep connected with love for Waheguru. Think about it music is blasting into your ears and it could be some rubbish about women etc.

And when your at the gym or at work you could have your headphones in listening to Kirtan etc. Although on the surface there is not much link between Sikhi and gym etc we need to try our hardest to link them together.

This video may help with trying to link Sikhi into everything you do in your life.

Guru is saying you can get ultimate bliss from Waheguru so why don't we take it?

I am a bit of a hypocrite because I am not an amazing Sikh myself but forgive me for all the mistakes I have made.

ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂ ਜੀ ਕਾ ਖਾਲਸਾ ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂ ਜੀ ਕੀ ਫਤਿਹ

 

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15 minutes ago, RajKaregaKhalsa1 said:

I am not an expert but the purpose of being human is to remember Waheguru ji as much as possible. In your post above you clearly mention about how you know this won't help you in the long run. I would say cover your head and do an Ardas from you heart and Guru will come to help you.

As for your question:

The difference between earning money, gym etc. And parties is that when your at a party your Kaam (lust) krodh (anger) Lobh (greed) Moh (attachement) and Hankaar (pride) are more active and these take you away from Waheguru ji. It is harder to keep connected with love for Waheguru. Think about it music is blasting into your ears and it could be some rubbish about women etc.

And when your at the gym or at work you could have your headphones in listening to Kirtan etc. Although on the surface there is not much link between Sikhi and gym etc we need to try our hardest to link them together.

This video may help with trying to link Sikhi into everything you do in your life.

Guru is saying you can get ultimate bliss from Waheguru so why don't we take it?

I am a bit of a hypocrite because I am not an amazing Sikh myself but forgive me for all the mistakes I have made.

ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂ ਜੀ ਕਾ ਖਾਲਸਾ ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂ ਜੀ ਕੀ ਫਤਿਹ

 

I fully agree with this post, couldn't have put it better myself...

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Did you just compare partying and sleeping around to going to the gym Lol 

Well guru ji tells us that every action we take we must face it's consequences too, so are you prepared to face the consequences ? And its not a small thing that your are asking for is it? You are asking if its ok for you to turn your back to Sikhi.

What makes you think you will come back? Your struggling to break away from that life style now so what makes you think it will be easy to break away from it and turn to sikhi in the future? I have cousins in their 30s and 40s who still mess around with alcohol, women, weed etc    all of this feels good and is pleasurable so why would you break away from it once your involved in it? 

And you really should stop the sex. That's a major sin in sikhi. How will you face guru ji? In Tankhanama guru gobind singh ji tells bhai nand lal that even if one looks wrongly at a female then he loses respect which his daughter may endow. Your not just looking but are doing more than that. How would you like it that you find your daughter doing the exact same things that your doing with those girls ? 

When sisters and mothers come to the congregation,

ਭਾਈ ਨੰਦ ਲਾਲ ਜੀ : ਤਨਖ਼ਾਹ ਨਾਮਾ ਪੰ. ੪੫ 

ਦ੍ਰ੍ਰਸਿ਼ਟ ਬੁਰੀ ਦੇਖੈ ਤਸਿ ਪੰਗਤ ॥ (੧੮)

Drrasiaṭ burī dēkhai tasi paṅgat ॥ (18)

One who casts an evil eye at their row,(18)

ਭਾਈ ਨੰਦ ਲਾਲ ਜੀ : ਤਨਖ਼ਾਹ ਨਾਮਾ ਪੰ. ੪੬ 

ਸਿਖ ਹੋਇ ਜੋ ਕਰਤ ਕਰੋਧ

Sikh hōi jō karat karōdh

And being a Sikh, if he renders wrath,

ਭਾਈ ਨੰਦ ਲਾਲ ਜੀ : ਤਨਖ਼ਾਹ ਨਾਮਾ ਪੰ. ੪੭ 

ਕੰ ਨਿਆ ਮੂਲ ਨਾ ਦੇਵੇ ਸੋਧ ॥ (੧੯)

Kan niā mūl nā dēvē sōdh ॥ (19)

(He) loses the respect which a daughter could endow.(19).

So it's your choice brother! Everything we do has consequences/karma   are you willing to face that? 

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