In Despair

[Guest Guest]

vaheguroooooooo......man dhan guru dhan guru piario...proud to be singhni bhenji...i love u bless always!!

[Jo Kicch Hai So Tera Waheguru]

WJKK WJKF

Penjhi

I hope you are able to over come your ditress - do ardaas (read more bani) before guru sahib and with kirpa guru ji will take your pains away. I know you feel really bad but drifting away from you guru will only cause more pain. Simran, Sangat & Seva will keep you in chardi kala.

I hope the following shabad helps:

tofI mhlw 5 Gru 5 dupdy (716-1)

todee mehlaa 5 ghar 5 dupday

Todee, Fifth Mehl, Fifth House, Du-Padas:

<> siqgur pRswid ] (716-2)

ik-oNkaar satgur parsaad.

One Universal Creator God. By The Grace Of The True Guru:

AYso gunu myro pRB jI kIn ] (716-2, tofI, mÚ 5)

aiso gun mayro parabh jee keen.

Such is the blessing my God has bestowed upon me.

pMc doK Aru AhM rog ieh qn qy sgl dUir kIn ] rhwau ] (716-2, tofI, mÚ 5)

panch dokh ar ahaN rog ih tan tay sagal door keen. rahaa-o.

He has totally banished the five evils and the illness of egotism from my body. ||Pause||

bMDn qoir Coir ibiKAw qy gur ko sbdu myrY hIArY dIn ] (716-3, tofI, mÚ 5)

banDhan tor chhor bikhi-aa tay gur ko sabad mayrai hee-arai deen.

Breaking my bonds, and releasing me from vice and corruption, He has enshrined the Word of the Guru's Shabad within my heart.

rUpu AnrUpu moro kCu n bIcwirE pRym gihE moih hir rMg BIn ]1] (716-3, tofI, mÚ 5)

roop anroop moro kachh na beechaari-o paraym gahi-o mohi har rang bheen. ||1||

The Lord has not considered my beauty or ugliness; instead, He has held me with love. I am drenched with His Love. ||1||

pyiKE lwlnu pwt bIc Koey And icqw hrKy pqIn ] (716-4, tofI, mÚ 5)

paykhi-o laalan paat beech kho-ay anad chitaa harkhay pateen.

I behold my Beloved, now that the curtain has been torn away. My mind is happy, pleased and satisfied.

iqs hI ko igRhu soeI pRBu nwnk so Twkuru iqs hI ko DIn ]2]1]20] (716-5, tofI, mÚ 5)

tis hee ko garihu so-ee parabh naanak so thaakur tis hee ko Dheen. ||2||1||20||

My house is His; He is my God. Nanak is obedient to His Lord and Master. ||2||1||20||

Stay in chardikala :TH: :TH: :TH:

Bhul chuk maaf

[Guest Guest]

tabbo's 1st post is reasonable

[Guest _5INGH_]

Dear all,

Before you read this please do not just tar it with the same brush and say go and do a search on the subject, I really want you to try and understand my situation

I am 25 year old amritdhari woman and I am in despair over my facial hair, to set the record straight I would like to point out that it is not your ‘average’ amount of rom as in the soft hair that covers our bodies from head to toe, my facial hair is thick and coarse and ranges from 3-4cm the shortest to about 6-7 cm the longest. I have recently completed my masters degree at university with a good result and now I am looking for work after having several interviews I have been tuned down for posts and I put it down to the way I look. My parents are also distraught because I have had no marriage offers and they themselves don’t know where to start finding me a husband because of the way I look. It is a harsh reality but looks do affect the way people behave around us. I am so depressed and I hardly go out no more, maybe once every few days to the local Gurdwara but even then I don’t go when I know there will be a lot of sangat. I keep myself to myself and you can forget about socialising. I feel so hideous and hurt and I am so afraid. My parents have suggested I go to India to get married but I thought to myself that by going to India I am just going to end up marrying someone who is marrying me not for me but just for the sake of coming abroad.

I cannot wear a dastaar in fear of being mistaken for a man; once in the women’s changing quarters I heard a girl say to her friend “what’s he doing in here?”because she genuinely thought i was a man and it hurt so much, now you can sit there saying “bhenji be strong” but you just don’t know how hard it is!

I am so badly in despair that there are days that I contemplate giving everything up, I mean what is the point if all I am doing is being an extra pressure on my parents, I can’t get a job, I cant get a husband, what kind of future do I have? I am strict in other parts of my rehat with my daily banis and things, I have no problem with hair on my body as it is covered at all times, even my eyebrows are fine, it is just the hair on my chin and face at it’s worst ( if I can say that). I have had hormonal problems as I was going through puberty and my doc told me to go on the pill but after a while I stopped taking it as I learned it could have other side effects. I feel confused as to why I have to put up with it, I ask myself would my Guru want me to feel bad about myself but at the same time I know people are going to say God gave you that hair, and yes, yes He did, but did He want me to look grossly hideous and have such difficulties arise in life or did He also give me the free will to do something about it? Like if a woman was raped she would have the choice to abort the baby; or someone was disabled in such a way that by operation they could be better. I have learned why hair on the head, legs, and other body areas is important but why is the hair on a face of a woman important? If this question could be answered well it would make me think a few things over. For now I am seriously considering giving up, leaving home and moving away from my parents so as to not have them worry about me.

Can anyone please help?

And if all you are going to do is post guidelines from rehat maryadas and tell me to be strong then please don’t waste your time, they never covered the topic of “abnormal hair growth” in my amrit sanchaar so views on that would be better acknowledged

Thank you

147294[/snapback]

sis i feel for you I can understand the kind of pressure you are under... and I mite get critised for this but I believe you shud take off hair that is affecting you and making you feel bad.

When guru ji started the khalsa I believe he did not ask women to try and be like men... hence the titles Kaur (princess) and Singh (lion) no where were women required to keep hair but feminists in Sikhism have taken things too far wanting to be like men this is stupidness in my view. women shud be women and shud beautify themselves so that they attract a partner after you have a loving partner then you can do what you want.

Its hard as it is for Sikh males with full kesh to form relationships with women and get jobs in society so it must be more harder on sisters like you.

Thats my views sorry if i offended any1 with my views

[Mehtab Singh]

tabbo's 1st post is reasonable

147888[/snapback]

now i know why ur still unregistered

[disguised]

Women who wax their arms can't do it without yelling in pain, yet they do it.

Women who use lasers to remove facial hair end up messing up their face, yet they do it.

Women who shave their legs bleed and cry, yet they do it.

You be the one who stays the way God made you, and just smile

awww...yeaaa...like that...JUST LIKE THAT!!!  :T:

147849[/snapback]

well said mehtab veer ji! :TH:

[proud_to_be_singhni]

Lots of peeples been PMing me bout my big hairy toe and don't believe it exists....

well u sure u wana see the proof.....before you do please do remember you may feel a little queasy....lolllllllllllll

Anyways.....

here......

it.......

is....my toe and feet tooooo.......

BTW....Ive been dared to do this....No Disrespect ............. If anyone takes offence....Apologies!!!!

lollllllll......(i can count the number of hairs on my feet now with ease..hhahahah)

[disguised]

did u jst take tht pic... or took becuz u were dared?

[Mehtab Singh]

Wow nice feet. Let me touch my forehead to my screen! :WW:

[proud_to_be_singhni]

Wow nice feet. Let me touch my forehead to my screen!    :WW:

148291[/snapback]

...you do know that ur guna go to hell with me, cause thats where im headed .....completely UnWorthy!