IS.............

[curious_man]

very true ji <_<

but whtever it is ...i feel if a person does simran and nitnem daily with heart ..guru ji aape sab theek kar dende haan!!!

thts just wht i said b4 in my previous post!!!

[Gupt daasan daas]

when did sant je say to go please ure wife

any proof?

i never heard this before

kaam is not a wway to show ure love

its an act of kaam

u cant try to put any twist u want on it, the truth is the truth

kaam, in any form, is very hurtful to u

even if with ure wife

it stelas ure bhagthi and takes u away fromt he wonders of naam

we dont realise the wonders of naam

there is nothing like it

conteception is wrong

causde we only have relations to reproduce, not for pakhandi kaami pleasures

unless all kaam is gone from ure mind, we will not get a seat in sach khand

sant kartaar isngh je clearly says

only one who has FULL control over hismind can go into sach khand

this aint a easy thing like people thing

i remeber i heard in katha once,m i think it was alkso posted here

this age of kaljug is like a forest fire

no animal can escape it

cept one special one a deer

and only this blessed animal is fast enough to go into the water and save itself fromt he fire

the fire is kkaljug and kaam krodh lobh moh hankaar

maya, the great illusion whihc hold mankind away from its creator

the cure, the water, is naam, and guru je hukam, his prema bhagthi

only that an save us int he dark age of kaljug

bhula chuka maf

[Princess]

Kaam(Lust) does NOT equal Love

You have love for your wife/husband

showing/expressing your love does not equal lust

therefore it is ok to express love

Bhul Chuk Maaf <_<

[Gupt daasan daas]

and who says thts love?

thats not love

thartrs called kaam bhenji

like i said, we can put any type of spin on it

kaam is literally sexual desire

until we conquer this, we wil not be able to conque our mind

this is a great illuuision,t he illusion of maya

we know wat kaam means

we cant change the maning to exlude marrige

there can be kaam in mamrrige as well

we always have to be careful

in chrisitan sence, fine , u can do it as much as u want in marrige

but sikhi isnt christianity

the western sence of love is not wat guru je told us

ure ultimate preeth is withvaheguru je

cause ure wiife husband wil not go wit u after u die

only naam will

and our preeth shud be with vaheguru je, that shdu be our greatest preeth, but u shud also give ure family a lot of pyaar due to their ure family, u got a speical bondz

but if anything takes us away from vaheguru je then thartr is mayas work

we wil not reach vaheguru je if we cant control kaam

i know its hard, but we must fight it

bhula chuka maf

[Princess]

and who says thts love?

thats not love

thartrs called kaam bhenji

like i said, we can put any type of spin on it

kaam is literally sexual desire

until we conquer this, we wil not be able to conque our mind

this is a great illuuision,t he illusion of maya

we know wat kaam means

we cant change the maning to exlude marrige

there can be kaam in mamrrige as well

we always have to be careful

in chrisitan sence, fine , u can do it as much as u want in marrige

but sikhi isnt christianity

the western sence of love is not wat guru je told us

ure ultimate preeth is withvaheguru je

cause ure wiife husband wil not go wit u after u die

only naam will

and our preeth shud be with vaheguru je, that shdu be our greatest preeth, but u shud also give ure family a lot of pyaar due to their ure family, u got a speical bondz

but if anything takes us away from vaheguru je then thartr is mayas work

we wil not reach vaheguru je if we cant control kaam

i know its hard, but we must fight it

bhula chuka maf

92957[/snapback]

So when u have kids, don't show them affection

that might be coonsidered lobh, attacthement <_<

gimme a break

its a natural human thing

i wuzn;t comparing sikhi to christianity so duno where u got that from

giving ur wife/husband love isnt taking u away from guru ji veerji

it all depends on how u look at it

if u look at it as kaam towards someone then that's what it will be

but if u look at it as loving your significant other (who is supposed to be, according to Guru Ji, the same soul as us *two bodies one soul*) then that's what it will be

If we don;t learn to love and accept ourselves then how can we love Guru Ji

making love is just another way to show love (*only between a husband and wife*)

[Gupt daasan daas]

ok bhenji, vaheguru je

btw i wasnt saying dont love ure partner

i was saying any preeth that wilk talke u away from vaheguru je is maya, so interourse, kaam is maya

but behnji im an <banned word filter activated>, i have no gian, i shund tbe one to talk

if u really wanna find out the answers, then just do ure bhagthi

but if u really want to meet vaheguru je,w ith all ure heart, even intercourse in a minimum must be kept to ablsolute minimum, ony for reproduction

but its ure choice

depends on how badly u wanna meet vaheguru jeeven sant baba nand singh je thge maximum a married couple shud have intercourse if neccesary is once a year to a guy

but thas for people who have higher avastha

a gursikh completly absorbed in akaal will not want to have intercourse

he will shw affection to his wife in other ways, the real ways, not through the khell of maya

when baab nand singh je kept on decreasing the time ause the said theres not way, i have to much kaam, i need to do it mrore than once a year, than finally after he cudnt even control kaam for a week babaje said u arnt a truee sikh of guru nanakd de je, ure too absorbed in kaam

ure choice, showing love to anyone is ok as long as that preeth will not take u away from vaheguru je

if a husband thinks about his wife every second, he is onvoled in chootee preeth( false -preeth)

that takes him into moh

we shud be comepletly detacched even while living int he middle of kaljug

all preeth is good as long it doesnt interfere with vaheguru je

and kaam is invloved with intercourse, no matter wat ure reason is

do a sceintific study on that even, its been done, kaam is for sure involved

kaam is like a theif

it comes and plunders ure amrit

and guru je says these fools DONT EVEN KNOW THEIR AMRIT IS BEING PLUNDERED

be careful, maya is the tricky illusion, very powerfful

but ure choice, im no one, the only real wa to find the answer is walking the marag of prema bhagthi, im maha moorkh

satnam vaheguru je

bhula chuka maf

[*PO$H_ Da_PO$HY*]

Kaam(Lust) does NOT equal Love 

You have love for your wife/husband

showing/expressing your love does not equal lust

therefore it is ok to express love 

Bhul Chuk Maaf :wub:

92954[/snapback]

totally agree on that <_<

[The Khalsa Fauj]

Aapni itree sou rat hoo-ee par naari dhee phain bkhaanay

Make as much love with your wife as you want but treat other women as sisters and daughters.

[Guest Akaal108]

There should be niyam and understanding between couples who are in the path of prema bhakti.

Sex drive after marriage is not a problem at all..it's quite expected who are newly married but as time goes that sex drive has to reduce in order to get full laha of amrit ras and naam ras.

so have this kinda principle who want to get some where in sikhi.

- Before 30 have sex once a week

- Before 35 have twice a month (I am assuming in this phase parents are get into responsibliy of raising kids so sex drive goes down anyway)

- Before 40 have once every 3 months

- At 45- 50 as sex drive goes down automatically.. gursikh should not take pills such as vaigara..there is a reason during that time sex drive goes down.. so that you can naam jap fully 24 hrs because ant kal(Death) is coming.. ant kaal can come anytime but usually in this materialstic world people who go over 45 they start thinkin of getting life insurance etc.

so please be wise ..grisht jevan is there so that you can reproduce and together you can reach god as one atma but two bodies.. don't be foolish to spend all your life into kaam.

From my understanding-

Sex is *Not* Kaam but form of Love.

Love is scarifice , compassionate, kindness, caring first ... you can also express love via intercourse (Sex).

Kaam is level when one person who goes blind in sex as in addict or person become slave to it

keep in moderation as wise people say- Expereince it, master it but do not become slave to it :e:

[Shaheed]

and who says thts love?

thats not love

thartrs called kaam bhenji

like i said, we can put any type of spin on it

kaam is literally sexual desire

until we conquer this, we wil not be able to conque our mind

this is a great illuuision,t he illusion of maya

we know wat kaam means

we cant change the maning to exlude marrige

there can be kaam in mamrrige as well

we always have to be careful

in chrisitan sence, fine , u can do it as much as u want in marrige

but sikhi isnt christianity

the western sence of love is not wat guru je told us

ure ultimate preeth is withvaheguru je

cause ure wiife husband wil not go wit u after u die

only naam will

and our preeth shud be with vaheguru je, that shdu be our greatest preeth, but u shud also give ure family a lot of pyaar due to their ure family, u got a speical bondz

but if anything takes us away from vaheguru je then thartr is mayas work

we wil not reach vaheguru je if we cant control kaam

i know its hard, but we must fight it

bhula chuka maf

92957[/snapback]

