Help

[palvinder88]

kekeke

[Balwinder Kaur]

Kaam attacks... hmm naam banee and simran is the BEST way for you to deal with this. Stay away from potential stimuli which could induce such thoughts in you...it's all about self-control. Remember tuks from bani about the deviousness and consequences of kaam...that should be a pretty good deterrent. Lastly, if you've read bhai rama singh jee's book, he mentions how those who gave in to kaam and indulged in illegal kaami stuff had their souls thrown into boiling water by jamdoots...think,do you want to subject your beautiful soul to such pain and torture?? To me, its not worth it...I'm sure you feel the same too. Our soul is a beauteous creation by Guru Sahib, don't destroy it for the sake of a moment of succumbing to the pervasive lure of kaam. Refer to this shabd...it answers your question about kaam straight to the point...what more can you ask for???

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=2322

Also refer to the sakhi about a raaja during Guru Hargobind Jee's time....how he overcame kaam. There's also lots of threads floating around with tips as to how kaam can be overcome....check them out. Also, feel free to check out Manjot Singh veerjee's article on kaam...it's pretty good...FIGHTING KAAM

[tegroop]

wjkk wjkf...sangat ji..let me be very truthfull n humble..with the dust of the sangats feed..i need to tell the truth...im a paapi..recenly..like about 3 or 4 months..my mind has gone away from sikhi..guru ji n anything to do with sikhi...my kaam feelings came back...i started watching porn.. n followed by jerking....im a  paaapi..i need help..i have tried so many methods...i dnt get anything ..it doesnt help me..i try n try every day....i need sangat ji to plz do kirpa on this morrakh...plz help me out of this kaam trap...i can only ask for help from the sanagt...wjkk wjkf..

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[Jaspaul Singh]

wow..

first off mad respect for u to come out like this .. but u still couldve kept it gupt in the gupt section .. still man your not the only guy there are many out there ..

i think the best is like bibi ji said naam bani .. but i know what you mean its hard..

since ur telling everyone here.. tell someone at home.. dat u have temptations to watch dat stuff on the internet.. and ask them to help you .. and so maybe they can assist you in keeping you busy or something, or you know what i mean .. UNLESS they are one of those typical punjabi parents that would give you a beating of a lifetime.. :wub: .. then i dont know you and you dont know me .. hahah..

but ya it doesnt have to be your parents.. can be anyone .. dat you know will help you and understand you .. your best friend .. ur brother.. cousin..

but above all that.. keep urself BUsy.. do stuff.. stay out of the house.. main thing .. stay away from being alone .. im assuming u watch it alone so dont be alone .. keep urself busy .. even if it means to study harder.. read more books.. heck watch more tv.. do something else.. chill wit friends .. its summer bro ..

but yaa .. these evils are hard to grasp wit guru jis kirpa.. ur asking one wit a major anger problem .. :wub: ..

hope dat helped..

[The Khalsa Fauj]

If you use msn. Please add me. I might be able to help you.

[tegroop]

Dear Palwinder

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

I would suggest that you to attend the kirtan programme that will be held from 24th of August till the 31st August. This kirtan programme is one week kirtan darbar starts from 7pm to 11.00pm everyday .

There will also be amrit vela simran sessions that not to be missed.

This programme is to be held in Tatt Khalsa Gurdwara and PJ Gurdwara.

PLs come down and to KL to attend this programmes perhaps if you need a place to stay pls let me know since you are from penang. i know its quite a distance.

You are always welcome to listen to kirtan and participate in sewa.

You need these doses.

take care

Gurfateh

[Pheena]

First of all stop condeming yourself to hell. Second relieve yourself of the guilt. Third take responsibility that you seek to change your ways.

"God helps those who help themselves"

Now understand your kaam thru giaan, thru wisdom of what sexuality is in its true form. Be aware that you are seeking the pleasures of the flesh and bones. Sant Singh ji Maskeen said once in a book, that "Sex is a part of the body not the mind."