So when u have kids, don't show them affection

that might be coonsidered lobh, attacthement

gimme a break

its a natural human thing

i wuzn;t comparing sikhi to christianity so duno where u got that from

giving ur wife/husband love isnt taking u away from guru ji veerji

it all depends on how u look at it

if u look at it as kaam towards someone then that's what it will be

but if u look at it as loving your significant other (who is supposed to be, according to Guru Ji, the same soul as us *two bodies one soul*) then that's what it will be

If we don;t learn to love and accept ourselves then how can we love Guru Ji

making love is just another way to show love (*only between a husband and wife*)

92962[/snapback]

i completly disagree with you princess, n Gupt Dasan Dass is on the right track.

Grist Jeevan:

Common Belief is:

Have a family dont run off to do bhagti, cuz u should have a family love your wife and kids and do bhagti at same time.

Real Idea is:

that you uphold Dharma, while you uphold your wordly duties. those include.

-have children to populate, and contrinbuting to the cycle of joons (rebirths)

- make the cheddar $$$ so your family can eat and live modestly

- AND DO BHAGTI, OF OUR LORD WAHEGURU.

look at my last point of bhagti, can you see a bhagat indulging in sex? no you cant , you see a bhagat spending all their time praying. but in grist jeeevan sikhs have to face the 5 chors HEAD ON!!!! that means have sex TO REPRODUCE, and

-not do kinky stuff with your wife or husband.-lust

-not trying to get that mansion, your family could use cuz its big-greed

-not tha new home renovations your neibours got-greed

-cry when your family member dies and moves on to guru sahib- attachment

- fight a guy, cuz he slapped your kid- anger

- think your living the best way and pity others cuz u got guru sahibs saroop at your house- ahankar

alll those are simple ways, that sum1 can easily fall to the 5 chors, but sikhs need to face them head on, we arent lil babies that become celebit to avoid this, or run away to the jungle to avoid this.....

now you may say " Shaheed ya dunno wat ya talkin bout, cuz for real sikhs got tonnz of bhagats who went to the forest n lived there lives alone n doin bhagti, n you should know that"

n its true i do know that, but to explain that theres a sakhi.......

yall know guru arjun dev ji who took shaheedi by gettin boiled alive, sat on a hot plate (thava), hot sand pourd on him, and then thrown in a river (where his body dissapeared)

alright so while he was on the hot plate he was doing paaht, and the magistrate of the area ordered him on to the plate, ppl were sad, watching this Saint of a man being tortured, the man did not cry, or scream, he sat quietly with a mala in hand doing paat.

there was another magistrate from the neighbouring region who had become friends with guru sahib his name i believe was Mir Shah. He was present while guru ji was on the thava. he cried out " Oh, good friend and lord, i have the power to stop this, please let me stop this injustice". Guru Sahib Opened his eye's and smiled at Mir Shah, n pointed up at the sky. Mir Looked up and saw thousands upon thousands of Angels in the sky alll crying, BEGGING guru sahib to allow them to stop his suffering, and rain down justice upon his captors.

Guru Sahib said to the angels and to Mir Shah " without such examples, the mere mortal would not know how to give sacrifise, so i shall give my self to thy"

the point of tha sakhi is, those few chosen ppl that do bhagti away from the world, are examples to us that with bhagti anything can happen.

the point of this sakhi is to show that bhagats, like guru sahib are sent here to set examples for us, so celebitism is alright in some cases.

i repeat we as sikhs need to face 5 chors head on, and not get tangled in maya. Sex with tha wife or husband, should be left to reproduction. we are humans however, and only a bhramgyani can control the 5 chors, so we can get caught in Kaam with our partner. but the point of anand karaj is that you help eachother out, so no doubt in my mind all my friends here on Sikhsangat, when your married, if u fall trap to any of these punj chors, youll remember that your DUTIES are to enrich the ppl you are responsible for.