In my undesrtanding so far is that When it becomes a part of the mind it is Sexuality. Which is Kaam. Sex is the natural course of reproduction, But Sexuality is a manifestation of Sex fueled by desire. Desire to experience the feeling of orgasm, of the other genders touch, smell, taste.... Desire then later manifests itself into Fantasy. When Fantasy is born, the mind is fully desiring the satisfaction of Sexual energy that itself has arisen. So the Mind itself creates teh Energy thru Fantasy then it wants to release the energy that it build up. So when did it ask YOU for permission? You simply fell under the spell of the mind following along thinking the mind knows what it is doing.

When one sees a girl walking, the first desire is to posses the flesh for your personal gratification. The ego boosts because of consuming the desire for flesh, the satisfaction that you were able to posses it, it even is a power struggle to be able to posses the flesh of another and consume it sexually for its own selfish purpose. You must understand the difference between Sexuality and Sex. Do not go into repressing this energy for it will only cause it to grow stronger.

What you need to realize is that the energy that arises when one is sexually aroused is unbiased, it is not Sexual in nature, it is neutral. it is we thru the power of thought that we direct this energy to our sexual organ. This energy is released thru our orgasm and thus the intense experience one feels. For some it can even become a spiritual in nature, but i won't get into that here.

Other have given great advice, do simran, do meditation it will divert this energy into better use. But along with simran you must also seek wisdom of what sexuality is. You must try to understand its source of why it arises. What purpose will it serve me after i have satisfied this urge of sex? Where will you be after you have consumed the desire? Will the desire vanish or will it arise again and again? In the end it is the desire that is the problem, not sexuality, your desire is the root cause for this sexuality. The sexuality is simply the manifestation of your desire in a different form. For some this desire manifests in greed of materials or of wealth or for power.

What you seek is Anand, bliss, but we look for it in the wrong place. i wrote this in a response to another post on another forum, i think you might find it useful.

I don't think sex is a bad thing, i said Sexuality is the problem. If Sex becomes your Desire, or it becomes your Want, or it becomes your Need. Sooner your thoughts will become Sexual in nature. Sexuality will be visible in your everyday life. For Sex you need a Partner. If you want to have Sex and that Partner is not Available? What then, Frustration? Anger? Those emotions signal the attachment one has with sex. The question is Why does one Desire, Want or Need Sex? Is it just the Satisfaction of the Desire to have Sex? After one has Sex what has he acheived? After Satisfying the Desire to have sex has the Desire been fullfilled? If it has been fullfilled for it to never rise again, then having Sex has become your liberation of the Desire. Then you can look at another Woman or Man without being Sexual, you can look at the Beauty of a Woman or a Man without Perversion. Satisfying the Desire, the Mind has the mind Received Satisfaction? Can the Mind receive Satisfaction? We have been having sex for countless lifetimes and yet again we stand at the same door step of the same desire. Has it been Fullfilled?

Wisdom my dear friend is your solution to this along with meditation ofcourse.

[palvinder88]

waheguroo

[gupt_paapi]

im no1 to say this.. but i no its hard and that. just try ur best in nam simran. if u dont no how 2 theres a link on this forum abt naam simran hwo 2 meditate..

Yeh abt kaam. Well feel ashamed of it. tell sum1 who respects u.. n see how they react. it soudsn harsh n dat.. but it works, coz den u ashamed of urself so much! and you'll slowly stop.

Its addictive.. because you let it! dont let ur hand near it. simple. i min try ur best not 2 do anyhrting physcially. just sit there n combat it in ur mind.. until its too late and u haf no time 2 do it... den ull start 2 get used to it. n maybe, ull stop geting the urge to do it too.

hope i hlped

[Mehtab Singh]

Some really good answers. Palvinder, dont worry, u r with the right people (on this forum). Best is to do ardas, and kaam maaran waale shabad (helped me): http://www.mkhalsa.com/lit/fightingkaam.html

all the best :TH: